Gay Couples Adopting

Fee_FLOWERhead:

lets keep children away from gay families because oh no! they might become gay and have their own personalities and opinions.
rather than give the children to a loving family that can bring them up in a stable home and teach them morals, we'll put them into an abusive family or a rich family.
yeah, because that is SO much better.

pffffft!

Exactly. It's ridiculous. Children need to be in a stable and loving home. If a family (wether or not the couple is homosexual) is able to provide the child with what it needs, and can supply love to a kid, then they should have every right to adopt.

Saying a gay couple can't adopt a child, when they're able to give them everything that child could ever need or want, is wrong. They're not gonna "catch" homosexuality. God, how naive are people?

I'd just be a bit worried about the child facing hate comments because they have two fathers, or two mothers. But children that have a black mom/dad and a white mom/dad could possibly face that too. As well as a child that only has one parent. It's impossible to imagine what kids are going to tease one another about anymore.

I'm all for gay adoption ;) Give a kid a loving home, I'd rather them grow up with a wonderful family, then in a shelter/orphanage.

Gay adoption is something that I am totally for. Somebody can't control if they're gay or not, and if they can't have a child with their mate, then obviously adopting is a good choice (:
And adopting a kid is very supportive & kind.
It does not matter if they are gay or straight. The warmness in their hearts matter.
I rest my case.

I'm all for it too, and I do support it.
The only thing I have mixed feelings on is how it might affect the child. Having two gay parents and going through high school with that could be hard on them.

Fallen From Grace:

I'm all for it too, and I do support it.
The only thing I have mixed feelings on is how it might affect the child. Having two gay parents and going through high school with that could be hard on them.

And going through high school with straight parents that have the wrong last name could be hard on them.
When I planned to marry Andie and have babies with her, we made a conscious decision to raise our children in a place where homosexuality was accepted. But even if it's not, which is better? Foster care or a gay family?

druscilla; overdose.:

Fallen From Grace:

I'm all for it too, and I do support it.
The only thing I have mixed feelings on is how it might affect the child. Having two gay parents and going through high school with that could be hard on them.

And going through high school with straight parents that have the wrong last name could be hard on them.
When I planned to marry Andie and have babies with her, we made a conscious decision to raise our children in a place where homosexuality was accepted. But even if it's not, which is better? Foster care or a gay family?

A gay family, for sure.
All I was saying that not everybody can raise their children in a environment that accepts homosexuality. It's true that having gay parents is only one small thing that can affect a child's life, but if the child is brought up in a place where being gay isn't accepted then it will be hard on them.

I had an argument with my friend about homosexuality. And her point of view si that, okay, being a gay couple is one thing. But then eventually, they will get married, and maybe want to adopt kids. She thinks that a gay couple should not be allowed to adopt kids, because bringing a child up in that sort of situation is like brainwashing them into thinking homosexuality is right.

I do not agree with that at all. Everyone deserves to feel love, and if people find love in those of the same gender, then they should be able to go on living the same type of lifestyle as everyone else, gay or not. I feel that children definately bring happiness into couples' lives, so if two men, or two women want to settle down and have kids (which is obviously not possible, so therefore, if two women or two men would like to adopt kids) then that should be possible without judgement. People should not be deprived of anything just because they are attracted to someone of the same sex.

Also, my cousin is gay, and this Christmas, he was talking about how he wants to try to settle down within the next few years (because he's 19 or 20) and that he wants to adopt kids. And I actually smiled, and it made me very emotional to hear that. Because growing up, he had been a crazy kid. So to hear him be serious for once was definately refreshing. And even though he was a crazy kid, he would make a great father. Which again, brings me to my point that a gay couple can be just as good parents as anybody else.

Also, in response to the previous post, even if homosexuality is not accepted where that gay couple chooses to live and adopt, having your family not be accepted is much better than not having a family at all; in my eyes anyway. At the end of the day, all that matters is that the child has a family that can provide for them, that can love them unconditionally, and that can teach them. And no one has the right to say that gay couples can't do any of that.

I think everyone should be able to have children, gay or not. But sadly, in the long run, the child usually comes off worse. Kids are cruel, and children adopted by gay couples suffer serious harrassment by other children. So although I dont think there is anything wrong with children being raised by homosexuals, I dont think they should be able to adopt, simply because in the long run its the child who suffers.

skank.:

I think everyone should be able to have children, gay or not. But sadly, in the long run, the child usually comes off worse. Kids are cruel, and children adopted by gay couples suffer serious harrassment by other children. So although I dont think there is anything wrong with children being raised by homosexuals, I dont think they should be able to adopt, simply because in the long run its the child who suffers.

Give me your statistics, please.

skank.:

I dont think they should be able to adopt, simply because in the long run its the child who suffers.

Do you have any statistics to verify that? :file:

STUDIES ABOUT CHILDREN RAISED BY GAY COUPLES

But most studies have found that outcomes for children of gay and lesbian parents are no better -- and no worse -- than for other children, whether the measures involve peer group relationships, self-esteem, behavioral difficulties, academic achievement, or warmth and quality of family relationships.
From this article.

The American Academy of Pediatrics' Committee on Psychosocial Aspects of Child and Family Health issued a report in 2002, the most recent comprehensive review of gay-parenting studies. It found no meaningful differences between children raised by gay parents and those raised by heterosexual parents.
...
The American Academy of Pediatrics report is the most prestigious of its kind, but it is not the only one. Most reviews of the social science research reach the same conclusion: The proposition that children suffer when raised by gay parents is without basis. Indeed, some evidence suggests that the only significant difference between children raised by same-sex couples and children raised by heterosexual couples is that the former feel freer to explore occupations and behaviors unhampered by traditional gender roles — a good thing, perhaps.
From this article.

The American Psychological Association, representing more than 155,000 psychologists, states that children of gay and lesbian parents are at no disadvantage psychologically or socially compared to children of heterosexual parents.
The American Academy of Pediatrics, the nation’s leading pediatric authority with 57,000 members, says that children who grow up with gay and/or lesbian parents fare as well in emotional, cognitive, social and sexual functioning as children with straight parents.
The National Association of Social Workers, with nearly 150,000 members, agrees that research on gay and lesbian parenting shows a total absence of pathological findings in their children.
“Not a single study has found children of gay or lesbian parents to be disadvantaged in any significant respect relative to children of heterosexual parents. Indeed, the evidence to date suggests that home environments provided by gay and lesbian parents are as likely as those provided by heterosexual parents to support and enable children’s psychosocial growth.” -- Charles J. Patterson, researcher at the University of Virginia, 2004
From this site.

:omfg: WHAT? YOU MEAN THEY ARENT ALL MISERABLE AND UNHAPPY LIKE EVERYONE SEEMS TO THINK????? THEY DON'T SUFFER???THEY'RE JUST AS WELL OFF? YOU MEAN ORIENTATION REALLY DOESN'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE!!!!

Sorry druscilla, but you must be crazy :coffee:

Kurtni Reznor:

:omfg: WHAT? YOU MEAN THEY ARENT ALL MISERABLE AND UNHAPPY LIKE EVERYONE SEEMS TO THINK????? THEY DON'T SUFFER???THEY'RE JUST AS WELL OFF? YOU MEAN ORIENTATION REALLY DOESN'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE!!!!

Sorry druscilla, but you must be crazy :coffee:

:lmfao

The motherly and fatherly roles in a child's growing up are highly important though.

Two women may not fully understand what it's like to be a boy, and so would lack in teaching their son about growing up.
Two men may not fully understand what it's like to be a girl, and so would lack in teaching their daughter about growing up.

Also, there's that constant fear that this would promote bullying at school, if you had same-sex parents.

I understand that people should be able to love who they wish, whatever the gender, but adopting a child is a totally different level.
A very complicated level at that too.

It's not all about having a stable and happy environment; it's about the influence.
A child may think that being attracted to the opposite sex is wrong.
They may feel confused because their friends are straight, yet they've grown up with same-sex couples.

A child may feel - even though they may not actually be - pressured into being gay.
Which could cause depression, anxiety, frustration, anger, self-harm, etc etc.
Teenagers can get very emotional, ya know?

It's all very well you lot going on about the stable and happy environment thing, and having free opinions on sexuality, but it's a very emotional matter.

Fingers:Intertwined:

The motherly and fatherly roles in a child's growing up are highly important though.

Two women may not fully understand what it's like to be a boy, and so would lack in teaching their son about growing up.
Two men may not fully understand what it's like to be a girl, and so would lack in teaching their daughter about growing up.

Also, there's that constant fear that this would promote bullying at school, if you had same-sex parents.

I understand that people should be able to love who they wish, whatever the gender, but adopting a child is a totally different level.
A very complicated level at that too.

It's not all about having a stable and happy environment; it's about the influence.
A child may think that being attracted to the opposite sex is wrong.
They may feel confused because their friends are straight, yet they've grown up with same-sex couples.

A child may feel - even though they may not actually be - pressured into being gay.
Which could cause depression, anxiety, frustration, anger, self-harm, etc etc.
Teenagers can get very emotional, ya know?

It's all very well you lot going on about the stable and happy environment thing, and having free opinions on sexuality, but it's a very emotional matter.

So, you're going to tell me that all these professional statistics are wrong? That your unfounded 14-year-old opinion is correct over these degreed and certified doctors and psychologists?

I also think it's ridiculous to believe that homosexual parents would encourage their child to be gay. I would never want my children to be gay. I would love them no matter what, but why would I wish that on them? Gay parents are more likely to let a child be who they are. How often do you hear about straight parents wanting their gay child to be straight? A helluva lot more than the reverse, I think.

Fingers:Intertwined:

The motherly and fatherly roles in a child's growing up are highly important though.

Two women may not fully understand what it's like to be a boy, and so would lack in teaching their son about growing up.
Two men may not fully understand what it's like to be a girl, and so would lack in teaching their daughter about growing up..

And these aren't taken away when one parent abandons the child?
They lack one or the other when growing up with a single mother or father. That doesn't make the single parent completely incapable of raising their child if the child is the opposite gender as they are.
So why is that any different for gay couples?

If anything, I'd think homosexual parents would understand more about the difficulties of growing up and being in school than a parent who had a normal upbringing and was never put down or bullied in school. I'm not going so far as to say which is better. A parent who was mentally abused through childhood by either parents, church, or school would understand the need to be yourself and would accept and even encourage individuality.

If a single mother can raise a boy to adulthood, why can't two homosexual femals raise a family to adulthood? And same with a single father and a homosexual couple. The differences are huge, but the basics are the same.

Going back to the basic ideals of love...that love is equal no matter who it's given by or to whom. Every human has the capability to love and be loved...who are we to stand in the way of a female loving a female or a male loving another male. And more, two females loving a child or two males loving a child!

:file:

It's also kind of insane to think that just because child is raised by two parents of the same gender they will never have any contact with adults of the gender opposite their parents. There's nothing to say they wouldn't have an adult female role model if they're a girl or an adult male role model if they are a boy.

I think it's wrong to think that only if you can make kids you're ready to have kids. And as far as I'm concerned sexuality has nothing to do with parenting skills.
I think adoption agencies should be extremly careful with everyone, not just gay parents. Pregnancy should come with a ''how to be a good parent'' course, but it doesn't.

As for buling, dunno if I were a parent and my kid got bullied at school, I'd do something about it and fix it. But how many parents actually do that ? Maybe gay parents are actually more aware of the possibility of bulling and so pay more attention to their kids. But it's just an opinion.

If the parents are stable, both financially and emotionally, then I really don't see what sexuality has to do with anything. If two people are unable to have a child, for whatever reason, and there are children deperate for adoption, then surely there is a logical course of action here...

This is ridiculous.
Just because people are heterosexual it does'nt mean they can't be bad parents
This whole discrimination against homosexuals is getting out of hand,honestly

Let people love whoever they want to love,would you