Homosexuality (and Everything Else)

@ Khal
I actually find the same in the US. Female homosexuality is acceptable, mainly because straight men are turned on by it. Male homosexuality is much less accepted by either gender. My mom believes it is ingrained in sexism and I agree. A man in a homosexual relationship, according to one of these people who views them as less, is "lowering himself" to the "position of a female" during sex. (Because, obviously, sex is the ONLY thing that matters to a gay relationship. /sarcasm)

@ dru is beautiful.
I felt that more often than not when I speak to people opposed to it, they describe being a lesbian or bisexual for women attention seeking and disgusting but when asked about gay people they are less assertive ? I'm not sure of what word to use but there's less hostility towards it to me, but it may just be me and the people around here. I do know that the things you say are true though, about the men finding it attractive and about gay men.

I wish that it didn't matter who people wanted to be in a relationship with but it'll take time before the opposition towards it to settle down, even though I know it won't be gone completely.

I go to this Christian school and they're totally against it... One of my closest and wisest friend is gay though. I go to him for his opinions on things. I personally think gay people are so strong... especially when the people around you disapprove. <3 My friend has to put his best foot forward even when he gets judged all the time. My heart really goes out to all of those people suffering because they know their friends and family will not accept.

I work for a company answering phones and taking orders/answering questions ect. And it's a call center so there's a lot of us, I have coworkers, and neighbors and what not. But we take calls from all over the country, and every once in a while a customer feels the need to tell us their views on "hot button issues."

The other day this woman started off telling me about her views on current politics. But somehow ended up on the subject of gay people. And this is what she said to me (among other things but this was the big point):
"I drew the line when they [gay people] wanted to get married. Because that brings children into it and I was just, no. I've seen plenty of children get messed up from small things in two parent homes. But having parents of the same sex? No. And Homosexuals can't breed so they have to find other ways to recruit."

This floored me. I live in a very liberal area and was raised to see people as people regardless of who they loved. And I don't really have a problem with homophobia or people that thinking homosexuality is wrong because of their religion. That's their call. I mean, there will always be people who don't agree with it. But what bothered me so much was that her view was that they were going to recruit. That the ability to turn children gay was extremely plausible, and that their only reason for wanting children and getting married was to make more gay people. That it wasn't about love, and the ability to have a family.

And it made me angry, yeah. But mostly it just made me sad.

I talked to one of my co-workers about it, and she told me about how she lived in San Francisco in the 1980's when AIDS was major and so was homophobia. And she told me that she was friends with a lot of gay men because they generally enjoyed the same things. And then she went on to tell me that over the course of her time there she went to over 100 funerals. And not all of them were AIDS of course, many were suicides or homicides. She went on to tell me about how she was a notary for the hospital (one of two) so she would go there and help dying AIDS patients with paper work and all that other notary stuff. And one time, in the hallway, she heard a father of a dying AIDS patient say:
"I'm glad my son is dying, because he's gay, and that's wrong."

And I know that we've come so so far from the 1980's. And I know that we have a million miles to go. But it breaks my heart to know that these stories exist, and will continue to.

This is how I see it (and this tends to be my view about a lot of big issues).

People are people. I don't care who you love, what religion you are, who you voted for, what gender you identify as. You are a person. You feel, and you love, and you hurt just like me.

So, I don't care if you're homophobic. I really just wish that people could see other people as people. That they could understand that no matter what path their life has taken they're made up of the same stuff as we are. That at a base level we are all the same.

And that person that you're saying only wants a family because they want to make more gay people? Imagine how you would feel if people said that to you. Imagine how you would feel if you loved someone, and you couldn't help it, and people ostracized you, beat you up, killed you, because of it.

Homophobia isn't wrong. Homosexuality isn't wrong.

It's the fact that there are people in this world who don't think of gay people as people.

Some of my best friends are gay. And it makes me so fucking sad that there are people who would hate them without meeting them just because of that fact.

If we could just stop putting people into labeled boxes and classify everyone as human instead of "gay" or "straight" or "you aren't like me" or "My God says that's wrong" the world would be a lot better place to live in.

/rant.

@ Rebell
I agree with everything you said except the 'homophobia isn't wrong' part. I think homophobia is very wrong. The very definition of homophobia contains the word "irrational" which means it is not rational. The definition of rational is "based on or in accordance with reason or logic". That definition may not make homophobia wrong but it makes it unreasonable and illogical, which is a good enough reason to call it "wrong" to me. (I don't generally think things that are unreasonable and illogical are right.)

@ dru is beautiful.
I think what I'm really trying to say there is that, I think people should be able to believe whatever way they want. While I don't agree with homophobia (because it perpetuates the idea that gays are not people) I think it's just as wrong for me to complain about homophobes to someone as it was for that woman to complain to me about gay people. If that makes sense?

I do agree with you though. That it is an irrational thought process and that it is definitely very very damaging to everyone who has to deal with it.
I just kind of wish we could let everyone live their own life and not attack each other about who we love or what we believe.
But I guess it's like this, gay people are going to continue to exist, and so are homophobic people. And we should all probably just get used to it and not put those people into boxes regardless of what we personally think of their view points and life style.

@ Rebell
The problem with homophobic attitudes though is that they're not just left as opinions; they can negatively interfere with the quality of a LGTBQ persons' life, especially with the laws and regulations that discriminate against them.

@ Rebell
I think people should be allowed to think being gay is a sin. But I don't think people should be able to use negative "opinions" to hurt others. That is where the line needs to be drawn.

@ dru is beautiful.
I agree with this. And I think that things will (and have) start to get better as the world starts to become more accepting. It's becoming less and less easy to speak out and act against gay people and I think that's a good thing. But yes, you've said what I was trying (I didn't do a very good job).

@ I feel insane
Agreed. That's where the problem lies. Not that they have the opinions but that they do act on them. I just wish (and it's true wishful thinking) that people could keep those kind of opinions to themselves. I wish they could realize that acting on these views doesn't stop anyone from being LGTBQ.

It's not that I don't think that the things homophobes do to gay people isn't detrimental, it very much is. It's that I WISH we could all just have our opinions and get along, but we don't live in a perfect world. I just hope some day. And just like homophobia cannot force gay people to be straight, no one can force homophobes to accept, tolerate, or be civil towards gay people. It's a hard line.

But the rule should be the one our parents always told us: Treat others the way you would like treated.

I believe that marriage is for a man and a woman, that is my personal opinion. However, I have several friends that are gay, lesbian, bisexual, etc. I have no problem with that, and I love them all. I also do not believe in taking any rights away from couples of the same sex. If they want to get married, they should be able to. If they want to adopt a child, I am all for it. I am adopted and I know how many children are out there that need good homes. If a couple of the same sex is willing to give them a good home, why would we deny them that right? Like I said, they shouldn't be denied anything.

@ Rachel-Marie
While I appreciate everything you said, I'm confused as to how you simultaneously think marriage is between a man and a woman, but two women should be able to get married?

I'm not homosexual, I think it's wrong, but to each it's own, I don't discriminate because it's someone's preference

I know this is history (a month?) but I still feel the need to put this. Marriage was originally not about love, it was a religious constitution, so when people say gay marriage ruins the sanctity of marriage it kind of puts me off. Doesn't domestic abuse put a damper on marriage? Or how about divorce? As a homosexual, I can say when people are against it, it makes hardly any sense. Sure, it's abnormal, but things that are abnormal aren't necessarily wrong, are they? Now, womens rights were always something debated, it was, at one point, weird for a woman to live on her own and have rights, well, that changed because, even though it was abnormal at the time, woman believed they deserved rights (and they did). I don't see how gay marriage is any different.

@ nicey1205
I'm slightly confused. If you don't discriminate over other people's preferences, then why do you categorize homosexuality as "wrong"?

In my opinion it is but, who am I to judge to each his/her own. What I feel that's wrong may not be to you, it's an opinion. I have friends that are gay, I treat them no differently than I would a hetrosexual. I love them just the same. I have relatives that are homosexual, I still love them I still socialize with them. If you were/are gay I would treat you no different than what you are a human being and we all deserve to be loved. Just because I don't agree with someones sexual preference doesn't mean that I discriminate or banish people from my life, I treat no one differently, I say live and let live. Discriminate definition is I quote from a dictionary "To distinguish, to make distinctions in treatment, show partiality or prejudice" I do none of this I simply voiced my opinion I love and I love hard and I grief hard to lose someone I love devastates me no matter how they choose to live their life. I don't tolerate them I love them

@ nicey1205
I understand that. Of course I'm glad that you're so accepting but I mean, I'm confused over, if you accept people no matter who they love, then why do you think homosexuality is wrong? That was the distinction I was trying to make. Why is homosexuality wrong to you?

I'm not trying to hate on your opinion, I'm just legitimately curious.

I think it's wrong from the bible prospective, the bible also shares the message of love so maybe there could be a contradiction on my opinion or the bible. Like I said I treat no one gay or hetrosexual differently. I was raised by my parents to love all no matter color, sexual preference, etc.

@ PierceMyHeart
Thank you for the extended explanation. I was wondering if your opinion had a religious origin but I didn't want to be presumptuous.

I appreciate your open mindedness, especially when there are still so many people who treat LGBTQ+ people like garbage due to their beliefs. :)

Edited by a moderator.

@ Mr. Fahrenheit
I completely agree with you :)