What Do You Think of Sex in Stories?

  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    36
    Location:
    United States
    I'm trying to phrase this and it's very difficult for me to find the right words, so bear with me.

    I think the literary world has an obligation to explore everything which can be explored with words. I don't feel each writer needs to personally carry that obligation, but that they should push themselves to the boundaries with which they feel comfortable pushing. I do not believe a censure should ever hold someone back (with the exception of child pornography). The written word should explore everything. Love, hate, death, sex, murder, push all boundaries, find new ways of exploring social mores.

    We should always be willing to explore the boundaries, as writers, and to push them as far as we can. I'm not saying that someone who doesn't want to write sex should. I'm saying someone who wants to, or who wants to try to, should. And they shouldn't be censured for it.

    The same goes for any topic. Murder, rape, death, incest, mental disorders, self harm, pregnancy, etc.

    With the exception of child pornography, I see no stone that should be left unturned in the written word. Why should anyone keeps us from writing down the world as we explore it? Why shouldn't we be able to share what we create in our minds? Who has the right to take that away from us, to take the words we write and demean and belittle them?

    I recently came across a writer who wrote things I would never in my life want to read, but I would defend their right to write it. And I think that respect should be honored between readers and writers. I'll write whatever I want and you can read whatever you want and not read what you don't.

    My words do not to change for your eyes and your eyes do not need to change for my words.

    [Damn, I wrote a novel there, didn't I? Shifty]
    February 6th, 2010 at 06:28am
  • carcinogenic.

    carcinogenic. (250)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    32
    Location:
    Canada
    ^You worded that perfectly, Dru... Thank you, and I agree 100%.

    -

    I used to prefer longer sex scenes, but lately I've really started to enjoy the kind that threatens to feel like a rip-off... sudden and summed-up in just a few sentences. It's not so much that I've changed my mind about what's best in stories, but I really like the challenge of putting a lot of meaning into that short, cut-off description of what's about to happen. I like reading longer sex scenes in stories, too, with all the emotions explored, but it's interesting to form your own conclusions too, sometimes.
    February 7th, 2010 at 05:34am
  • Rocket Queen

    Rocket Queen (405)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    33
    Location:
    Australia
    I enjoy reading and writing sex scenes. It's something that's never really bothered me that much. I mean, it's a pretty huge part of life so I don't feel the need to censor it or not even mention it at all.

    Though these days I mostly prefer to read them. I kinda lost all interest in writing sex scenes maybe a year or two ago? I just have trouble describing them in great detail and getting them to sound just perfect when I've never experienced anything sexual myself. The actions come easily to me to describe, but the feelings and emotions involved during the act? Now that's slightly harder for me to describe.
    February 8th, 2010 at 05:10pm
  • astronaut.

    astronaut. (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    31
    Location:
    Canada
    I think that sex should be a part of every story, save a few. Humans have such a strong sexual drive that to me it seems unrealistic if sex is not mentioned.

    The detail in which you go into really depends on the piece you're writing. If the piece needs the detailed sex in it then you just can't just skip over it. If the sex is not a big part of the story, then I don't think you need to go into extreme detail about it. I find that sometimes, authors will write sex scenes to keep people interested. It can be a bit lazy on the writer's part- they're simply using sex to keep thier reader's attention and they're not taking the time to keep you intrigued with thier actual writing.

    That's just my personal opinion. I hope that made sense.
    February 9th, 2010 at 02:09am
  • Georgia Fair

    Georgia Fair (105)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    28
    Location:
    Australia
    Well, I try not to write it, but sometimes it's absolutely essential to the story :/
    But not all published books with sex in them are adult books. The Tomorrow Series, by John Marsden. He wrote some smex, and the series is for teenagers (:
    April 8th, 2010 at 07:41am
  • swell

    swell (150)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    29
    Location:
    Australia
    I'm writing sex in a story.
    It's turning out to be erotic fiction more than an actual story.
    It's the first time I've written a sex scene, and in the story it's in, it's somewhat pointless.
    But it's the only story I'm going to write explicit sex like that.
    April 8th, 2010 at 09:07am
  • tangled wires;

    tangled wires; (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    29
    Location:
    United States
    Mocking Bird;Perfect:
    Eh, I don't really like it. Because it's just really weird to read sometimes. I mean I just like regular stories, not stuff thats perverted. (Sorry if this offends you:file: ) I mean sure I've read stories that hint sex, but not give full on detail about it. But whatever if you like it read/write go on ahead. Sure I know ratings tell if their are going to be innportiate content but I just don't think it's needed, like that guy said before you wouldn't find it in regular books at the store; unless it was like from a porn shop and you were going to masturbate over it.

    Then again it's very rare when I actually read stories and subscribe to them on Mibba.

    Sorry I didn't contribute dru... :|
    That is so not even true. I was reading a Anne Rice's retelling of Sleeping Beauty and that had plenty of sex scenes and it wasn't a porno to masturbate to. Thankyouverymuch.

    I am pro-sex scenes, although I haven't written one yet. I've read plenty of young adult books that have sex. Like this vampire book I read had plenty of sex scenes, of course they weren't in full-blown description. I think sex scenes complete stories. You're not really grasping a teenager who's in love's view if there isn't any sex. Teenagers have sex, therefore stories should too.
    April 8th, 2010 at 08:53pm
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    36
    Location:
    United States
    Sex is an important part of life.
    To think it shouldn't be written about because one finds it to be perverted is just stupid.
    You wouldn't be here if it weren't for sex.
    If you don't want to read it that's fine, but it's sometimes needed for stories.
    And I'm actually less likely to read a story without sex. And while I am a pervert, it's nothing to do with that. Sex displays emotions to me in a way that no other act in a story can.
    April 8th, 2010 at 09:28pm
  • Mrs.Brightside

    Mrs.Brightside (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    31
    Location:
    Greece
    ^^ Very good point. I agree.

    I believe that depending on how a sex scene is written, it can actually play a, maybe not huge but still, part of the plot.
    June 18th, 2010 at 06:51am
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    36
    Location:
    United States
    I really like writing the detailed sex scenes versus the more poetic sex scenes, personally. And that's because for me, personally, the poetic sort of non-detailed sex scenes are one of [if not] the easiest things for me to write. Seriously, I could write one in my sleep. It's just not a challenge for me to put out a two to three hundred word "poetic" R or PG-13 rated sex scene. It's not a challenge and it's just sort of boring for me. Sometimes it's necessary for the story but, given the choice, I prefer to write details. Because I don't like to sleep through my writing. tehe
    June 18th, 2010 at 07:00am
  • Out There

    Out There (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    29
    Location:
    Great Britain (UK)
    Here's what I think: if a writer can write a sex scene that is well-done, more than just pointless sex, original and insightful - they can write pretty much anything well.
    June 18th, 2010 at 04:52pm
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    36
    Location:
    United States
    Just out of curiosities sakes: why do people think writing a sex scene is so incredibly difficult?

    Because I don't and I'm always curious . . .
    June 18th, 2010 at 04:55pm
  • Rocket Queen

    Rocket Queen (405)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    33
    Location:
    Australia
    dru kept it forever.:
    Just out of curiosities sakes: why do people think writing a sex scene is so incredibly difficult?

    Because I don't and I'm always curious . . .
    I think part of it could be realism. Trying to make the sex scene as realistic as possible, especially if the person having difficulty with it has never experienced sex themselves. I mean, yeah you could watch sex scenes in movies or whatever to try and recreate it, but there's also the feelings and emotions they have to consider that are taking place during the scene.

    It might be harder for them to try and describe that as accurately as possible, again, if they've never had that experience themselves.
    June 19th, 2010 at 06:12pm
  • goaway5556

    goaway5556 (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    29
    Location:
    United States
    I think sex in stories is a nice thing to have. I may not be able to write it, but I do enjoy reading it. In Love
    June 19th, 2010 at 06:24pm
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    36
    Location:
    United States
    Rocket Queen:
    It might be harder for them to try and describe that as accurately as possible, again, if they've never had that experience themselves.
    I suppose. But a lot of people write things they've never experienced.

    Not that I'm saying it's not hard for them. I just don't understand. I've been writing sex for 12 years and I didn't lose my virginity until 4 years ago.
    June 19th, 2010 at 07:00pm
  • Rocket Queen

    Rocket Queen (405)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    33
    Location:
    Australia
    dru kept it forever.:
    I suppose. But a lot of people write things they've never experienced.

    Not that I'm saying it's not hard for them. I just don't understand. I've been writing sex for 12 years and I didn't lose my virginity until 4 years ago.
    Yeah, I get that. I mean, I started writing sex scenes probably when I was about 14 or 15 and even back then I tried to emulate what I had read from other sex scenes I liked that seemed realistic enough.

    I think that the emotions may be the hardest thing to describe if you've never experienced sex. You can ask people what it's like, but even then they'll say things such as, "Oh, it's hard to describe". Or at least that's what's happened when I ask others what it's like. I'd say it's quite difficult to capture that kind of thing unless you had experienced it for yourself. Of course you could have a go at describing it and have it turn out quite realistic.

    But that's just one of the reasons I personally don't write in-depth sex scenes anymore.
    June 19th, 2010 at 07:08pm
  • silk tea.

    silk tea. (400)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    31
    Location:
    United States
    I've written smut before, I've just yet to post it. It's sometimes a bit uncomfortable because of the word choice. Like I really have no desire to put 'penis' in my story. Or any other word relating to that. To me, sometimes it just sounds...vulgar.
    June 19th, 2010 at 07:58pm
  • Audrey T

    Audrey T (6730)

    :
    Admin
    Gender:
    Age:
    35
    Location:
    United States
    ^ I think I get what you're saying... Do you mean simply not using any name when reffering to sex organs (penis, cock, dick...)? Or do you mean using some other kind of "substitute" word?

    Personally, when I write a sex scene, or any intimate moment, I avoid...naming or pointing out any particular body part. It just wouldn't fit into my writing if I did.

    I prefer sex scenes that can give you a good picture of what's going on without bluntly saying "...and he put his penis in her vagina" or any other variation of that; I usually find the variations simply laughable - "...and he pushed his throbbing member into her moist folds." - makes me feel like I'm reading some crappy grocery store romance. I think that writing about sex in a way that's more subtle can be very effective and still keep your story intact without flipping it into smut.

    I do think that sex, in some stories, is unavoidable, and I don't think that any writer should purposely avoid it if it's going to come off as unnatural. But, it doesn't need to be a sordid affair or done in graphic detail. When writing a sex scene, I think it's important to compare it to the rest of your story and see what's going to fit best.
    June 19th, 2010 at 08:09pm
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    36
    Location:
    United States
    ^
    That's part of the reason I hate het sex. Writing/reading. THERE ARE NO GOOD SYNONYMS FOR VAJAYJAYS. Facepalm
    June 19th, 2010 at 08:19pm
  • Audrey T

    Audrey T (6730)

    :
    Admin
    Gender:
    Age:
    35
    Location:
    United States
    ^ XD I don't think ther's any good synonyms for any of it, to be honest. It all just seems so cheesy. I've seen some really cringeworthy synonyms for penis: throbbing member (which I mentioned before, I'm sure at some point it was ingenious, but it's so overdone now), sword, prick, his pride (my personal favorite of the worst)...

    But even so, among the bad synonyms there's still a way to chose one that'll fit best into your story. I can't count how many times I've read stories where the words chosen just completely conflicted with the intended mood of the scene.
    June 19th, 2010 at 08:33pm