V For Virgin.

Lost mine when I was fourteen and a half.. well, my p-in-v virginity anyway. It does sound young, but I knew what I was doing.

I don't regret it. I could have picked a more sincere person, but I was younger and stupider then and I was madly in sickly-sweet puppy love. I would've done whatever he'd asked me. I wish I hadn't been so desperate for acceptance and approval, but if I hadn't of lost it with him, then I probably wouldn't have had the guts to lose it to a non-"special-someone" person, and I would have missed out on some really fun nights with other people. And as unorthodox as it is for a 15 year old to enjoy casual sex, I really did.

Now I have a serious relationship with the boy, I think it would have been nice for us to lose our virginities together, since he lost his to me, but it was awkward enough as it was, it would have been hell if it was doubly uncoordinated!

I posted in this a long time ago, but I'm still a virgin. Just not in a rush for it really. Plus I only have one person in mind for it, no one else. But I'm not saving it for anything. It just doesn't cross my mind to the point where I'm obsessing over it. I don't know. Being a virgin or not isn't that serious to me. But when people say they lost it at what I consider ridiculous ages such as 11 or 12, then I think it matters because when I was that age, sex didn't cross my mind at all. And if you're like, 40 and you're still a virgin, then I'll laugh at you because you have no real reason to wait anymore unless you're waiting till marriage, which I still fine ridiculous.

Edit
Haha, reading through my earlier posts and I realized ho badly I worded things. I guess what I really wanted to say was that if I were to have sex, it would be with someone I wouldn't mind having a baby with. I don't want to have children every time I have sex (although I don't like the idea of condoms) but I don't want to "accidentally" breed an idiot into the world. Because you know in life, shit happens. I won't let shit get that out of hand, you know, screwing some bum loser then having a half bum loser baby on accident. (If I offended anyone by speaking on my non-existing bum baby, I apologize.)

I'm 18 and I'm still a virgin. I won't say I'm proud, but I'm certainly not ashamed of it.

A lot of people say things about "making sure it's with someone you love" or "someone you trust." I really don't have that view point. Now, I don't exactly have the experience to say this for everyone else, but from where I sit right now, I'd rather have sex with someone I'll never have to think about again (not that I won't think about them again, just that I won't have to).

I'm afraid that if it's with someone I know, I'll embarrass myself in some way, or it will just be awkward in general. If that happens with a stranger, I wouldn't be concerned with my day to day relationship with them. I wouldn't have to think about it.

Besides that, with everyone I've gotten to know so far, once I got to know them, any sexual appeal goes away (never had a boyfriend, so...). I'm not interested in having sex with a friend of mine or anything to that effect.

@ BOSS
I'd have to agree with you on the stranger thing. I wouldn't want it to be a complete stranger though, cause that's just degrading to me. But not someone I really care about (depending on circumstances, though)

^ What's the difference between a "stranger" and a "complete stranger" and why is one "just degrading" and the other the ideal circumstance for losing virginity?

To me, a complete stranger is someone I don't even know their name or anything. Stranger is more like someone I know of, but I don't know them closely. I guess I feel it's degrading because... well, I guess I didn't use the best of words. I meant to say something like, loose/ carefree. I'm not that loose.

I'm still a virgin...sort of. Well, if you count oral sex. My boyfriend and I have been talking about it a lot lately since the only problem I had before was birth control, but he solved that problem.

My mom is an Anti-Sex Nazi. She constantly telling me that sex ruins a relationship, and I can see why she says it, but I also wish she was more open-minded.

So, to have sex or to not have sex?

I've been thinking a lot about the whole thing. Should I have sex with my boyfriend of five months? I know I want to, oh god how I want it (says the horny teenager). But since I really care about this relationship, I don't want to screw anything up. I am sixteen, almost seventeen. I think seventeen is an okay age to have sex at. Close enough to a mature adulthood.

But all you people who are saying ten-year-olds are having sex?!?! What? When did this happen? My god. I was shocked enough when my fourteen-year-old sister in eighth grade told me she had a friend who constantly had sex with her boyfriend. I mean, I understand people get horny when they're going through changes like that, but come on. That's what masturbating is for. I have no idea where this all started. I mean, the media isn't spewing out "Having Sex Young is the New Black!" right?

I'm 21, and I'm not ashamed to say that I'm still a virgin. I've fooled around with guys and done a lot of things, but I've never had actual sexual intercourse. It's not that I'm saving it for "the one" or for religious purposes, that sort of thing, there's just no one that I've dated/hung out with that I particularly care to have sex with

@ BOSS
You could have sex with someone you love and never see that person again after you break up, though.

I'm not going one way or another on that, 'cause it's personal, but I doubt I'll ever see my first again in my life and we were very much in love.

@ fat lamb
The question is are you ready to have sex? I guess I should elaborate more on it. In the event if your boyfriend breaks up with you after sex, will you be able to handle the way you felt about him taking your virginity, then breaking up with you? That's usually the big problem most girls I know have. It's the thought that he took your virginity. And do you feel sex will or can distract you in a major way? If the answer is no then yes, respectively, then... just know that I don't recommend it.

@ Ayana Sioux
You know it's an interesting thing, the thought of someone "having" another's virginity, as if it's something you can physically hold. It's like a soul--not something you can see and kind of an abstract idea. I know that there's this skin that breaks when penetrated during intercourse (how doctor's can tell if you're a virgin) but what really is virginity? Is it worth getting all huffy over? I think a debate on the issue could go on for hours. Is sex as big a deal as we make it out to be?

@ fat lamb
Some people make it a bigger deal that others. I'm kind of in the middle. It's not a huge deal for me, but it's not to be taken lightly. i.e. I won't have sex partners over 20 in my whole life. I think that's a little... off. If someone else has, what the fuck ever, that's your choice and you have to live with it. It doesn't affect me. But it's not for me. But I'm not the one to be waiting until I'm married. The only reason why I'm still a virgin is because I just don't want to have sex with anyone right now... well, I have to be honest, only one person in particular, but I'm not eager for it. I highly doubt I'll be a virgin before I marry and if I do marry (which I'm not sure) I know I'm not going to stray. But if my husband does, than why don't I? I think that's the best payback anyone can give.

@ fat lamb
Yes, and no. It's not a simple question. As a woman, I feel sex is a bigger deal for me than society thinks it should be. I feel that women are supposed to be undersexed and since I am very sexual person, sex is a big deal.

Do I feel that it's the emotional big deal it's been made out to be? Not for everyone. Definitely not for me. I've only dated two of the people I've had sex with; most were casual one night stands or 1-2 week flings. I don't find anything wrong with that and I clearly had no emotional attachment.

But sex can lead to pregnancies and STDs, so clearly it still can be a big deal.

It's a very complicated question.

I'm 20, married and still a virgin. My family keeps telling that my husband is going to leave me because I won't have sex with him. It's been almost a year though and he hasn't even brought it up. I'm almost always with him so I know he isn't cheating or anything. This might sound pathetic but the idea of having sex and children (should it happen the first time) bothers me a lot more than it should. Not so much that it scares me but kind of borderline.

I freaked out the first time we wanted to (wedding night) and I still freak out when I consider getting it over with. Oops.

So, I made this thread three years ago, and I am no longer a virgin. My first time was horrible and I lost my V-card in college, I personally waited when I knew I was mentally and physically ready. I felt no different afterwards, but my body sure did. I didn't like it, but I had no choice to deal.

I've grown to accept myself and my body now that I'm a woman and is doing a lot of dating. But it's not as simple, there are faults that I have about my body and it's distracting me to even step over that line with someone. Because if I don't like a certain thing about my body, then he most certainly will not either. Right now, my biggest concern is finding someone who accepts my body the way it is, which is hard as hell.

I lost my virginity at fifteen and it was awful- purely because we were immature and had no idea what we were doing. I had already been with the guy for about a year and we continued to date for another year and a half. Since the two of us broke up- I've been with two other guys.

@dr. faustus
You'd be surprised how much a lot of guys don't care about the flaws that you see.
Like... one of my breasts is relatively larger than the other- you can't tell unless you see me shirtless (which is a rare occurrence). And I was so uncomfortable that I would like- refuse to be in anything less than a tank top. One day- my boyfriend confronted me about it purely because he didn't care at all! And I've been with two other guys after him and I've made my concerns known- but both of them said the same thing that the first did.
As soon as you're comfortable with yourself- you realize that guys don't care that much!

@ Alex;
You're only twenty. If you were like fifteen years older and wouldn't have sex with your husband I'd be more concerned for you- but lot of people don't lose the v-card until their twenties. You married young because I assume the two of you loved each other. Part of being in love young (despite actually marital status) is having sex for the first time.
I actually find it oddly incredibly romantic that your first time would be with your husband :3

Ahh. It'll happen when it'll happen. It'll suck, but it'll be great. I'll use protection. I'll be eighteen or over. It'll be with someone special.
Or maybe it won't. I don't know my fate, but that doesn't mean I don't control it

My mom always told me that when a guy sees a naked girl, his only thoughts are 'naked girl naked girl naked girl'.

dr. faustus:

Because if I don't like a certain thing about my body, then he most certainly will not either.

From experience, this is not true. And, actually, being in a sexual relationship broke down a lot of my barriers of self-hatred and self-disgust; being told, sincerely, that a person thinks you are beautiful - desires you, desires your body and mind and self - it's not just flattering, when it's sincere, it's something more. It allows for another perspective, for a more realistic assessment of yourself - or, worst case scenario, unrealistic insofar as the other person is blinded by their attraction to you. In which case, who cares

I was equally sure of what you're saying and equally anxious about sex as others have suggested, but if you can wait until it's someone you know cares about you and desires you, I think that alleviates much of the anxiety. Though my "have sex with someone a little bit special" is mostly on the basis of, if you are seeking something longterm, why waste time with things you know aren't going to work out? So it's only applicable to people/situations where those values - monogamy, commitment - are privileged. If you don't hold the values, obviously do what you like. (Ohhhh how very magnanimous of me.) (Sorry.)

@ pravda.
Thank you. I haven't had sex a lot (only five times with my last boyfriend - and that was in February), so me being comfortable in my skin yet hasn't sank in. I haven't been in a serious, sexual relationship yet, but I know once I do, my flaws shouldn't be a big deal at all. But thanks to all the comments above as well. And I'm just tripping over about some stretch marks that i'm getting on my thighs, I don't like them