Self-Injury Ed and Support

  • d.isenchanted

    d.isenchanted (100)

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    I was bullied when i moved school in year 3 (i was 9) it carried on untill i entered high school at 11, but it got worse i used to try and break my boness, it made me feel better and i could blame it on falling playing football i'd also blame it on having weak wrists (i used to injur them easily when i was little) . I never cut because it would be noticable as i'm a dancer. Anyway i started to make new friends who were going through the same things as me & we started talking about it, my friends helped me to stop & i learnt to express my feelings through art, my dancing, music & writing. I recently turned back to self harm after i was beaten up after school, i don't know why i do it it just helps me feel better, people call me at school and bully me for being 'Emo'. I've been sucicidal due to people making me feel like shit. I went on a trip with school were everyone ignored me & i had a major argument with my friend (who helped me stop Self-injury in the beggining) and it felt like an escape i told my friends that i wanted to die, they told my teachers (which i still haven't forgiven them for) who keep an eye on me now to make sure i don't feel like i used to, they talked me through it and are helping me to stop. I've not completely stoped, i no longer try & hurt myself as often or break my bones although when i feel upset or stressed i still feel the need to hurt myself by banging my head repeatadly on things like desks. Which many people at school wouldn't associate with self-injury as they all seem to think that cutting is the only type of self-injury, so when they see me doing it they just think i'm weird.
    April 15th, 2007 at 02:14pm
  • sunflowers.

    sunflowers. (300)

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    I don't want support myself. I guess some people may want it and thats cool but I haven't cut in a month and I managed that all on my own!
    April 15th, 2007 at 05:28pm
  • kafka.

    kafka. (150)

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    I think with some people support would just make it worst
    i mean there are people who can get to accept the fact they cut themselves or whatever else they are doing and that everyone will know it from now on
    but they are other who don't want people like relatives, annoying relatives, to know about they problem, that's why they try to get out on their own

    but i think you do need help
    okay, maybe you cant just go to your mum and say ' hey mum , I cut myself, yeah I think I need help'my mum would just freak out and send me to some crazy people island far far away from her, but you can tell your friends, i mean that's what friends are for
    friends are definetly the persons who you can turn to for help in this kind of matters. at least real friends

    man what was i tring to say ? i forgot -_-
    April 15th, 2007 at 06:57pm
  • Ridiculosis

    Ridiculosis (150)

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    E.E.:
    I think with some people support would just make it worst
    i mean there are people who can get to accept the fact they cut themselves or whatever else they are doing and that everyone will know it from now on
    but they are other who don't want people like relatives, annoying relatives, to know about they problem, that's why they try to get out on their own

    but i think you do need help
    okay, maybe you cant just go to your mum and say ' hey mum , I cut myself, yeah I think I need help'my mum would just freak out and send me to some crazy people island far far away from her, but you can tell your friends, i mean that's what friends are for
    friends are definetly the persons who you can turn to for help in this kind of matters. at least real friends

    man what was i tring to say ? i forgot -_-
    Yeah, I really didn't want my family to know, but they found out anyway. I'd rather turn to my friends or teachers for support.
    April 17th, 2007 at 12:53am
  • Kerplunk Girl

    Kerplunk Girl (150)

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    Self harm comes in many forms because of many reasons, it's an issue that will never faid among with a lot of otheer issues.

    Either get yourself help, or someone else will.

    The simply thing is; you can get help.
    April 17th, 2007 at 06:34pm
  • Ridiculosis

    Ridiculosis (150)

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    Kerplunk Girl:
    Self harm comes in many forms because of many reasons, it's an issue that will never faid among with a lot of otheer issues.

    Either get yourself help, or someone else will.

    The simply thing is; you can get help.
    Yeah, that's true, but I think for some people it may be hard to believe.
    April 21st, 2007 at 11:42pm
  • billie.

    billie. (100)

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    You choose happiness; it doesn't choose you.
    Some people, in the absolute worst situations can remain positive.
    I'm not saying that depression doesn't exist, but sometimes,
    we forget that we can choose to be happy instead of choosing
    to feel sorry for ourselves.
    April 22nd, 2007 at 12:17pm
  • The Queen.

    The Queen. (100)

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    I have done cutting before. I am addicted to it and nothing works to help me get better. Its like a drug. Once you start you crave to do it more and more. The sad part about it is it actually works. It sends nerves and hormones from your brain and makes you feel better. But I know there are better ways to deal with it. But I just cant deal with them.

    The way i can stop myself though for a while is the fact that every time I do it I get sent to a mental hospital for a long time. Its horrible there and they treat you like scum. Never go there. it scar's you for life. Its just fucking horrid...
    April 23rd, 2007 at 03:13am
  • Ridiculosis

    Ridiculosis (150)

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    Magazine Sickness.:
    You choose happiness; it doesn't choose you.
    Some people, in the absolute worst situations can remain positive.
    I'm not saying that depression doesn't exist, but sometimes,
    we forget that we can choose to be happy instead of choosing
    to feel sorry for ourselves.
    Yes, that is true, but I think you may even be taught that way sometimes. Depression is there, though.
    April 23rd, 2007 at 10:21pm
  • billie.

    billie. (100)

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    I never said it wasn't.
    I believe it is a real mental illness.
    Sometimes though, we do ourselves no favours
    by choosing to feel sorry for ourselves and shutting
    off from the world, rather than surrounding ourselves
    with things that make us happy.
    April 24th, 2007 at 08:06am
  • Ridiculosis

    Ridiculosis (150)

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    Magazine Sickness.:
    I never said it wasn't.
    I believe it is a real mental illness.
    Sometimes though, we do ourselves no favours
    by choosing to feel sorry for ourselves and shutting
    off from the world, rather than surrounding ourselves
    with things that make us happy.
    True, very true.
    April 24th, 2007 at 10:53pm
  • Kerplunk Girl

    Kerplunk Girl (150)

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    Stand'in'the'rain!:
    Kerplunk Girl:
    Self harm comes in many forms because of many reasons, it's an issue that will never fade along with a lot of other issues.

    Either get yourself help, or someone else will.

    The simply thing is; you can get help.
    Yeah, that's true, but I think for some people it may be hard to believe.
    Yeah, I understand that, but as I said, if you can't get yourself help, someone else will.
    But there are a lot of different situations that make getting help hard, so people basically hurt themselves for long periods of time.
    April 28th, 2007 at 07:06am
  • Ridiculosis

    Ridiculosis (150)

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    Kerplunk Girl:
    Stand'in'the'rain!:
    Kerplunk Girl:
    Self harm comes in many forms because of many reasons, it's an issue that will never fade along with a lot of other issues.

    Either get yourself help, or someone else will.

    The simply thing is; you can get help.
    Yeah, that's true, but I think for some people it may be hard to believe.
    Yeah, I understand that, but as I said, if you can't get yourself help, someone else will.
    But there are a lot of different situations that make getting help hard, so people basically hurt themselves for long periods of time.
    Yes, very true.
    April 29th, 2007 at 01:07am
  • sullen riot.

    sullen riot. (100)

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    I used to SI. It was just... a kinda fucked up period in my life. I'm clean now, and I think it was more due to music / writing than any external, sort of "real" support. I think that SI ed and Support would be a great thing, honestly.
    May 5th, 2007 at 04:08pm
  • PRESIDENTDuckSaysMOO

    PRESIDENTDuckSaysMOO (100)

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    Ok, here's a little story...
    Get some popcorn, I don't know if it will be long =p

    Ok, we begin.
    Last August things happened which really upset me, alot. So one day I got this sharp, not cutting sharp, rod/stick thing and pushed down hard on my wrists. Sometimes it would bleed, sometimes it would just turn red and bumpy. It made me feel better, it made me feel happier. So everytime I felt bad, or angry, I would keep doing this. And I would do it all the way up my wrist.

    I marks would stay on for aslong as the next day. I would go into school with long red marks on my wrists which I tried covering. I felt ashamed going to school like that. I would keep doing it, when I woke up, when I had the urge, and one time my brother was in the room. But I kept doing it. It was a feeling of needing to hurt myself to feel alive. I just wanted another release.

    Then in September, I lost the thing I used to harm with and went literally mental for a few weeks. I would get really angry and scream if I couldn't find it. It was so hard being independent and away from my harmful 'comfort'. So I moved onto pins, scratching myself with them. Scissors, loads of things. Then I found the thing and continued with that. By now I had quite a few scars, and still do have a few.

    November 2006. I knew I had to do something. I couldn't keep on like this. I hated myself for doing it and needed help. So I made a promise to myself to quit by new years. It was hard, I have to admit. I went a bit insane again but slowly my sanity came back and I felt so much more confident with myself and happy.

    I quit on 31st December 2006.

    Feburary, I can even tell you what I wrote in my diary for this, this is a couple of days before aswell:
    I was tempted to cut because of that. I was gonna get a razor and do it. But I didn't. I've been cut free now for about a month. Nobody knows I have cut before. I hated the marks afterwards but it was a hard habit to beat. I don't want anyone to know that. It was a very dark time for me and I never want to go back there. It was very painful, but I don't want sympathy.

    I'm so fucking stupid, last night, I cut myself. With a pin badge, 5 times by my knee and 2 times with scissors. I'm bleeding. It hurts alot. I don't know why I did it, it felt better than crying. The pain felt good. I worked out November was the last time. I cut my other knee too. That was the first time since November, i'm just going to cut one last time with the scissors. That will be the last time I hope, i;ve given up once I can do it again.

    I did it again, I can see where this is headed...
    All my willpower down the drain...I feel so angry with myself for doing this again. I'm so ashamed.


    I cut four times after that. That was 3 weeks ago.I've stopped, for good. I will NEVER do it again.

    That was 4 times with a razor blade, it scared. Those entried where in March. So it's been two months.

    Please, next time you feel like getting a razorblade from a sharpener, don't. I've been there and done it. It never helped. I've even kept the razor as a reminder. Just promise me next time you do, get a diary, get a rubber band, a pillow, teddy, mate anything. I find connecting paper clips together real helpful. And the ice thing.

    It'll take time. You need to wean yourself off it and you will stop for good. Fuck, there's a razor blade downstairs, been there for a few weeks now, and i've not been tempted once to try it again. I think people need to be shocked into what can happen. I was shocked and i've stopped. I just need you to promise that you must help yourself first, you have to realise that before you can help someone else, you have to help yourself.

    It's no good in helping someone get off self-harming then the first thing you go and do is pick up that razor or whatever. Be selfish for once, help yourself. Talk, talk to someone or if not then write it down. Lie down and relax for a split second and if you can't take it while you're in school then look at your scars. Look at them and tell yourself.

    No, not tonight.

    And mean it.
    I want you to say outloud;
    "I won't let it happen again. I can beat this, i'm strong."

    I sound like a wierdo, I know. But say this everyday and mean it. Look at those scars and say it. Don't let yourself hurt anymore and throw away those blades.
    They don't need you and you don't fucking need them. You can survive it, it's not unbeatable, people.
    Most people on here I love to death and wouldn't want to see them get hurt...
    I just want to urge you people and tell you that you can get better.
    And toa ll of those that didn't know about this, i'm sorry it had to be this way. I just wanted to tell someone but help others in the same way.
    PM me if you need help or anything.
    Good luck x
    May 15th, 2007 at 01:20am
  • dreamboat.

    dreamboat. (100)

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    kayy. i started cutting in January.

    Stopped in Febuary.

    Started again in March.

    Stopped again after i started.

    Then in April, I did it three more times.

    then i stopped.

    my friends gave me looks...
    i promised Angel in January i wouldn't do it anymore.

    i broke the promise.

    my boyfriend at the time....he told all his friends his girlfriend was "emo"(ex boyfriend now)

    May: he broke up with me.

    i felt like cutting myself again.

    and i still do.

    and i hate myself for it.

    So far i've resisted the urge.

    then i think about my friends. and family.

    and i see the scars.

    which sucks.

    they stick out.
    and its not good.

    i hate myself for cutting.

    i hate myself in general..

    but then i think "this is the person im stuck being for...70 some odd more years."

    then i think about, when im older.

    My kids (if i have any) wont want to see scars on their mom's wrist.

    My husband/fiancee/boyfriend or whatever wont wanna see that on my wrist.

    Honestly, i know i might cut again.

    i KNOW i probably will.

    and if i try that hard.

    if i keep thinking what i think to keep my stop, i just might.
    When i was younger, i refused my mom point blank to see a therapist.

    and now, i really wish i hadn't.

    soo, please. I know this makes me sound hypocritical, but please, don't cut.

    try your hardest not to.

    and if you need to talk, pm me.
    i've heard from my friend's that I'm a great listener.
    xx
    Kaycie
    May 23rd, 2007 at 12:43am
  • Tre the Cool.

    Tre the Cool. (100)

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    K, I usually hate talking about this, but I know its best if you talk about it.

    Last year, something happened to me. This guy I really liked asked me out as a joke. It hit me really hard, and other stuff happened after it because of it. To make the story short, I was bullied. I was going crazy, and nobody would help me. My friends were on the bully's side, and I just couldnt take it anymore. I started scratching my wrists. My friends knew about it, and laughed. Nobody helped me or anything. Then, something happened and I did it right in front of my friend Jessica, in class. My friends Jessica and Chelsie were the only ones that tried to stop me. Chelsie threatened to never talk to me or even look at me ever again if I did it again. And Jessica just kept telling me not to do it because its bad, and it could get a lot worse.

    That was the last time I ever did it. Was that time in class.

    That was last June. And I only told my mom about it probably in February. She freaked out at first, cause she thought I actually did cut. But she knew that I was going through a lot of shit. I was actually going crazy and didn't know what to do with myself anymore.

    Now, I'm fine. I'm over everything that has happened. But it took a while to get over it. I'm never going to be the same because of it, but I know that I will never cut.

    I know this may sound sorta lame, but I think that Chelsie and Jess are my guardian angels. If it weren't for them, who knows what I would be doing right now. I thank them so much for what they did for me.

    So please, if you cut, stop. Because someone somewhere cares about you.
    May 23rd, 2007 at 12:57am
  • chester.

    chester. (350)

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    How do you know when you've stopped cutting, because people say they have stopped cutting and they havent. I thought i was good, things were starting to get better in my life, a whole 2 months without hardly even thinking about it and then BAM there i go back to exactly where i was before

    Its getting worse and harldy anyone knows that i self-injure (i did to for 2 years before i even told anyone) i didnt have any friends that i can talk to because there either messed up to and i have to try and help them or they would just turn around and call me emo and laugh. (yer im not 2 good on the friends front)

    Is there a trick or some way that helps stop it because i dont want to but i just cant not!
    May 23rd, 2007 at 01:22pm
  • the footloose doll.

    the footloose doll. (100)

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    heh, yeah. im like you.
    I thought I had stopped but....yeah.

    Any tricks? I'm not too sure.

    I guess try and substitute cutting with something non self destructing.
    Which can be tricky at times.

    It takes a lot of self discipline.

    Also, a friend of mine once said that it is a gradual process.
    Rather than stopping all of a sudden cold turkey
    You gradually lessen the amount in which you hurt yourself

    Sometimes i tell myself when i want to do it, to wait till the next day or next week or however long the time period be before I can allow myself to do it.
    If the desire to harm hasnt gone, I try and extend the time period.

    If you are willing to stop, you need to be hard on yourself.
    You wont always be happy, but in the long run you're doing yourself a favour.

    I posted a long-ish list of alternatives to self injuring on one of the prev pages.
    I've found they helped me a lot.
    May 24th, 2007 at 01:23pm
  • chester.

    chester. (350)

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    thanx
    xoxo
    May 24th, 2007 at 02:09pm