Funny School Moments

Basically, talk about really funny moments that have happened at school.

For me, Bio is always hilarious, and Mr Collins always has me in stitches xD
For example:

We had to list what happens to our body when we get cold.
Mr Collins: Do any of the boys notice they get boners when they're cold? Ben? Simon? Sam? Danielle?
Me: :lmfao :tehe: No sir xD

Also, in another lesson, he had two pots of beads, one with blue, one with brown, and he had to mix them up, to show that brown eyes are a dominant gene, and as he mixed them up, he made weird orgasm noise :lmfao "Now here's your parents having sex, making little babies -orgasms- And your grandparents -mixes beads & orgasms-" :lmfao

He's probably sex obsessed, but it makes me lol lmfao

Someone texted me during class; and I just randomly pressed random buttons, in hopes that it would stop vibrating, and all you can hear is, "ring, ring, ring," :lmfao I was calling the person that texted me.. It was funny, because it was right in the middle of this huge exam, and everyone just starts laughing! And I was calling this person, for a good, five minutes, because I couldn't find the off button, to stop calling the person, and meanwhile, the teachers that were in the classroom, were trying to figure out who was calling someone during the test. :lmfao

My Bio teacher wrote Orgasm on the board instead of Organism.
It was there all lesson

:lmfao

Hiro Nakamura.:

My Bio teacher wrote Orgasm on the board instead of Organism.
It was there all lesson

:lmfao

My mom does that. We'll be studying and she'll say orgasm instead of organism. And then when she gives me the definition to organism I always say orgasm. :file:

Science is always hilarious.
Mrs. Patten is Puerto Rican and she has a super weird accent.
Jordi and Chris are always mimicking her and they've only got caught like three times. XD.
And Javier is always saying, "Yeees." in a weird voice, between like everything Mrs. Patten said, and she said, "Do we care what Lukas's opinion is?" and everyone says, "No." Except Javier, just sitting there, saying, "Yeeeees." XD.
Oh, there's so much more.
Um, in language arts, Mrs. Strahan's class, we had to choose a sentence for her to write on the board from our books. And I was reading Breaking Dawn at the time...
Yaritza: I hate you.
And then someone else said something else kind of offensive.
Me: We have blood on hand.
*Everyone starts laughing their ass off including the teacher*
And last year, our math teacher was stupid and didn't teach us much of anything, but during his FCAT my phone rang. xD.
And before that,
We were in one of the computer labs.
And there was this huge cabinet and I snuck in it for part of class, then snuck out.
Right after, Casey snuck in it and got caught and got sent to ISS...XD.

I was in math and one kid was at the board doing a problem to the homework. He started totally doing it wrong and when everyone went out he just said, "oops, sorry. I'm on crack."
It was hilarious because my teacher is old and pretty conservative so he just sat there staring at the kid while we all cracked up in the background.

Well in science this really dumb kid that thinks he's smart (we'll call him Dave) ran into the school Trekkie (we'll call him Bill) when they were turning in tests.

Basically, Bill started swearing at Dave in Clingon (not sure if the spelling is correct) in the middle of the test.

Yesterday I was crying with laughter, something I've never done in my entire life.
Reason: I sat at the back of the Biol room because our teacher wasn't in. We were given a sheet on photosynthesis to do, even though we'd never done it at GCSE level before. The first diagram was a picture of a leaf, and you had to label the correct parts. Because we didn't know any of it, my friend Mike decided to label every label 'leaf' and then add on extra stuff. Like 'Slag' leaf, and leaf 'whore' that was quite funny. Then there was a fill in the gaps exercise and again, he had to make it dirty. I can't remember all the details, but I'll try to remember.
Energy for orgasms is collected from masturbating. Instead of...
Energy for photosynthesis is collected from sunlight.

And we had to make a word equation for something or other so this was his suggestion.
Carbon Dioxide + durex = Oxygen + Femmedom.
You might have had to be there, but I was absolutely DYING.
and another time we had a supply teacher who was going nuts and eventually shouted 'GET UP!', Mike decided to shout 'MOVE, BITCH!' at the top of his voice.
And YET ANOTHER. 'I had to mend my grandad's television the other day. He's 82, and he's still alive. Can you believe that?'
He's a funny guy. I love this forum :)

We had a sub once and she was yelling at us. And a guy from another period came up behind her and quacked like a duck.

My history teacher always sings and does Simpson impressions....he's funny. XD

Then today in 2nd period science when the class was at the bathrooms one of my friends ran back into the room and switched a dvd that they were suppose to watch with another. So when the teacher came back in she said Okay class we're going to watch a great little video real quick. And when she turned it on it was porn! He had switched the science vid with porn. When the teacher saw it she tried turning of the tv but it wouldn't so she finally got it off. But then she started crying and left for the rest of the day.
It was really funny cause later on just to add an extra laugh (I'm not into this stuff but I'd thought it would be funny)
Me: You saw porn?
Kayla: Yeah. [insert name here] put it on.
Me: Oh......was it good porn?
Kayla: eh...it was okay.
Like I said I'm not into that stuff. I just thought it'd be funny....and it was.

Okay here’s my funny moments but first you need to know:
Mr. M - A teacher from the middle school (3rd floor of my school (I'm in HS)
Mr. B - My earth science teacher
Mr. A - My PE teacher
Pat - A guy in my science and PE class
Guido - A guy in my science and PE class (Guido is his last name no one calls him by his first name)
Jordan - A girl in my science class
Tom - A guy in my science class

One day a teacher from the middle school comes down because he and my science teacher are football coaches and it goes like this.
*Mr. M walks in and says*
Mr. M: What are you learning about? The inner cores of the earth?
Mr. B: What? You can’t say intercourse in here.
Mr. M: I didn’t say intercourse, I said inner cores
Mr. B: Oh ok good this isn’t biology.

Then this happened in my friends science class she has the same teacher as me but we have it different blocks.
Mr. B: So what could the elevation of point C be?
Kid 1(That’s a girl): Between 61 and 69
*Class giggles*
Mr. B: Ahh be quiet you don't have an experience with that
kid 2 (that’s a guy): I have had plenty of experience with that.
My Teacher: No you haven’t
kid 2(That’s a guy): No really I have
Mr. B: oh really what’s HIS name?
Then in my class which was right after that and after lunch which was after my friend’s class people had told people about that in lunch so in my class it goes like this.
Mr. B: So what could the elevation of point C be?
Jordan: Between 61 and 69
Tom: OH i heard about that from the last class
Mr. B: Yea let’s not go there again

The other day when me and my friends were in PE, 1 of my friends was saying something about this guy who was a douche bag and my other friend heard juice in a bag and my teacher came over and was like "juice in a bag? Ya know that can be interpreted in many different ways" we just burst out laughing.

Then there’s my global teacher who brings up the topic of sex EVERY class, it’s really creepy.

Mr. B: "You can't be a little late, a little pregnant, or a little dead."
We were all had WTF?! expressions on our faces then for the next 10 minutes people were arguing with my teacher that you could be a little dead, very entertaining.

*Teacher from the middle school walks in*
*Mr. M and Mr. B talk for 10 minutes then Mr. M has to leave
Mr. M: "I have to go I think I have a class."
Mr. B: "You think?"
Mr. M: "Yea SSR (sustained silent reading). Do you guys have SSR down here?"
Class: "No"
Mr. M: "SSR is a gay class. It’s a homosexual reading class!"

*Mr. M still hasn't left (note both teachers are wearing a GTA shirt which stands for Greece Teachers Association)
Mr. M: "Yea didn't you know we're gay (we're referring to him and my teacher)."
Mr. B: "Yea that’s what GTA stands for Gay teacher alliance."
Mr. M: "But we're not gay together."
Mr. B: "Oh of course not."
*Mr. M finally leaves*

Mr. B: "Any of you pregnant? If you ever are come to me and I can help you."

Mr. B: *Asks question what would happen if the earth started rotation faster*
Kid 1: *Answers question* (one of the answers was it would be more oblate.)
Kid 2: *Having side conversation* (says something about ovulate.)
Mr. B: Ovulate?
Kid 2: Yea never mind.
Mr. B: Do you need the amnihook?

Mr. A: "Ouch! That almost hit my rump!" He said this with a gay lisp which he can do scarily good, and this happened when a foam ball went behind him and hit the wall just barely missing him today when we were playing speed ball.

Mr. B: "This magazine was published in 1969"
Guido: *raises hand and asks* "Mr. Bunting what year was it made again?"
Mr. B: "1969"
Guido: *laughs*
Mr. B: "Guido I was once 14 to ya know. (Mocking him (Guido) he says)Oh lets get Mr. Bunting to say 69 as many times as possible."
Guido and Joe: *Look at each other and laugh*
Mr. B: "Oh do you to guys having something going on together? Its ok we have a club for you two now (referring to the Gay- Straight Alliance),

Today in PE we were playing speed ball and for the last hour of class and Pat gets hit in the nuts.
Mr. A: "Oh there goes Pat taking one for the team. And let me tell you guys that is not a shot you wanna take very often."
Me and My friends are just standing there laughing our asses off.
10 minutes pass
*Guido gets hit in the face*
Mr. A: "Oh there goes Guido getting hit in the face. That shot right there probably cleared his sinuses."
Guido: "Yea it did."
5 minutes pass
*Guido gets hit AGAIN in the face.*
Mr. A: "there goes Guido getting hit again. Hopefully it'll do something for his face."
5 minutes pass again
*Guido gets yet AGAIN! In the face*
Mr. A: “Oh Guido gets hit again in the face, looks like his face is the target. We might as well play Guido ball instead."
10 minutes pass
*Guido gets hit in the nuts.*
Mr. A: "Oh now Guido’s taking the same shot for the team that Pat took earlier. It looks like Guido really is the target today folks."

hahaha my Science teacher is hilarious and he doesn't understand is inuendos...he told this guy Steven in my class to tuck in his shirt but he just stood there playing with his shirt, Mr. K said, Steven!! Stop playing with it and just tuck it in and come already!! We all started laughing so hard. Then we are starting on the sexual organs and everyone just giggles a lot it's hilarious to here my teacher say penis lol XP

Yesterday. :weird

There was a chewed up, spit out banana on the floor in the hallway. And some kid came walking by and stepped / kicked into it. Everyone started cracking up and he's like, "What, what?" and people told him and he flipped a nut. :tehe:

At the end of the school year people running nude lol

Not exactly funny, but more embarrassing.
We were in class, and suddenly a hornet came buzzing.
Everyone was pretty much freaking out,
but the teacher was like: "Ignore it."
I couldn't, because it was directly next to me.
I kept edging over to my other side,
where my BOY partner was sitting.
I ended up sitting on his lap to get as far away from the stupid hornet as possible.
Thank God he didn't react or anything.

We were rehearsing for a drama night at school and this one pair was doing "One Hand, One Heart" from West Side Story and at the end, they were supposed to either kiss or just hold each other, and our kooky drama teacher grabbed him in the middle of practice and he was shaking him and saying things like "Hold her like you love her!" "You can't live without her!" "Kiss her like she's the sexiest thing and be sweaty!" he was looking at him so intensly and while he was shaking him, the guy who played Tony popped a boner. I was sitting in the front low waiting to go on stage and I think we all pissed ourseleves!

I love when kids wear track pants and pop a stiffy.

Janille: Sir Lee, are you and Sir Camp best friends?
Sir Lee: Yes, we are.
Sir Camp: Oh, really? Kiss me!
Sir Lee: Alvin! I told you – not in public.

:lmfao

Okay, so this wasn't exactly a moment that I experienced myself, but, it's funny. So I'm sharing.

One of the biology teachers in the school is Mr. Keirn. He mumbles everything he says so it gets really difficult to pay attention or to understand what he's talking about. My friends, Kohl and Geo were in his classroom one day during one of Mr. Keirn's classes. Some girl said something completely stupid, and Mr. Keirn mumbled, "Stupid bitch" under his breath. XD

Oh, and my friend, Thomas just told me something funny.
During his biology class yesterday, his friend, Hannah said, "I want to go to bed" and Mr. Keirn took it in a really perverted manner. Then she said, "I just want to have fun" and he had to walk away.

XD

Ah! This was so funny -

In Maths when I was at school, our teacher was talking us though an example on the board, and she was using a paperclip in te example.

She says, "Here we have a giant paperclit. I mean, paperclip! PAPERCLIP!"

But it was too late, we were all crying with laughter!

*

Science teacher: A black hole is a vey interesting thing. When you get near a black hole, time slows down. When you get inside the black hole, time stops completley.
Me: This school is like a black hole, then!
Science teacher: Why?
Me: You get close, time slows. You get in, time stops!
Science teacher: I'll drink to that! *looks around himself* *can't find bottle of water, so raises a beaker of hydrochloric acid instead*

*

*learning about genetics with our bald Science teacher*
Science teacher: We're going to answer such questions as, if my mother has brown hair and my father has blond hair, how come I have -
Me: No hair?

This actually wasn't at my school, but my friends. She told me this happened and I found it extremely funny
Her music teacher went out of the classroom for five minutes and her entire class went and hid in the cupboards, I have no idea how.
She came back and the classroom was empty :D

History teacher talknig to 16-18 year olds

"He involved ladies of the court in orgies, if you don't know what one of those is, ask your parents, they might show... EXPLAIN it to you"

:XD