It's always me when it suits you isnt it? When the shoe is on the other foot, its always so much more relevant and I am just supposed to listen and console. But you know that I can't turn you away ... I want to, like I've never wanted to stop wanting something before, but I just can't. She broke me. And now I feel like its her turn to feel what I felt. Thye final retributiin.I don't know what I am...

Things have been a little weird for me recently. My friend from school, Amy, of whom i used to be incredibly close to, recently just came to live with me because of family issues. I daren't go into them, as they are for her to discuss but nothing will change between them. So, anyway, she lived with me for a while until she found a place of her own and was able to stand on her own two feet again....

I find it so very hard to believe that an administrative office in a care company can be so fucking shit at their jobs. Honestly, I think my arse would do a better job. It talks more fucking sense.My mum is terminally disabled and she relies on my father, me and the carers, just so she has a better quality of life - if you can call it a quality of life that is. Anyway, I would divulge the entire...

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse … I find not only am I clinically depressed and just about had enough, but my dad is exactly the same – well I kinda expected it, he is the primary carer of his terminally ill wife “/. But to top it all off, we may not have a home in under six months. We have 30 grand to pay off on the mortgage and if we cant pay that off, then the house...

Well, here I am again … sitting at a computer desk, drowning my sorrows into a blank screen, submitting a journal entry that probably no one will take notice of. But this isn’t about people taking notice; it’s just about airing my views. I never used to be the person I have become today – I used to be happy, joyful and look at the positive things in life. But now it seems, suddenly so,...

Okay so i am amidst all my school exams and now i am like finally realising that it will all be over soon. Had a really f**king hard one today and yes sarah i do mean an exam lmao ;)But yeah my next exam is on friday so hopefully that will be alright too. For nows anyway imma just gonna relax and wait it out and enjoy it cause i dont want it to be over haha :)Anyway next year is college and i have...

So its my last week of school this week, I leave on Thurs and tbh i cant wait for it and i also dont want it to come. I dont wanna have to wake up every morning and suddenly realise crap no school and i know that sounds weird cause what must i do on holidays right?But its different. Somehow.I am not leaving my school completely cause if i can sort it out round my timetable at college then i can...

OK school is nearly over now and i actually really cant wait .. but there's another part of me that doesnt wanna leave.I'm sure that this phase (if hats what it is) will pass, cause for some reason, it has been making really upset. I suppose its the fact that i will probs never see a lot of my friends anymore. Maybe.Or maybe its the fact that I am gonna miss the school itself (something i would...

I can't express how confused i am at the moment. One minute you say you want me, the next you don't even wanna know me, and then later on you asking me if I wanna do something tomorrow night. If I have done something wrong, please tell me so i can do something about it. I do care about you but I dunno how much more of this i can take; it is almost like you are using me, but I know you would never...

Got back from holiday on Saturday and I had such a good time. Just me dad and me bro and we had such a good time. I bought a big blue ball and we were like chucking it around in the caravan and we smashed a glass lmao but the glass must have been a really shit one cause it shattered to pieces and I also bought another orange monkey which I can now add to my ginger monkey family. Anyways school on...

Back at school soon.... I am both excited about that and a little sad too but I am excited mostly. Going on hols tomorrow so probs won't be posting for a week unless we take the laptop with us. I am so excited about that too. It seems like ages that I have been waiting for this holiday and it has finally come.Also went out with Leia today. It was amazing!!! I haven't had that much fun in a long...

OMG today was so funny. I stayed over my mate's house last night, woke up and just mucked around as usual. I am so childish when I am with my friends. Anyway after I came home, my friend Saffron popped over and then we decided that we would go into town to meet her mummy in the pub (come restaurant), The Moon on the Square. I was supposed to have dinner with daddy but I had a better offer lol. I...

Well ... today was quite fun actually. My friend, Liam stayed over last night and when we got up and ready, we decided to go swimming. Normally I love to swim, but i hadn't had any breakfast this morning so i was a little hungry when i got in... Woops! But it was fun anyway, I ran (or should i say swam rofl) into some school mates and we had a giggle.Anyway, a week on saturday is when I go to...

Today was truly awesome. I went to see Leia again today and you know what it was sooooooooooo nice. I really like her you know and I hope that I don't f**k it up like last time but i won't go into that. Anyway we went into town and then basically just hung out and it was surprisingly fun.Tomorrow my friend is gonna stay over and we are probably gonna go swimming on wednesday, which i am really...

Tonight was fooking amazing. Went Quays behind festival leisure and it was carribean night. The bbq was immense and the singer, Angelo Stars was on fire with his percussionist, Skims. Had a lil dance and sing song and was overall a really good night.I also went out with leia today. It was great and I really loved spendiong my time with her. She is great company but i guess i learned that before we...

Its ten to one in the morning and just got in from a party about half an hour ago. It was pretty shit although the singing was pretty good lol. We started in the restaurant 'The Quays' (pronounced keys) and sat down had a meal, it was open mic night so some of the singing was pretty good but then others... well let's not go there.OMG I am so effing hungry, as always, but we have nothing in and...

My nan and granddad came down today from shropshire to see my mother today. They have to come a very long way to see us so they obviously love us. I was supposed to go and play tennis today with my friend Saffron but she cancelled because she isn't feeling too well. Personally, I think that she has swine flu as she didn't sound very good whilst I was talking to her on the phone just this morning....

It was my last day in year ten today. It's so sad, my science teacher is leaving, actually, come to think of it lots of teachers are leaving. Well at least I have the holidays to look forward to!I am really going to miss school, I love being there with my friends and speaking languages, playing music. I already know that I want to go to college but I am uncertain of what career path I shall or...

Feeling incredibly ill today! Could I have swine flu? I certainly hope not. But hey hoh, what do you know, there are a lot of things that I can control and becoming ill is not one of them. Daddy keft me to deal with it though although I do not blame him. He has to work otherwise we don't get any money. And it's not like mummy can help really. And well I won't even begin to explain James. He seems...