namewasalreadytaken / Comments

Uh yeah, just a little too early. lol
I dunno. To me, being 19 is a whole different kind of thing than being a teenager or least a younger one. At least as a teenager, everyone was kind of working towards the same goal: "We're all in high school and we're trying to graduate!" After graduation, it's kind of a different thing. Everyone has different things going on and it's confusing because some of the people I graduated with are married and some even have babies. Others are working. Several are going to school. It's like, "Okay, so what am I going to do?"

lol that's good!

haha too late! Already did it.

lol I have two emails. One of them is one I made when I was like 9 or something for neopets and the other I used make myself older for myspace back when that was a thing. The one for myspace was just basically my full name so I use that for like official stuff like my FAFSA, school, and etc.
The other one is for like everything else. That's where gaia emails me all the time. lol I get soo many food coupons there because my dad gets excited about coupons. I even have a roadhouse app that sends me an offer whenever I'm close to one of their restaurants which became a problem whenever I realized how close my best friend lives to the restaurant.
I get excited about the Bath and Body Works stuff though. Pretty sure I'm obsessed with good smelling lotion and body spray. It's a problem. lol
lol might have been a good description of how I was. I just had a friend who was like, "Hey, you like websites? Here's a lot of them! Let's be apart of them!" That's how I found not only mibba, but gaia too. lol
Maybe lol I went from like neopets to quizilla to quibblo to some Naruto RP site to some kind of monster RP site to mibba to gaia to youtube and then I guess felt satisfied with the websites I was already apart of. A lot of those I don't even know the password or anything to anymore.

I didn't think of it that way, but that makes sense. The smallest things bother me and I think it kind of has to do with my expectations I have for myself. Plus I don't think having a psychologist that lies to you is all that helpful and I do want to be some kind of psychologist. lol
I'm pretty sure I say thank you more than I apologize honestly. I remember reading about a study that said women apologize more than men though. So maybe it might not seem like a lot to me, but it could seem like a lot to you. lol

Yeah, I think it bothers us because on the inside we're like, "But we've changed! I've learned my lesson."

Well, I did tell you I was a unicorn, but I mean...there's no way you'd know if that's a lie or not. lol
If you mention something I lied about, I'll let you know. lol but no I didn't really lie all that much. Me from the past wasn't as much of a little shit as I thought. lol

Yes! It's an official title. All that matters is that it sounds cool. lol
I don't usually stay really good friends with people for very long. lol It's rare. Yup, that's it! :P

The fact that they both strutted through the house with the scarves and showed my grandma...it was just a little concerning. lol
Yes, I can type with two hands! Thanks!
Drugs can effect people in different ways i guess.

Who knows? I think my version sounded a little more depressing because I was picturing confused and frustrated ghosts.

I am very good at answering my own questions. :P

I was thinking of telling them I was viking. lol
Is it a lie if I buy a viking sword and a viking helmet? xD
Me too. I hate decisions. Especially when my first choice doesn't work out for me.

Class? Sounds so exciting. lol
You totally should! Get those ideas in your ideas out of your head and onto paper...well I guess it's digital paper.
I've been thinking about doing that as well, but I've been in one of those moods where I just don't know what I want to do. Nothing sounds fun to me. I usually like reading, writing, playing video games, watching stuff, but I've just been meh lately. None of it sounds good enough, but I have no idea what would be. I don't know if I'm making sense, it's just a meh feeling. I didn't even want to get out of bed today. I'm just not content. Its a strange feeling. I'm hoping it will pass. Dx

Thank you! Yeah, you were about two days late, but that's okay! I mean I did give you a 26 day head start and you almost made it. So should I give you like a month in advance next year so you'll be on time? lol
It's really weird to see 19 under my username now. It's like I'm that close to being 20 years old? No way dude. I don't feel like it. but there's also a part of me that's like, "Man, I've been a teenager for way too long anyways. Let's stop being a teenager."

You have a legit excuse. I forgive you. lol

Yeah, I'll replace the picture in like 10 days though just you watch. lol

It was such a long time ago. Dear lord, I still get emails from gaia, but I don't remember my passwords and stuff for it. I move from website to website a lot so its hard to keep up with usernames and passwords.
I think I apologized more for myself than you then because you really don't care. lol That and I'm usually a pretty honest person so it bothers me whenever I think about how much I used to lie. I think that has a lot to do with being a teenager. We have grown up to be even stranger adults. Omg if I was a kid, I wouldn't have to worry about college anymore. Do you think I can pass for like twelve or no? xD I don't wanna be an adult.
But for the record (that's more so I feel better lol), the following things are true: My gender, age, and name are all true. My parents being divorced and my disagreements with my mother are all true. I have one little brother whom is strange. I may have said I had an older brother, but we had a strange arrangement where some of my family had considered adopting cousins and stuff so that's where that came from. It was just easier to explain in general although is still technically a lie. lol It didn't work out obviously. And he's not around much anymore anyhow so I am the oldest child officially.
Because of that arrangement though I now "technically" have a 7 year old uncle with anger management problems so that's interesting. lol

Yeah, dude! Now I'm a super mega awesome friend! It's an upgrade. lol
But it's okay since I'm a super mega awesome friend I forgive you and all is well. Right?

Whoo! Friends! *insert fist pump here*
I've known you longer than a lot of my friends actually. A lot longer than my current best friend. I've known one of my really good friends since 2nd grade so not the oldest one. I'm not quite that bad at keeping friends.

My dad and brother did a fashion show with the scarves for me too. It was a scarring experience really.
After seeing them model the scarves nobody will want to remember. lol I no longer need the scarf though. My cast thing is off, the stitches are out, and I now have a tiny scar.
Perhaps. I mean I really like reading too, but the drugs they put you on don't really make you feel like reading tbh.
Yes! Well, I like to think that they can control it at will, but I really think if ghosts were in the right state of mind, they wouldn't be ghosts. I think they're confused like constantly because they don't know where the afterlife is so they're just mindlessly searching.

You don't mind the drug induced ramblings of a strange teenager girl? lol Actually with that description, I sound interesting. lol

I am somewhat well. Everything with the surgery went well and I've got a scar that'll probably look cool.
I've recently withdrew from the college I was going to because I lost my scholarship and I wouldn't be able to pay for the school without it. So that kind of sucks. I only owe 2,000 dollars in loans though so that's good.
I didn't like being stuck in a small town college though so I'm not too bad. Now I'm just stressing about what I'm going to do with life right now, but I think that's a normal thing people around my age deal with.
How about yourself?

Yess. That's the picture I sent to my grandma to show her how I was feeling cause typing is a hassle. I actually have keep my arm up like that while standing and walking. lol I'm very proud of that picture actually. I had no hair products in my hair, it air dried like that, it was freezing outside, I had no make up on,I was at a hospital for most of the day, had surgery, went home: ate and slept. And when I woke up I took that picture. Haha you might not understand why I am in complete awe of the picture. lol Its just been a long time since I was happy with a no makeup picture. I'm sure there's a lot of self image problems in there, but I've gotten a lot better with that stuff.

Actually you can probably tell if you think back to how I was when you first started talking to me on Gaia when I was...12 or 13? I don't remember. All I remember was that I was sad a lot and liked to lie to just about anyone about anything because "it's the internet!" I'm too old, tired, and lazy to be upset all the time like I was and lie like that anymore. lol Also, if I lied to you, I'm not sure if I did. Consider this a formal apology for my lying 14 year old self, okay? I was having a rough time and at those ages I was a little shit who was waaay too excited about the internet. I'm probably such a nerd for apologizing for lying when I was like 14 on the internet, but oh well. I'll probably becoming up with stupid things I lied about later so I'll let you know if I think of one I might have told you. I'll feel like a really bad friend if I don't. lol And no matter what you say we're friends. You can't escape now. lol jk
I'm assuming we are though. We've talked to each other for too long not be tbh. xD I'm sure I've talked about things that you probably would have preferred not knowing about me. lol

I'm using a scarf as a sling now. lol I'm turning it into a fashion statement. My dad is wearing one of my scarves and so is my brother. They got into an argument about whos prettier. lol
Well they were comparing everyones charts and I was like, "Make him or me leave pleeaassse." and I was actually the next one out. The dude was like, "I need my book then," right before I left. He soon joined me in the next room too, but he was quiet because he had his book though I don't know how he could stand to read after surgery.
I mean I don't think ghosts would be that strong if they could even touch you because they might not have a lot of energy especially if they're dead for a long time, but idk we need a ghost expert for that. lol
Also it's 26 days until my birthday! :D 19 isn't really all that exciting of an age actually. I don't think I get any special privileges.

Sorry, I rambled a lot. I'm tired and I'm taking narcotics for my arm. lol

lol I'm trying to recover from wrist surgery right now. They didn't give me a sling so its hard to keep it elevated like the doctors want. I came out of my surgery at 6pm, starving because I had been told not to eat after 12am. My surgery was supposed to start at 2pm, but they ran late so I had it at like around 4pm.
I told this guy in the room where you wake up from the anesthesia (I'm typing with one arm, not spell checking right now lol) to shut up because he wouldn't stop asking when he could go home. He was farther away from so he probably didn't hear me, but after the 10th time he said it I was hoping they would take me away soon. lol
Yes, nothing is definitely better than something in those situatons.
If its me, I hate being scared so I respond that way.
Well its easier to make friends if you don't kill the person-whom-you-are-trying-to-become-friends-with's friends. :P It's also hard to be friends with nonphysical beings. lol

I've slept so much during this break. It's amazing.
The guy said he wasn't worried about the metal in my clothes. When I did it the first time they gave me stuff to put on, but this guy said he was just worried about my glasses and any jewelry I had on. I got my results back from the MRI today and the doctor didn't say anything about it so I guess it was fine. Just gave me a heart attack is all.
It's funny because the MRI operator dude said if I felt like something was wrong or anything that I just needed to kick my feet and I was sitting there like, "Is a mysterious ghost person touching my back something I need to kick my feet over? What if it's a friendly ghost trying to get my attention?"

You can. lol but sleep is so nice.
Yeah, I've had enough doctor appointments this year. I don't really care for them.
Well, I've had two MRI. You get put in a tiny tube with ear plugs and loud noises going on around you. You have to sit still as possible for 30 minutes. You can feel your muscles contracting after a while. It's strange. This time I got scared because I was on my stomach laying there with my eyes closed and I felt something touch my back. And I was like, "Holy shit. This MRI is haunted and I'm getting touched by a ghost. What the fuck, " but then I realized it was probably the magnetic field picking up the metal part of my bra strap. Dx
Yess, that magnetic field part is true. They have a whole bunch of questions and stuff about metal things in your body. Like you can't have a pacemaker apparently.

True.

I finished mine a week ago so I've gotten plenty of sleep don't you worry. lol
Yay for finally finishing finals!
I actually had to get out of bed for a doctor appt today. lol They wanted an MRI to see how they're going to remove this cyst on my wrist. MRI's are scary. lol

Idk. I haven't played multiplayer before. All I know is that it's usually right after they release the game or it's Uplay acting up.

I'm pretty good. Just finished my finals yesterday and I'm kind of happy to be home. Finals stressed me out and I lost a lot of sleep just being stressed about them and other things.
How about yourself?

For sure. Maybe when the new semester starts.

Eh, the multiplayer on the games doesn't always work out well anyways. I've heard people had a lot of problems with the multiplayer servers.
lol they sure are!

That's what I think too. Either way I failed at being a procrastinator or I went too far as being a procrastinator.

True! I'm willing to wait for it!

lol most of the AC games have multiplayer too so does their relatedness go up?
I feel like I tend to like the games where autonomy is first priority in the game, with the story and such. It might be why I don't like bioshock, the story seems like a secondary kind of thing sometimes.
Well, if you had friends or wanted to make friends that weren't video games, then maybe you'd care more about relatedness. xP

Well, it was due at 5pm so I kind of turned it in late.

Yeah, I heard something about that too. I thought it was like late 2015 or something idk.

All parts are pretty cool and important, but whatever you like better kind of dictates what games you'll like.

Too late. It's already finished. I finished it at 5pm. xD

lol I can't think of a good pun or else I would have used it. :P

I won't be watching the next season of Blue Exorcist I think because I feel like it's already finished, but I'll be watching the next season of Attack on Titan whenever that decides to come out.

Sounds right to me!
I enjoy multiplayer stuff, but I mostly play video games by myself. It's something fun I can do by myself.

Whoo! Acronyms!

Noooo. I've got a 9:30am class. I'm not that big of a procrastinator.
Good, I'd throw you out the window for that too. :P

It would be such a cute book.
Oh, it could also be kind of a riddle. Like, "how does this girl have all the stars in the sky?" and theres some absurdly clever answer. IDK

I can see how Advancing Giants wouldn't be all that exciting of a title. I mean when I think of titans I think of greek mythology and the titans sounded somewhat similar to the idea of titans in the anime.
Yeah, I usually wait for reviews and stuff because the second season might not be that good and I don't really wanna waste my time with it.

Whoo! Highfive! :P
Well, some people don't play games for a story. I don't know why else they play them, but I know not all games have decent stories. I played skyrim purely because I liked the story with everything.

Yeah, I'm getting pretty bad with my procrastination especially on essays. I have one due tomorrow and it's supposed to be five pages and I barely have one. Dx

Philosophical isn't a bad thing!
And it could be a children's book!

My friend looked up the anime while she was hanging out with me and she spoiled somethings for herself and me so I should probably just go ahead and read the manga. lol Is the english translation of the name not the same really? I haven't looked into it.
Haha I love the cliffhanger and hate it at the same time. I love Annie's character too much to hate it. She is so smart and resourceful.
I think Blue Exorcist is going to have a new season or has one, but it's not about the main character anymore so I'm like, "It's over. Idc. He defeated Satan, we're done here." lol
Yeah playing for completion isn't really all that fun for a game like this. It has some backtracking and you die so many freaking times, I couldn't play it for long amounts of time because I was so frustrated with dying and some of the jumpscares when enemies pop up.
I have some of the save files for my other games because they came with "steam cloud" so that steam saves my game files.
EXACTLY. THERE'S NO POINT IN HAVING THE GAME UNLESS YOU COMPLETE IT.
I'm a big story driven game person so I really just need to know about the story now. Like I still have no idea why everything is all fucked up in Bioshock. At this point, I just need more of the story.

Best proofreader ever. :P
I guess, but I'm so tired of writing essays. I am so close to the end of this semester, but there's so much work to be done still and a lot of it is essays. Dx
Ar matey!

Now it sounds all philosophical.

If video games are my friends then I have a lot of them. lol

Yeah, I know what you're talking about. lol
Uh, I think the more recent ones I've watched is Blue Exorcist and Attack on Titan. Blue Exorcist was really good. I liked theme songs and it was interesting in general. I watched Attack on Titan a while back and I'm just waiting for the next season of that.
lol I broke my computer so I had to get a new one so all my save files for bioshock are gone. That game is so irritating to replay, I swear to god. So I'm not enjoying it nearly as much now since I'm replaying it. But now since I started the story, I wanna finish it.

Of course. They just need proof of your proofreading skills which usually consists of writing. I mean I could give them my essays because honestly they're like perfectly proofread by me, but I don't really even like my essays. I literally turned in the essay I was talking about the other day that I hated with a passion and I thought it was terrible, but my teacher was like, "We're good here. Nicely done overall," and he gave me an almost perfect score (which I would have gotten if I didn't turn it in late). He's a pretty harsh grader so I was surprised. My proofreading is fantastic, but my content? Not so much. xP
Well, you could always play dumb and be like, "You mean that movie pirate...uh...Captain Jack Sparrow? No I don't see any of those pirates around here!"

Well, I would, but I'm likely to never finish it and I'm not really into space stories. xP The only thing I even remember being into that had anything to do with space was like the Justice League tv show and the Teen Titans tv show. They weren't really all about that so they really don't count. xD
But it'd be an interesting story if the right person wrote it.

Oh, yeah. Billy's there! As long as he's there you're not entirely friendless. And video games are kind of your friends, right? xP

Best idea ever. But I don't think I could turn it in for a grade, but it's the best way to get rid of other people. "Here's my essay about how you need to leave me alone about all this stuff." I'll be sure to break out the essay for special occasions like Christmas and Thanksgiving.
That's a lot of pages. Dx
I'll probably play bioshock because that's the most recent game I've bought. It's not really my type of game, but I like it nonetheless.

Of course. Writers have proofreaders for a reason. lol
Proofreaders do help point out plot holes and stuff so they have a little to do with the whole writing down the ideas part. They're sometimes the people who point out why something doesn't work, but that could also be an editor kind of job though too. I'm not all that familiar with how the whole writing and editing thing works though.
How does your imaginary friend have money to buy a video game? xD

It sounds kind of like a girl who collects stars in outer space and goes on space adventures. lol

You make it sound like you just sit in your room, being lonely and friendless. I get a sad little mental picture. x]
I was just giving you the reasons the college gave me. xP Making friends is overrated. I only do it because I won't get shit from my family about it when I visit them on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Now, they'll only bother me about getting boyfriend, getting married, having kids, blah blah blah. Other things I don't want to deal with right now.
I mean I also make friends for other reasons, but my family cares about my life way too much.

Ah yes, the bathroom adventures of Princess Foot-in-the-sink and Moaning Myrtle will be the best essay ever. But really, freshman girls only bathrooms are probably the scariest thing ever.
Sounds like not a lot of fun.

Well, that's true. Everyone of my friends that likes to write who have let me read what they write beforehand was a terrible proofreader actually. lol But that's just my experience.
The first few should be on a discount by now. On steam they have sales like all the time, and they recently had an AC sale too. The games were like 8 dollars or something.

Yesss. My parents will be so proud. I'll be known forever as the girl with all the stars.

Well, it's helpful to have friends on campus so they'll support you and they'll give you more a reason to stay in college lol which is what the college wants.

Oh, nothing much. Working on an essay about the weird people in my dorm after I just got back from a Psychology club meeting. I just enrolled for my spring semester here before I left for the club meeting. So I've got my spring schedule. What about you?

Yes! I'm sure some authors are like that too.
I'm sure there are plenty of writers that need proofreaders, but wouldn't they need to read stuff I wrote to make sure I'm like a legit proofreader? Like I said, I haven't wrote anything in a while for myself so I wouldn't have anything to give them.
Yes, that's basically the whole game for me. Running up walls that weren't climbable. lol And I was really shitty at the horse riding. My roommate also says that I seem to find all the glitches in every assassins creed game. With Altair I would use "gentle push" on people standing still and it would glitch out his arm. I spent like 10 minutes laughing at it.
I would also GET mad because I would get in trouble for being on the roofs in like any AC game and I'm always like, "WHY CAN'T I JUST WALK ON THE ROOFS! Maybe I just want a nice, relaxing walk on the roof and you guys are just rude."
Yesss. They're a better game series than I thought they would be.

Oh yeah, I can't let an alien beat me at having all the gold stars!
Oh yeaaaah! "Here's a gold star to persuade you!"

Maybe.
It's not hard, it's just irritating. It just gives us a lot of work and it like requires to go do stuff on campus and it gets pretty annoying. They're like forcing us to socialize and it's pretty stupid in my opinion.

Yeah. Well, yes it is kind of obvious. lol
Well, I haven't lived with her in a while anyway, but yeah.

yaaaay? lol yeah I get to look forward to that. Sounds like lots of funnn.
Yes, I'm sure it was. It was just what I thought about whenever I saw that.
Yes, it is! :P

I'll have bursts of inspiration and I'll just write a lot, but it'll be like years before I'll even type out anything I'll write for myself. I guess it depends on your definition of writer I guess. I enjoy writing, but I enjoy reading more than I do writing. Hell, I like proofreading a lot actually.
Then you kind of get the idea of it. Altair is one my favorite characters, but I got mad at the controls a lot. AC2, Brotherhood, and Revelations are all about Ezio and they're really good games. I just kept getting irritated because Ezio would always flirt with and save women and I hated those missions. AC unity is coming out next month and I'm so excited, it looks so cool. Well, I'm just saying it's probably worth the money if you ever think about getting a video game or something. lol
I probably wouldn't use the 3DS much for anything else besides that so it wouldn't be worth it for me to buy it.

I'll have the world record for most gold stars. lol
Probably. We have some issues we need to work out. Her boyfriend might be a problem too. xD

Differences in colleges. My college requires freshman to take a class they made up for us to succeed in college. It's kind of a waste of money in my opinion. They taught me stuff I would have probably figured out, but it's nice to have people to ask questions to and stuff and I've made friends so I guess it's okay.

Right, but you're also my friend so you're more inclined to agree with me anyway. :P
That's really what I believe, but people get mad when I say "You don't know her like I do" so I've given up trying to explain. It's a lot different having her as a mother than them having her as a friend. I have to deal with her emotion baggage more and I have to be there when times are tough because it'll effect me too. They can come and go when they please. I don't get that luxury.

I've already planned to get my Master's degree, maybe a Doctorate so that's already out. lol I'm majoring in Psychology and my minor is Criminal Studies. There's not much I can do with a Bachelor degree in psych or at least nothing I want to pursue.
lol I don't know if you've played Portal 2, but this guy called Cave Johnson has a monologue about lemons. He yells about getting mad, and throwing the lemons back and burning life's house down with the lemons. What you said reminded me of that lol.
But yes, confuse everyone with lemons!