I find that I have a hard time accepting gifts. Or rather, I should amend that. I have a hard time accepting that people want to give me a gift. I always feel as though I don't deserve them, no matter what the gift is, and that by accepting the gift I'm doing something wrong. Even on tradition gift-giving days, such as birthdays or December holidays.I have absolutely no idea why this is. o.O; But,...

Someone told me that Samson was a great man yesterday. Or maybe the day before. Whatever. I couldn't quite remember the story so today I took out my NIV version of the Bible and found it. It's in the OT in the Book of Judges and chronicled his life from the circumstances surrounding his miraculous conception to his death.I have no idea why anyone would call him a great man. He was an awful...

This season I think about my extended immediate family. I know, that sounds weird right? Well not if you knew how I grew up. I come from a broken home and all of my siblings and my biological father lived elsewhere when I was growing up. I saw my siblings once a year, and didn't realize that I had a half brother (who is very sweet, btw) until I was probably around nine or 10. My siblings never...

Apparently, there is a ridiculous Page going around that people are Liking on Facebook where they confuse what faith is. Even without using the word. It goes something like this:Teacher: Can you see God?Class: No.Teacher: Can you touch God?Class: No.Teacher: Then there isn't a God!Student: Sir, can you see your brain?Teacher: No.Student: Can you touch your brain?Teacher: No.Student: So are you...

Memorial Day is coming up at the end of this month. As a result, I'm spending a lot of time thinking about my grandpa (he was a veteran). Blog entries and pulses might frequently show up about him throughout the month, as a result. He was very important to me and I miss him very much. He was able to chase anything bad or frightening away, completely. And when I say completely, I mean that all he...

I just realized that Memorial Day is coming up this month. It'll be on the 30th, as that's the last Monday of the month. I wish that I'd have a place to lay flowers for my grandpa. I'll probably do a few tributes to him on that day. Which will probably consist of selecting a song appropriate for him and the day, and writing a poem for him. Its possible that I'll write a blog entry specifically...

When I was a child, in fact I believe it was first or second grade -- I get the two mixed up, because I had the same teacher and mostly the same classmates both years -- I discovered my penchant for seeking revenge.You see, one day during the chaos that was the clean-up after an indoor recess, I got underneath a table and used a magenta crayon (my favorite color at the time) to write another...

This is another dream featuring my grandfather.I was getting some kind of chocolate-filled pastry out of the kitchen closet. It was long, thin, and flakey, and I was eating it as I went into the living room and sat down in a chair.Steve sat down in the chair next to mine. He had one filled with white creme of some sort. He grinned at me and we had a very short conversation."I got one of these,...

When I was younger, back when grandma was still living in the house with us -- but after she'd already had the stroke -- that I was having a conversation with my grandfather. He was sitting in the kitchen in the chair he always sat in if he was in the kitchen, and I was standing in the doorway leaning against the open doorjamb. Our kitchen doesn't have doors. Just an open doorway.Anyway, I...

When I was a kid I used to hate school. I hated it with a desperate passion that glowed white-hot. More than your average kid. It got really bad from the time I hit 5th grade until around the middle of my 8th grade year.I would fake sick. I would make myself sick. I would cry and beg -- if all else failed -- to be allowed to stay home. I got myself into trouble. I got my mom into trouble. I...

Logic says you shouldn't believe in something until there is proof it exists. This is good advice. But what is the proof needed? Is it the same for everyone, or different? All things considered, I feel the burden of proof is different as dependent on whom you speak to. There are things I want to believe in. It would be so much easier, life in general, if I could put logic aside and just blindly...

I've noticed that a lot of people like to take online quizzes. I've also noticed that a lot of people take the results of these quizzes to heart. Which is bizarre, if you ask me. Most of these quizzes insult you while lying to you about how their insult is awesome or sexy or cute, and get away with it by sugar-coating what they say. For example, I saw this on a friend's Facebook page, a result...

Well, we blew (another) fuse in the house. This time it wasn't the same one that usually blows. Steve changed the fuse and then taught me what to do in case that ever happens and he's not around the house to change them. I also now know how to check to see if the fuses are good on a meter, and where the meters are located in the utility room.Its actually surprisingly all very easy. o.o; I'm...

Looking through some junk, I noticed an old partially used notepad and wondered why I still had it. Then I flipped through it and realized why. When my grandpa was in the hospital, he couldn't talk. So, he would try to write down what he wanted to say. A lot of his initial attempts are in that notebook. This makes me feel sad and nostalgic. I'm glad he is no longer in any pain and is, one way or...

I'm so sick of the lies going around Missouri right now about Proposition B. Most people who advocate repeal (talking citizens here) want it done for reasons that have nothing to do with the bill. They've been lied to and they perpetuate the misinformation. Obviously, there are special interests at work, of course. No surprise there. Missouri is known as the puppy mill capital of the United...

Its normal in any country for the politicians and other leadership to be unable to satisfy all of the people all of the time. That's something that can't be got away from. And that means there will always be civil and/or political unrest of some sort. That's normal. That's healthy for a nation.However, what isn't healthy for a nation is the way that our politicians and our citizens, especially (at...

I just wanted to pass along a petition! I know, I know. Another one! Lol, sorry!The petition is sparked by a post on Marie Claire's website. It's beyond ridiculous, entitled: Should "Fatties" Get a Room? (Even on TV?). And as you can probably assume already, it's very anti-overweight. Just take a look at exactly what this woman, Maura Kelly, has to say. It's the most jaw-dropping ridiculousness...

Why do all of my memories have to end up being bittersweet? Is this really what people have to look forward to all of their lives? A lifetime of staring out the window and remember what used to be and what could have been?What kind of life is that to live? Strikes me as a bit more than pathetic. Perhaps it wouldn't, if we weren't constantly force-fed hopey-feely philosophical silliness. After all,...

Why is it so necessary for otherwise nice and thoughtful people to lie to those whom are supposed to be their friends?I suppose they feel like it's kinder. But, it isn't. I usually know when they're doing it. I just hardly ever call them on it. It does no good. Either they deny it or they try to justify it. Which makes it worse.Maybe they feel it's a white lie and nicer than the actual truth....

I remember very clearly the day grandpa left n August of 2008 to go to the hospital. He was only going for 3 days. Or, at least that's how long it was supposed to be.I wasn't feeling well that day. For once I forgot to hug him goodbye. I thought of it. Really, I did. But, he took so long leaving and saying goodbye to Hunni (then called Lucky) that it slipped my mind until he was already out the...