On certain days, this journal, or rather this exhibition of emotion through the medium of words, lacks in any sort of significance. But it's days and moments like this that justify the presence and importance of my writing and thus this journal. Today marked a day that I remember and perhaps will remember for a very long time. As with many things that remind me of you, this day was subtle and...

It is difficult to brush away these moods, to put them aside, to ignore their existence, because the truth is that they occur. I am no longer in the mindset to run away from anything and that includes these moods. It's not necessarily sadness or melancholy, in fact I'm not sure whether they are major elements at all in this mood. It's just contemplation, I suppose. It's just contemplation that...

Tired of being conflicted. I read somewhere that if you are feeling conflicted, it is because you are not letting your heart be. And so I will let my heart be. Let's just start with addressing this. Why do I feel conflicted, I wish I could just pin point. A lot of it has to do with you and how my thoughts wonder around you. If I could yell profanities out in the open and hope that it will all go...

Mismatched thoughts are dangling over my consciousness. In a state of calm, juxtaposed by frenzy, my mind knows not what it desires. Isn't desire the responsibility of the heart? Refusal to acknowledge my heart, refusal to accept that my heart may play a role in this, the heart - my heart, is simply ignored. Connections, links, reminders, memories all intertwine with each other and become...

Sunrises are better than sunsets by far. I like early mornings and the peacefulness that comes with it. I like the colour of the sky and how fresh it looks. I like how everything looks like it is waking up at the break of dawn, the roads, the side walks, the trees. I like waking up at six am without an alarm and feeling good because I've had enough sleep. I like being able to go back to sleep...

Complete and total adoration. My gift to you, my heart was yours. In ten weeks you shaped it, in one night you murdered it. Torn from my chest and laid at your feet. That first step that you took was the worst. Since then you've walked a thousand miles in solace and short remark. And I still have these memories but we will never see what we could have been. Remember when we talked about where we'd...

Letting go occurs on a daily basis. It is of high frequency. I am under the impression that letting go is a routine thing with many occurrences that go by unnoticed. I have been thinking about letting go. I wish I could let it all just go, I wish I didn't have to clear my mind so often and express all of it through the medium of writing. Don't get me wrong, I've really fallen in love with these...

Blurs and drip-drops. It was only a few weeks ago when it dawned on me that the rain built on surfaces aren't blurry drops. It wasn't too long ago for me to realise that street lights were not blurred yellow circles. My blurry vision has been corrected and with it, many things that were previously blurry, but to me - normal, have become sharpened in ways I found utterly unbelievable. Do we live in...

How old are you? Does your age define you? Do you think you act your age? What does it mean to act your age, to you?Where are you from? Are you from a city like me? A small town? A quiet suburb? Do you like your physical environment?Do you go to school? Are you in university? Do you like school? What's your favourite thing about school, both in terms of learning and the experience?Do you have...

One of the worst feelings is knowing that your parents aren't happy with each other. And that they are not going to do anything about it. They act fine, even happy, most of the times. But the things that are said during the fights are revelations that go past what I'd imagined. It's hard to imagine someone being so upset with someone else. It breaks my heart. I am not one to share details of my...

I've never seen a smile that can light the room like yours. It's simply radiant, I feel more with everyday that goes by. I watch the clock to make my timing just right. Would it be okay, would it be okay if I took your breath away.That used to be our song and I've avoided it for the last two months at any cost but it came on just now as I was working on my notes. Thinking I'm past it all, I looked...

I have just submitted my first chapter to my story. I am not really writing to ask you all to read it, though it would be lovely to get feedback. It's my first time doing this sort of thing. I am extremely shy about my writing and I have never been much of a story-writer but I once had a flow of words some time ago and wrote that out. It's been saved on my computer for long enough and I thought it...

I am getting rid of all the messages I still had from you. I never really saw them. I knew I had them but I never looked at them and that was enough to put me off from deleting it. But I saw it today and I decided to get rid of it. The lack of physical reminders can do wonders on moving on and your memory of that particular thing. I read through one of our messages. I can think about it and I can...

I feel very ready to move on with my life. I am thinking about all these plans for the future and it is enabling me to anticipate precious moments that have the possibility of occurring. Holding elements of both motivation and liberation, this is a feeling I have been holding out for. It is always nice to have something to look forward to, something to keep you pushing. It has been a while since I...

Do you what's really amazing? Watching the clouds and taking in the vastness of the sky from your very own bedroom window. I live in an apartment where you either have the mountain facing view or the sea facing view. I have the mountain facing view and on days like this, I can't help but smile at the beauty of it. I am sure I would've loved the sea view as well, but since I don't know how good it...

I found those letters I wrote when I missed you. This time, I didn't rip them apart and throw them away as I have been doing to almost anything related to you. Out of sight, out of mind. I read them over. It's funny reading those words. I can't describe the feeling. I wish I had the right words. Little things started coming to me. Little things come to me now and then, and though they are little,...

Lost. I think that's the word that can describe how I'm feeling right now. I hate that. When you suddenly feel that low for no reason in particular. You have no idea what triggered it. You were fine an hour ago, but suddenly, you're not exactly okay. You just feel low. I think you can always distract yourself from these feelings and make yourself feel better though and I'm glad there is that...

I've been spending a lengthy amount of time behind the books recently as I have some serious exams coming my way. There is a noticeable trend I have began to spot when I study intensely. I really do like being educated and I don't mean this in a nerdy way, so to speak. I just like the knowledge, the ability to learn more about the vast world and the incomprehensible amount of information out...

I used to hate saying goodbyes. The finality of a goodbye was saddening to me. However, I've come to realise that goodbyes are nothing to hate. Sooner or later, things come to end. And of course, nothing lasts forever. How many times has that saying popped up in one of your conversations? One too many probably. It is true though, nothing does last forever. Here I am, about to graduate from a...

I think that the the most important lessons in life are learnt for there is no way they can be taught. You'll be told repeatedly about what to stay away from. You'll be warned, it's not that you won't. But you won't be prepared for what's to come. No one can prepare you for the shocks that life throws at you. You will hear stories about people's experiences but that will not prepare you. It'll...