(5-1-14)Help? I don't need help. I don't want help.Have you ever stopped and remembered the horrible things that were all your fault? How you'll never be able to go back and change them? Stop and think about them now. Think of the mess you created after ward. Think of how you can never take it back and change it.Have you ever lost a friend over your own selfish desires? Have you ever wished you...

I want you to smile at me and whisper sweet nothings, tracing pictures on my skin with your fingers. I want you to take pictures of me wearing only my bra, panties, and your favorite jacket. I want you to kiss me until I melt into liquid pleasure in your arms. I want to talk until sunrise and we smoke cigarettes until our throats burn. I want your voice to be the only thing I look forward to at...

"I had to tell them you were gone,I had to tell them they were wrong..." [1]Those on my side blame you. They have no idea what I've said done."You were my ally once,You were my confidante..." [2]You were mine once. Don't you dare forget."She said, 'I know what it's like to be dead,I know what it is to be sad.'" [3]Melancholic depression has a hell of an effect."I'll protect you from all the things...

I'm not a part of your world anymore. I've become garbage, even baggage. A parasite. I've lost my mind and there's no going back. With or without you, I will always be pathetic and worthless. I've become that crazy ex-girlfriend you pity and blame and ignore. I may be insane, but I'm not blind.I blame myself. Hell, I even pity myself. I don't even know why I'm still trying. What am I waiting for?...

Maybe I'm exaggerating. Maybe this break up isn't as bad as I'm making it seem. At least, not for you anyway. You seem to be doing better than me, from what I've seen. But what do I know, right? I'm too afraid to talk to you anymore. I'm afraid I'll slip up and ruin your life again. I've done it before, I wouldn't put it passed me that I wouldn't do it again accidentally.Maybe I'm bring over...

You have no idea how difficult it is to restrain from picking up the phone and calling you everyday. You have no idea how hard it is for me to stay away from you, let you start over. You have no idea how sad it is to watch you from afar, meeting new people and falling love again while I'm stuck. You have no idea how angry I get when I remember we're just friends. You have no idea how much I...

I just wish for once my jealousy wouldn't get the best of me amd turn me into this like horrible bitch monster creature! I have like enough jealousy to fill two skyscrapers. It's freaking crazy and I HATE IT!I fall in love with all these people and get jealous when I see someone I really like with someone else that isn't me. Or when I'm not all they ever talk about. There's this little nagging...

I have never cried so much at the words "ok bye" or at the sight of a brick mailbox. I've become so unstable lately I'm so afraid I'll never be happy whether we're together or not. I'm tempted to beg my mom to save money so we can move away, so I can forget everyone and everything that's stuck with me for the past 5 years. I've never felt so alone, even when I'm with a friend. I've never been so...

*midnight*I'll never forget the various times you talked me out of suicide. How you stayed with me, even cried with me, until the urges passed and I was calm again. You were always the first person I called when I was even thinking about offing myself . If anybody could convince me enough to live another day, it was always you, love. You'd talk about your cats to distract me, or listen when I...

here we go.i had a freaking meltdown in the car yesterday after being hit with nostalgia and it freaked my mom out. she thought it was her fault because i wouldn't tell her why i was crying and i felt so horrible. i assured her it wasn't her fault and she tried her best to cheer me up and distract me from whatever it was. and it worked! i've been writing a lot of poetry lately to get things off my...