Can you help me with advice for writing?

I never feel like I get any response in the story part of this site, so I'll post my newly written piece here. Before you tell me that "that's not what the journals are for", just help me out with a little critique here :DOkay, here it goes:As I saw a huddled person sitting in front of the gravestone, I heard sobs of despair and sorrow. The night was one of the darkest in years. No lights shone...
August 23rd, 2011 at 09:12pm

So my friends are hating on me, I'm moving and I'm scared.

The title really says it all :)I said no to getting wasted with my friends the other week because honestly the people they had invited were lame, and one of them was my ex that I had a rather intimate meeting with in the back of a van(not sex) a while ago....and I just plainly didn't feel like getting drunk...So I said no, and now they are like, "oh no we're busy" "we're working"...And I know for...
August 8th, 2011 at 10:14pm

What Norwegians love about Norway(In light of the terror)

One of our papers, Aftenposten, asked Norwegians what they like the most about Norway. I agree with a lot of what has been sent in:The right to vote, who ever you are.The long summer holiday.Being involved is appreciated.That bus drives wave when they meet on the road.That the most dangerous thing at our cabin is a non-lethal snake.The wealth.That it's OK to be gay.Twenty-year olds can get into...
August 6th, 2011 at 05:57pm

I'm so scared, I live an hour away from Oslo [[Oslo bombings]]

Seriously, seeing it on the TV scares me....I've been sitting here since early this afternoon watching it...and NOW! This man, dressed as a policeman, started shooting people/kids at a youth camp for the Norwegian Labour party....They say that 30 kids could have been shot!I used to be in that youth group.So far 7 people are reported dead by the bomb, but I am sure more will be found as soon as...
July 22nd, 2011 at 09:24pm

I'm at the beginning of my life.

I finally graduated high school. FINALLY!Jesus and all his friends, oh how I have longed for it to end! My GPA is just okay, so I hope to get into the University in Tromsø, to study archeology! I would love that!There was a point where I really hated every teacher and student at my school, they were getting on my nerves :)Even my friends bothered me, but I haven't seen them for a month now, and i...
July 4th, 2011 at 11:47pm

Tyler Lockwood. Hot damn.

I'm watching Vampire Diaries, and he just took his shirt off.Hallelujazz, that man is like sex on a stick.I'm over-happy about a dude on TV taking of his shirt, aren't I?Well lets put it this way, the girl ain't gettin' any love these days.-.-Let me change the subject an inch to the left, other hot guys of all time.First of; Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki. Daaaaaaayimnn. (Say that like a black...
February 17th, 2011 at 08:29pm

My life is on the verge of all the things important. School/Education.

Oh my God! I am so sick with worry about what the heck I'm going to become in life. Seriously, I see no other choice than either a hooker or a drug-dealer.Okey, maybe not so damn dramatic. But you see my point.This is my last semester of high school. My grades this year they were, well. Bad. Plain bad.I won't be able to get in to where and what I wanted to, so I think I'll just take a year-long...
February 5th, 2011 at 10:44pm

Live At The Apollo

Oh my gosh, that show is sooooooo funny! They have so many awesome comedians there, I laugh so hard every time.The best one is Michael McIntyre, he's so good at accents and weird people xDWhenever I watch the show, I really want to speak with a British accent. They make it sound so cool, and they speak super fast, but luckily I have gotten to a point where I understand everything they say, before...
February 4th, 2011 at 07:34pm

Sober & Fatter & Peas & Pears

Not drinking, means getting fatter. For real though... :/ Need starvation now, happy with how little I ate today. That feels really lame to say. But it's true. Complicated and lame. Issues and stupid things like these are things I'd rather leave behind me, but alas - I am to weak to just drop it and move on. I really wish I was.Stay on topic, stay on topic....Peas, not the same as peace. HAH,...
February 1st, 2011 at 08:14pm

I dreamt something, and I don't know where I got it from. [[Michael Bublé]]

It felt really familiar, it all started with me, floating like some omni-ish person in the air, and I saw the whole scene from the sky. It was this woman, she was apparently going to be killed/destroyed/thrown in some kind of prison. This dictator-person had said she should be damned, because she went against him. This was like medieval time, they were on horses and stuff. So they came riding over...
January 30th, 2011 at 10:39pm

Apparently I like older men, & my friend likes boys.

When I say older men, I mean like up to 40.Because older than that, over 40, is kinda creepy. Unless their like super duper hot actors.The explanation is that when we discuss the guys we think are hot, or the ones we'd like to *ahem* b-a-n-g. Later she said that the reason she said it, is because I always favor the ones that look older or are older. She likes the ones that look really kid-like....
January 28th, 2011 at 08:58pm

www.cuteblackboys.tumblr.com

Oh me gosh. This here is sent from up above.Damn it. I think I'm a victim of a fetish xDI just think brown skin is sooooo much hotter than beige. I wish I was dark. I'm so white I glow in the damn dark.I now have a huge crush on that damn Kid Cudi. He's hot.Let me talk you over....UsherKanye WestB.o.BThat guy that plays Eggs in True Blood.I wonder, is it only their color? (sorry if this sounds...
January 14th, 2011 at 11:46pm

Taco Burger. Diet next week : D & Questions

I'm a taco burger.Hoho. Just kidding.I am however kinda chubby. So yep, imma remove my ass fat and my belly fat next week : DHopefully.I'm not going to be this skinny as* mothereffer. I think I would look like a effin freak like that.But it's a week of drinking this soup-ish thing. It doesn't taste very good, but I''m going to do it.Determination.It's also this detox thingy, so I'm going to be...
January 14th, 2011 at 10:42pm

Arne går mot døra. His brain oozes out.

Arne walks to the doorThinking thoughts he has thought a thousand times already.As usual dressed in black, a pale, pale face with amatching mustache. A matching mustache!The stairs seem damn long ...Arne humming a song depresivly!Downstairs awaits a door ... before I'm down, thinks Arne, I'm sure I'm dead.What is the meaning of life Arne ponders.But the poor guy, before he finds the answer Arne...
January 11th, 2011 at 05:41pm

Ball,doing stupid things,Irritating people on facebook, and oh yeah...

I went to a ball this weekend : D It was fun. I shared a date with one of my best friends. (It's random who you end up with). He was nice, and we sat at a table with that guys friend. So they like supported each other, so talking was really easy :P To bad he has a girlfriend :P Haha xDThis brings me over to doing stupid things. I was drunk at this ball, so I just had to go do something silly. So,...
January 10th, 2011 at 09:38pm

Not allowed forever on this earth, but allowed forever in our hearts.

I don't really know why I began thinking about people dying early. It's just been alot of it lately in the news. Just today 5 people died in a car crash in Northern Norway. Not to mention my cousin and my grandfathers sister and brother just crashed their car a couple of days ago. My cousin Linn is alright, and my grandfathers sister is good, but grandfathers brother is not doing well. He is still...
January 8th, 2011 at 12:17am

First day of school and I'm sitting here like a twat. My driver is late...

Yep. I should have been picked up ages ago. Now I'm sitting here, boring myself out of order. I called my driver, and he said the agency didn't know that school started today. I told my driver and the agency this. DO THEY GET IT? Nooo.That would be to much to ask...So, it's new years, huh?I just realised I have 106 effin days left of school. Then I just have 5 YEARS!!!!! in college...I can't wait....
January 3rd, 2011 at 08:05am

Jack Sparrow.

Oh me gosh!I love Jack Sparrow. He's so damn funny! Johnny Depp is like the awesomest actor in the world! I'm watching the first movie now, it's show timeeee! :OAnd then later I will watch the second :)Is there a third? Or am I just daft?I wish I could be a pirate. Or a woman knight. Is that called something special?Knightesse?Or maybe I would be a ninja. Shame is, when you're a chick, getting...
December 28th, 2010 at 11:45pm

Since it's Christmas, lets talk about shit we hate.

I hate people who spend to much time on these damn computers. I'm not saying computers are wrong, and evil. I use them myself. I am not that stupid.But we all know those people, that sit idle by their trusted screen. They look like something the cat dragged in because they haven't seen the sun in forever, they haven't lifted anything heavier than the damn sofa cushion and only to look for their...
December 28th, 2010 at 12:41am

Why are most mibba people against partying/drinking?

I SAID MOST! So don't go mental on me!When ever it is discussed, so many people are like "meeeh, drinking is so lame" or they are like this "only sluts get wasted" or "I'd rather stay at home, reading a book".First off, drinking can be lame if you do it in a crazy way. But if you just enjoy enough to make you go "hahahahahhahahahahahahaaaaa", you're where you want to be!And second, not only sluts...
December 20th, 2010 at 12:54am