Being depressed is nothing new to me, I've been clinically diagnosed, I understand the science of it, and I know what the chemical imbalances mean in terms of my psyche. Some days are better than others, and then we have days like today. It was a bad day from the time I woke up until now. To the point where I was back in my bathroom with my pills. Not that anyone in my family would really care....

Well. Tonight certainly has had interesting weather. First it was just grey, then it started raining, then harder rain, followed by light storming, to storming, to now. My entire house keeps getting shaken by the force of the thunder. Usually I absolutely adore storms, but tonight's is just a bit unsettling to me. Something isn't right, I can feel it, I just don't what's wrong exactly. I can't let...

I understand that we don't have a lot of money and that plane tickets are expensive, but, I need a bit of closure. I need to go make goodbyes to my uncle. It's just... It'll help me get on with my life. That's the point of a funeral. To remember, to make peace if need to, to say goodbye, to mourn, and to be with your family when they need you the most. Unless of course you're me, then you stay...

Hi guys, it's Ty here. It's a little after 12 AM and I'm here, in bed, cuddling with my cat. I've had quite the excellent weekend and it would have ended perfectly if I hadn't received word, via facebook, that my Uncle Julio passed away late Saturday morning. Normally I'd post this type of thing on Tumblr. Tonight, however, I'm posting here because I am not looking for sympathy, on simply looking...

So, this morning, Ashlee and I discussed how corrupt my children would be if I ever, by some unealistic miracle, spawned with Jake Pitts, yeah I said spawned leave me be. And it was really quite amusing, until I got to thinking about it all. I came to a very important conclusion- I will never have kids. Ever. I t would be a horrible thing for me to do. I do not like them enough to have my own, and...

Alright, there seems to be a lot of stupid drama stirred up because I reacted angrily to a comment on one of my journals. I apologize for retaliating in such a hash manner, I was angry and felt that it was only fair, I'm not always the most mature 18 year old, and I shouldn't have resorted to name calling. Like I said, I'm sorry I was out of line and that's all I can say about that. And...

Okay, to the asshats who just fucking ragged on me about bitching. Excuse me but I am not stupid, I do know about poverty and hunger and abuse and stuff like that. But I just fucking buried a very close family member, and have another one who is dying from cancer, so fuck you and your preaching bullshit. Fuck. You. I realize that my life doesn't look like it suck in comparison to people like that,...

And by it sucks I mean it really blows balls at the moment. I am sleep deprived, irritated, depressed, severly in need of food, and I have to go to a funeral for a family member in a couple of days. Plus, today I find out if one of the women who practically raised me is responding to her radiation therapy the way she should be, or if it's a lost cause. So basically- your gun, my head. Or something...

Point A) On of my best friends is moving back to Michigan from New York and is going to be going to the same college as me. This makes me so fucking happy, like you people do not understand I almost cried with happiness because I haven't seen her in two years.Point B) I get that some people don't like BVB, and hey, that's fine by me 'cause I'll still love them. What does bother me though is when...

I planked yesterday. That shit kind of hurts. Like I really just thought it would be easy to layout on something and make my body straight, but no. It takes a lot of muscle focus and effort, and Jesus my sister is a horrible photographer, like she caught me at the worst angle possible, I was not a satisified panda about it.I'll probably plank something later today, like it may become a daily...

Well. I haven't really written a journal here on mibba, mainly because of tumblr and lj.... Anyaay, I think I'll use mibba for venting and such.To start, I miss Ben. Every damn day. And I can't believe he left me here to fend for myself. Secondly, I thought my iTouch had been stolen, I even went and made a police report only to be called by my college. Apparently someone found it and turned it,...