November 13th, 2015 at 01:37am
So it took a little while to kind of take everything in that was happening. That happened/ had the potential to happen I should say. Because if I wasn't mistaken it seemed like my boss was flirting with me last night.
It could have been the alcohol talking, but more than 25% of my being told me maybe not. Because although he was intoxicated, he carried himself rather well and was very coherent at all times. So I was pretty sure he was being overly friendly to me with intention.
But was he doing it out of feelings he might have, or was it a manipulation tactic to get me to do my job better?
I liked him. I found him attractive and smart and funny. But he was the one with the motivation to ask me out. He must feel the same way as I do.
And he's sticking his neck out on the line for me. He wants to get to know me and take me out, not just as friends. It took a lot for him to bring it up to me.
I value that. And I value him.
Which is why I was crazy enough to say yes.
But look at my life so far.
Is it really that crazy that I would date my boss/ married man?
Okay so yea it is kind of insane that I would do that, even for me and how my life has turned out so far. But still. I don't want to sacrifice my happiness anymore. I shouldn't have to.
Carter and I are adults. We have our own rights to make our own choices.
Do I think it's right for him to cheat on his wife, with me? No.
But that is their business. And it wouldn't be long before they were over with anyways. Hopefully.
So I decided to not tell my sister about Carter just yet. She was way too busy and I was way too scared to tell her. So it kind of worked out. She didn't question my whereabouts or ask many questions in general, and that was quite the relief. I didn't want to hide from her but I just wasn't ready to tell her yet.
I knew that eventually I would have to, but it was still such an early stage in our relationship, if that's even what it was, for a lack of a better term.
The only people that I was worried about was my coworkers. If they found out? They would hate me, make my life hell, and probably get Carter in a lot of trouble/ get me fired somehow.
We were breaking so many rules but we already committed and there was no turning back now.
I didn't want to.
So I kept my mouth shut at work, pretended like nothing was going on, and did my job as I was told.
"I don't know what is going on, but I'm scared that Mr. Sinclair has lost his mind," one of my coworkers said to another.
"Why do you say that?" I asked even though I wasn't sure if I was entirely part of the conversation.
"Because he actually gave Gwen the night off last night. And this morning there was bagels in the lobby. With cream cheese and butter. He's losing it."
I furrowed my eyebrows.
"So?"
Todd laughed, right in my face.
"So? He's a cold-hearted cutthroat shark, Jarrett. They don't do nice things for other people. Especially when they never have before. It's strange."
"Well maybe he's turning over a new leaf," I said as a matter of fact.
"No, I doubt it. Something else must me going on."
I bit my lip.
I hoped nobody was catching on.
But I'm sure if they were they wouldn't talk about it in front of me.
They probably have no idea.
But it's kind of nice that Carter is trying a little bit to be nicer to his workers.
Even though the bagel thing was 100% my idea. I told him I was starving in the mornings and don't have time to eat, so my guess is that he couldn't just get me a bagel, he had to get everyone a bagel so it didn't look suspicious.
Giving that woman Gwen the night off, that was him though.
Maybe I'm rubbing off on him?
Or maybe he really is a sweetheart deep down. That's what I really think. He cares a lot more about a lot more than people think. If that makes any sense.
I'm just so glad that I get to witness a totally different side to him.
Speaking of that... We had a date tonight.
But not our usual kind of date. We weren't going anywhere. He requested to come to my place. I was happy that he wanted to come in and see what "regular life" was like. He didn't care that I didn't have much money. He didn't want me to feel embarrassed or anything like that. It made me feel better about my whole situation. And it also helped me realize that he just might actually have genuine feelings for me.
I had to snap out of my thoughts and get back to work, but it wasn't easy. I was excited and happy to see him later.
---------
As excited as I was, I was also very nervous. I didn't think he would judge me or anything, but my home was nothing like I imagined his was. I was almost certain he had a huge mansion with 8 or more bedrooms and a whole bunch of fancy things to go along with it.
I had a 50 inch TV with optimum on demand and that was about it.
My phone buzzed twice letting me know I had a text.
It was Carter telling me to look outside my door.
My heart raced as I fixed myself in the mirror one last time before answering the door.
I smiled and let him in.
He was holding a bottle of wine and handed it to me.
I awkwardly took it and offered to take his coat.
"I'll put it on this hook here. Thank you though Jarrett," he said kindly. "You have a lovely home."
I'm sure I blushed.
"It's not much but it's nice," I said as I set the bottle of wine down.
He looked at one of my "family photos" of me and my sister that was hanging on the wall.
"That's my sister. We live here together."
I forgot if I ever told him about that. But by the look on his face it seemed I didn't.
"Just you two?"
"Yea. It's a long story," I said while scratching the back of my neck. "The pizza is in the oven. And no it's not frozen. I actually made it," I said with a laugh.