So today I went to therapy for the first time. It was just an intake but they asked a helluva lot of questions."Do you feel irritable most days? Do you have suicidal thoughts? Do you self harm? How many times have you done it? When do you think you'll be ready to finish therapy? Do you abuse drugs? How many times have you done drugs? What's your family like? Do you have feelings of sadness because...

At around 3am this morning i kinda lost it. I cut myself 5 times on my thigh with a random tack i found in the wall. Then I passed out.This morning I had no recollection of what I'd done so I obviously didn't make any attempt in hiding the scars. My sister saw them and she told my mom as soon as she woke up.I'm just so pissed but then again I'm grateful that my sister cared enough to tell someone....

So I'm not sure if this is a result of the New New Mibba, but I need some help...I was writing a short story on here last night and I was at a rough spot. I didn't know where to take the story, and it being about 2 in the morning, I decided to save it as a draft in the story section and finish it later.Today I knew exactly what direction to take the story, so I logged on to finish. Here's the...

TODAY I SAW DOMINIC AND WE WERE HANGING OUT PRIOR TO SEEING MADAGASCAR 3 AND BEFORE WE LEFT I SAID "OKAY IM GONNA KISS YOU NOW" AND THEN I DID AND KINDA JUST WALKED AWAY.THEN AT THE THEATER HE FINALLY AND OFFICIALLY ASKED ME OUT AND I SAID OKAY AND I KISSED HIM ANOTHER TIME.THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAY WAS WHEN MY HEAD WAS ON HIS SHOULDER AND HE KISSED MY FOREHEAD OMG I SMILED SO BIG.i apologize if...

Every time i have this nightmare (which is about twice a month) a bad day always follows.Wanna hear about it? Oh well, ill tell you anyways. I sowy! (>")>Adam and I are in a creepy little cottage. its nighttime and its like theres literally lonliness and abandonment in the air. anyways, theres a scary old lady in the house with us. shes always trying to corner and trap us, but we manage to...

So I went to the doctors on monday.All in all, I have 2 types of moderate depression. One where I'm just in a negative mood and think negatively. The other is where I have no motivation to do anything ever, and I dont like the things i used to.And i need to take pills and see a therapist. But my mom is procrastinating and wont schedule an appointment >.>I havent even gotten the pills yet,...

I think my depression is getting worse. I'm finding myself sad more than i ever have before and it sucks >.> but at least i told my mom im worried, because now she'll hopefully make an appointment with a doctor to figure out once and for all if i have depression or bipolar. its scary to think of this becoming 'real'.Its just..gah. hopefully its only minor and not severe. o.oIm listening to...

Ok so I've pretty much given up on Poetry Month.Like, the server crash kinda made me lose all my motivation. I've been having to repost stuff and so I'm becoming behind. And no one's reading my poems anymore. I used to get more than 10 readers in a day with at least one comment, and now I can barely get 5 readers let alone any comments.I'm just so sad about my writing lately..being on Mibba has...

So I'm just gonna be contributing to everyone yelling at the server crash.Seriously. April is National Poetry Month so I decided to post a poem everyday in April. I was actually sticking by the deal with myself but then the server decides to crash and erase 11 of my poems. All of which I have to repost. And it sucks for everyone else who lost other writings!And okay, so obviously Mibba didn't mean...

Alright, so April is poetry month. I've decided that in honor of it, I'm posting a poem everyday from april 1st (today), to april 30. This isn't an april fools joke! And if I miss a day, I'll post two poems the next day and so on. So, if you want me to write about a specific thing, message me or post on my wall. :3 be sure to check out the daily poems and comment and such :D Har har, and also,...

I'm finally getting over him. I'm finally moving on. I've met someone else that gets my mind off of him. But I'm going to my aunt's this weekend, and I'm so scared that I'll see him again and be back to square one. Back to being where I was before, back to pining for him and filling my mind with the memories I'll never get back. I can't let that happen; I won't. I'm also scared of how I'll handle...

People ask me 'what's wrong?' everytime I look sad. And when I say I don't know, don't look at me like you think I'm faking. I either don't want to tell you, there's more than one reason, or I probably really don't know. Sometimes I'm just sad. And if you don't understand that, I'll probably give you a random reason so you'll just leave me alone. Sometimes I'm sad because of the memories and...

My mom found out I got high. And you know how you just hate it when you see your mom cry? Yeah, well you get a feeling 10x worse when you're the problem that's making her bawl. Ugh, I feel so stupid. And she's gonna tell my stepdad. When she does, he'll hit the roof. He will scream and do something irrational. He will scream. And scream. And scream. And when he's done screaming, he'll never trust...

I suffer from nostalgia. I know it's not really a disease, but that's the only way I can really describe it. I suffer. Everytime I remember something from my past, I have the urge to cry. I was so happy in those memories, but now I'm not as young. I'm not as carefree as I was then. I'm not happy. That was then, when my biggest worry was not getting candy. Now there's high school drama, there's...

There are those sad days. Those days where all smiles are fake or forced, like if someone tickles you. Where you feel alone standing next to your best friend. Where you feel hopeless. Where you feel like you're completely overreacting, where you feel like a stupid teenager, but then again you just can't find a reason to laugh. And when you do laugh, it's because of what your friends are doing to...

I got high for the first time last weekend. But Im not really writing about that. Im writing about what its done to my life in 5 short days.The day after I got high, I went to my aunts house. That evening, he came over to hang out. All was fine and good at first, but then my mind kept whispering to me. 'You broke your promise. You broke your promise. What will he think? What have you done?' Soon,...

I'm a confident person- standing up for myself and others, speaking my mind, dancing or falling in public but laughing it off, thinking of good comebacks at the right moment, staring back at others when they stare at me, starting conversations with strangers. I don't let ANYONE or ANYTHING bring me down.Anyone, that is, except myself.Does that make sense? Having confidence but being insecure at...

I saw HIM yesterday at my aunt's house, where I slept over for new years eve.Before the ball dropped, my cousins, HIM, and I went outside to make snowmen, because it finally started to snow.HE and I were out there alone for a minute, and we kissed under the falling flakes.Andy came out and started throwing snowballs, using me as a target. Andy told HIM to hold me down so he could throw one at my...

I really don't know what true love is, because I've never been in love. Sure, a couple people have claimed they're 'in love' with me, but I'd figured it wasn't really love, so I never expressed it back (plus, I didn't even like them).But now there's this kid, and I'm starting to wonder if maybe I really do love him. It's just so crazy, considering I first met him in mid-October, which was only...