LadyRaven / Comments

Yeah I’d definitely come after you with a pitchfork!!! I was internally freaking out when I found out you were leaving and was afraid that you were not going to update. Well I’m glad to know that you find our conversations to be fun as well, I’m also glad to hear that they help you out. :)

What story are you thinking of? Don’t worry I’ll still keep you on track with this one because I have to know what is going to happen to my Zacky! And I don’t mean that in a creep fangirl way either but I am emotionally invested in your Zacky so I must know what happens! XD

Yeah I didn’t think I would ever like m/m smut ever to be totally honest with you, but there is just something about them together, I don’t know what it is but yeah… maybe it is because they are both my favorites so I get a story about them both. :) I don’t even know what got me started on it to be totally honest with you. There seems to be more and more Bratt showing up here though. I’m not the biggest fan of that pairing. I just have a hard time seeing Matt as anything other than straight. Sometimes it’s even hard to read Synacky’s because Zacky and Brian are both pretty manly guys and some authors turn one/the other/or both into total girls! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS??? So yeah finding Synacky stories may not be hard but finding good ones certainly is.

I don’t write Synacky but does this mean that I’m awesome??? XD

That is the wording I was looking for! I was sitting here trying to find the right words to describe how he seemed and resigned acceptance is it! Yes I do remember that he was drunk, and you are right he does get broody when his drunk. Oh I have no doubt that he has plenty of fight in him left. I’d ream you a new one if you turned him into a pussy! XD I guess it was just the upset of finding out what had happened and Zacky’s broodiness all tied together to make it seem so depressing (does that make sense?).

Don’t be sorry (and something tells me that you are secretly enjoying all this so yeah if I’m right you can’t be too sorry XD). That is very true! I’m glad you brought that up, I guess I’m just preparing myself for Brian to utterly disappoint me that I forget that he is still a good guy at heart and doesn’t come across as an elitist. He could have very well been kept in the dark about what happened because he is friends with Zacky and maybe (it’s a small but unlikely possibility) he could have been one of the only ones to have done something about it. And you can’t blame me for trying! XD

True true, but I would have figured that Zacky would know that if she went so far as to have her brothers kill him for giving her a note then making her think that he likes her than saying some pretty mean things is not going to bother her. More than likely it would just make her want to have him killed again.

Thank God! Well I did say that if Brian knows about what happened then he and Ava deserve each other and should both go jump of a cliff, but I’m not lobbying for them to sleep together. Well that is a nice change of pace. :) OH THANK YOU FOR THAT!!! I’m sooooo happy to hear that things are about to get unbearable for her. I can’t wait! It is probably going to be my favorite chapter. XD

Okay okay! Don’t bite my head off, geesh! XD And sorry it is probably my crappy ability to communicate via written text. I am so much better at expressing myself eloquently in person.

I know it was just a possibility that I would have never considered. It seems so unlikely (but then that also makes it all the more likely since it’s Drake and he seems like the kind of guy to try and do the unexpected). Plus since Zacky once liked Ava it wouldn’t be too hard to assume that Zacky would take her as a mate rather than trying to get some random person on his side to render Zacky useless. Holy mother of Johnny Christ! It is simply diabolical! No one would really see it coming!

Oh please give me a good old fashion catfight between Kat and Ava! I want to see Kat in action! :)

Yeah there is no redeeming her. Every way I have tried to look at it she still comes out looking really bad.

XD

Yeah I know but I’m still reeling from this last surprise, and the funny thing is I knew it was coming!

It wore off entirely too quickly, actually, so the vast majority of the class, I was unfortunately completely sober. Haha, I don't think you're crazy or 'obsessed', love! I think you like the story enough to come after me with a pitchfork if I decided I just was randomly going to switch to a new topic and do my usual write-three-chapters-and-give-up kind of thing, but I find that motivating, not crazy. xD But seriously, the time you take to tell me all of your little inner ramblings is actually very well spent and appreciated, I promise, because having these conversations with you is not only fun, but it really does a good job of keeping me in the mindset of this story. So that I don't run off and start writing a different story I've been thinking of off and on now that I'm actually in Ireland.

And I'm glad that worked out well for you! Luckily, Synackys usually aren't that hard to find. Great minds think alike? I'unno. For whatever reason, I can't read much m/m smut in fanfictions, but it seems like all of the awesome people I meet on here write Synacky, so yeah.

And I know Zacky seemed defeated, but I want you to know that he very much has not given up or anything. It was more... resigned acceptance than defeat. And he was drunk, remember. He gets broody like that sometimes when he's drunk, but not usually ever when he's sober. So just... don't worry too much about him seeming defeated; there's plenty of fight left in that man, that's for sure.

I'm sorry your nervous! Purebloods stick together, especially in that pack, for the most part. Just remember that he did leave the pack, and, therefore, the purebloods, and he wasn't even interested in playing nice with Drake when he showed up. Ava had to keep nudging him to tell him to shut the fuck up. I mean, that obviously doesn't mean he doesn't know anything; I'm just saying, don't feel like it's guaranteed that he does. And no, I wasn't hinting at anything in particular. By 'something' I just meant that you should remember it doesn't have to be an all or nothing thing with Brian. Which, I'm sure, you've already figured out. That's just all I meant; don't try to dig for any deeper meaning there.

And very, very true. I appreciate you letting me know where your head is at! (:

Well, all that matters is that you can see how Zacky figured it might affect her in some way, and how he would be willing to try and do it on the chance that it would fuck with her. Whether or not it bothered the 'cold and unfeeling bitch' is not really the point, after all.

Haha, so noted. And I think, for once, no one is lobbying for Brian and Ava to do anything -- something I've never been supportive of, anyways -- and a bunch of people are actually on the same side as you for once. Times have changed; that's for sure. Let me calm at least one of your nerves just a bit: I will promise you that this whole revelation will definitely result in Ava's life being at least a little unbearable at at least one point in the coming chapters.

I don't completely understand your distinction, but I think that's more because I'm exhausted and sick and kind of just staring at the screen than anything else. So I'm going to nod and pretend I do. Which makes no sense, because I just told you I didn't. WHATEVER LEAVE ME ALONE. But no, I do understand the second half of that, so it makes some amount of sense. I think I get the idea, yeah.

I didn't say that Drake necessarily is willing to pay her to mate with Zacky; I just offered it as another possibility. It seems a little out of character on the one hand, but on the other... he hasn't been very successful in trying to kill Zacky in the past; that edge might be just what he needs, and, of course, Ava could always get a 'proper mate' right afterwards, as if it never happened. And you're completely right, that would bean she's pulling the wool over... everyone's eyes.

Oh my gosh! xDD Very nice! I know you were, and I totally get why. But unfortunately, that's not coming up anytime too soon. Maybe a little further down the road, but not just yet.

(:

Yeah, all is right in the world again, isn't it? I hear you, don't worry, and for the first time, I think even some of the Ava Cheerleaders do, too. And then, of course, there are the other ones who are trying to look for a way to completely absolve her of all guilt ever (and that's completely not possible; I've warned that from the get-go), but what can you do?

What can I say? xD

And relax a little bit! Surprises aren't always terribly, terribly bad! Some of them are minor, anyways. But, yeah. I mean, the story's not ending as it is right now, so there have to be surprises for it to, you know, get to an end.

NICE! I love going to class drunk. XD And you know you don’t have to tell me that. I know, because you tell me all the time. It is nice though to be reminded that my insane attachment to your story is appreciated. Sometimes I’m afraid that you think I’m crazy with how ‘obsessed’ I am with your story.

Yeah actually a new story had just been posted after I finished my comment to you and so it helped. I actually thanked the author for her impeccable timing and explained that I really need some fluff to help get over your update. Yeah the way he felt about the whole thing was very upsetting. It was like he had come to accept that this was going to be his life, that he would never be good enough. He just seemed so defeated. :(

I can understand the important distinction between her just going into heat and what actually happened in the hot tube. At the time though I didn’t know what was going on so that was why I asked. Then I just wanted to give you examples of why I thought she might have gone into heat and why Zacky got pissed.

Yeah and that is what is making me nervous! I don’t like the idea that Brian may have known. Yeah I know he only said that it was Ava’s brothers (I didn’t say that Brian was involved in any way shape or form), but it seems like the purebloods stick together and therefore Brian might have known about it after the fact. By the way when you italicized something were you hinting at something?
EXACTLY! As far as we know Zacky doesn’t know that Brian ‘may’ have known about what happened, BUT! Brian could have known and kept quiet about it. If so then I would end up hating Brian (and I don’t want to hate Brian). I know your not going to tell me so I’m not even upset about it (again just letting you know where my head is at).

LOL! XD

If it were me (since I am nothing like Ava) then yeah it would bother me. BUT! Again this is Ava we’re talking about her (she is a cold and unfeeling) so no I don’t expect that to bother her. Yeah I guess I could see why Zacky would try.

I know I’m just routing for Zacky to make Ava’s life just as unbearable as she is making his. This is me lobbying for that to happen. XD

No I didn’t mean disown her disown her (I just couldn’t think of another word to use), but he is saying that if this is the true Ava then she isn’t who he thought she was and therefore she isn’t really family (to me this is sort of like disowning her). I mean if I told my family (or they found out) that I wasn’t who I had been pretending to be and they said what Matt had said then I would consider myself disowned. Of course Matt didn’t say that to Ava so… technically she isn’t disowned. Does that make any sense?

I guess that that could also be a possibility; I didn’t think that Drake would be willing to pay his sister to mate with Zacky to make it possible to kill him. If that is so then Ava is a whole new kind of evil and an elitist to boot! This would also mean that she is pulling the wool over Brian’s eyes, because she played that “What would Drake do?” game with him. Oh how I hate Ava!!!

Oh well darn! I was hoping for a ‘cat’ fight! LOL! Get it Kat fight! Also it is funny because they are dogs and not cats! XD I’m so cheesy I crack myself up. Seriously though, I was hoping to see Kat go after Ava for what happened to Zacky. Oh well.

Well poo on you too! XD

If Ava were directly responsible for what happened to Zacky and having the intentions of him dying then no she clearly must not care for the guys’ friendship. Then again if she were paid by Drake for either of the possibilities that have been presented then she doesn’t care for their friendship because she would be screwing them if it was my suggestion, and if it is yours then she would be causing them all a great deal of pain by causing them to lose another brother. All in all she is an evil conniving bitch and I really don’t see anyway of redeeming her. So yeah now I loathe Ava.

Don’t worry about it! Yeah I figured I’d get something like that. You are very fond of “no comment.”

AND, OH CRAP!!!

And I appreciate it as always, and I super appreciate your comment... as always! I just realized I was an ass and didn't say that in the last comment. I was rushing to reply to you before I went off to class... and I might've still been just a little bit drunk. xD

Aw, I'm sorry anyways, but at least there is always plenty of Synacky fluff to run off to! You'll always be able to find some to cheer you up. (: And I know; I completely understand why this chapter upset you, especially because of how... stoic? Zacky was about the whole thing.

The heat question wasn't really weird! And it made perfect sense to me; I understood what you were saying exactly, and I understood why you came to that conclusion. I just wanted you to for sure have that detail clear because it was such an important distinction, and it obviously was important enough to piss Zacky off. Certainly, he'd have probably freaked at recognizing she was starting to go into heat, but his reasons for being pissed in this chapter were obviously deeper than that. That's something I couldn't afford to let you misunderstand. And yeah, Matt definitely said that, and that very well could be right around the corner.

I'm glad you don't expect me to tell you, and I'm super glad that you are letting me know where your head is at! I think you're the only one asking that question, too, because everyone else was already too blindsided to even think about someone else blindsiding them. xD You're right, Brian's a pureblood, so it makes sense that he would know something. But Zacky listed the five werewolves that were actually present while he was in that shed, and he only listed the Rinaldi brothers. Of course, I don't know that he would list Brian even if he had been there, but if he had been there, do you really think he and Zacky would be nearly as close as they are? Which only serves to say that as far as Zacky is concerned, Brian doesn't even know he was trapped in that shed for four days. Does he really know about it? You'll have to find out with the others, sorry!

Okay, good! And no worries; I'm sure I worded things terribly, too. I completely understand how difficult perfect wording can be when you're upset. Or mildly intoxicated.

Exactly. I'm glad that makes sense to you know.

But if you're a person who's used to most werewolves being interested in you for your blood status (not to say you're at all lacking self confidence, because, come on, we can't even hypothetically pretend that Ava doesn't think she's attractive, too), and suddenly someone is spending a great deal of time and effort not necessarily saying that he likes you, but that he's really attracted to you for all different kinds of reasons, and blah blah blah, and then after he's got you convinced of that, he says all of those terrible things to you... you don't think that'd bother you? I mean, keep in mind you're an eighteen year old girl who's never been intimate with someone before, too. But yeah, I'm not even saying that Ava was bothered. I'm just saying that, rationally, it makes sense why Zacky would think that maybe it would bother her, and maybe it'd definitely be worth trying just on the off chance that it would piss her off or knock her off her high horse.

I will tell you nothing of the sort. MUAHAHAHA. But no, really, if he does, it'll be revealed. If it's not mentioned, then he didn't.

Yeah, I'm glad that makes sense then! And I know, I love Matt, too!

He didn't disown her yet, remember. At the end of the chapter, he wasn't ranting off in his head about why he wants to kick her ass and make her pay and hates her beyond anything else, and blahblahblah. Talking about how that love didn't just vanish was his internal struggle to figure out how to feel. He didn't vehemently say "No! She's not our family! She never was!" remember, he just said that if that's who she really is, she really isn't family, and they were obviously mistaken. He said that who they loved is who they thought she was.

I'm saying/suggesting that that's what Zacky and Matt were hinting at. As Zacky pointed, out: "All we do know is that Drake showed up a few days later, she’s got fifty million dollars of his in her bank account, and she’s currently in a position to render me essentially immobile by just forgetting to make the damned tea on time."

From that, Zacky's suggesting that perhaps there was some kind of payment made that involved her taking him as a mate so that she could then easily render him unconscious. Of course, that would rely on Drake being willing to pay Ava to mate with Zacky, even if only for a short period of time until he was killed or whatever. Your scenario is the other obvious possibility for the fifty million dollars, yes. That's not what Zacky was drunkenly leaning toward, but Matt definitely saw that possibility -- I'll tell you that much.

We might not see Kat's reaction -- it depends on how writing that chapter goes, and on how long it takes for Matt to tell her. Like he said, he could avoid talking about it for a while, but he'd eventually have to tell her.

Haha, they're hopeful for the same reason you're trying to redeem Ava, there. Except, you're doing it more for Zacky's sake, I know, because you don't want him mated to someone who had him nearly murdered. I get it. It makes sense, despite your hatred of her. And yeah, that's certainly something to consider. I love how you have been taking the story's title into consideration; I told you before that was an important thing to do. Does that mean your guess is right? Of course not. But it's certainly plausible.

Zacky made it pretty damn clear he was certain telling the guys would've lead to them being added to the hit list back in the big pack. That can be counted on for Zacky being selfless then. Or he could have been warned and threatened, of course. I'm sure at least one of them did say something along those lines. It's after he left that it certainly couldn't be counted on, you're right. Although, would it have really mattered? Like Zacky said, they couldn't have done anything. No one in the pack would've batted an eyelash. Perhaps Ava doesn't care about the the guys' friendship as much as she appears to? Zacky's certainly suggested as much, especially because she doesn't seem to show up very much other than when it's convenient for her.

And I'm sorry! I missed it completely! (I blame it on the fact that I was still slightly drunk!) So, the answer you've been waiting for: No comment. We had Matt's point of view on this, not Zacky's. Matt can't know if it's the same thing or not. And even if it's not the same thing, it could have been something related to it, remember. Zacky probably was not going to say all that he said to Matt then, when he was sober and thinking clearly. But be tempted to say something along the lines of 'Ava's a fucking lying bitch and you don't know what you're talking about'? Certainly a possibility. More surprises? Hell to the yes; the story's not over! We still don't know who the person on the phone was, and what the documents are, or what Drake's plans are! Of course there will be more surprises.

It’s okay. I understand that is why I didn’t bother you. :) Yeah I was a bit surprised when I found out what happened to Zacky! I thought I had at least another chapter till we found out and the BOOM! Talk about a smack in the face. And sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you with this, I’ve had homework so yeah I can understand being busy. Oh and prepare yourself this is a long one!

Yeah I was so upset about this chapter that I actually had to go read from Synacky fluff to make myself feel better! I understand you would be happy (it’s the mark of a good writer to evoke such emotions from their readers) so don’t worry about it. There is no need to apologize. It’s just that I have a soft spot for Zacky in this story and to have read what happened to him damn near killed me! The fact that he kept it to himself and carried that weight all by himself only made it worse.

True we did get a little bit of info there.

Yeah asking if she was in heat was really weird too but I was so damn mad last night when I was typing my comment that I didn’t feel like adding any adlib. I didn’t think that she had to be in heat to be aroused it was just so random and out of the blue. Before I got so upset and changed my whole comment, I had written that I know that hot tubes can be arousing for some people. I was just wondering if it was the beginnings of it and Zacky had ‘freaked’ (gotten pissed because it was one more thing he was going to have to deal with) and left. Also in chapter 29 Matt even says that Ava will so into heat, “She is going to go into heat, Zacky, and I’d guess pretty soon.” And Zacky did say this: “Yeah, I know. With all of the shit we’ve already got going on, of course there has to be her goddamn heat to think about on top of it all.” So you can see how I could draw that conclusion right?

Here is a question that has got me wondering something: did Brian know about Ava’s brothers torturing Zacky? (I don’t expect you to tell me, but I thought I’d let you know where my head is at) I mean Brian is a pureblood, so wouldn’t he know? I’m going to say this, if Brian didn’t know then Ava doesn’t deserve him and better stay the fuck away from him!!! If he did know, they deserve each other and should both go jump off a cliff! (And I would never say that about Brian but if he knew about Zacky and didn’t do something about it, which I’m having a hard time believing but you never know, I would never be able to forgive him!)

Again my bad on my wording! I meant that Matt was suggesting that Zacky thought she was aroused because of Brian. *Nods head* Yep, that is what I meant. Trust me I know there is a difference. It’s just last night I was so upset I wasn’t thinking about how I was wording things.

Oh, OKAY!!! So Zacky was pissed off that Ava got all hot and bothered in the hot tube (and it wasn’t because of him) but also because she wasn’t when he was taking her as his mate. Yeah I can see why that would upset him/piss him off, and now going back and rereading it, it makes sense now.

So she didn’t have feelings for him? Then why would his words have ‘bothered’ her so much that she would use them against him later on? I mean if a guy told me he liked me, made me believe him and I didn’t like him back it wouldn’t be any sweat off my back, especially if he told me later that he was repulsed by me. I’d actually be relived because I wouldn’t have to walk on eggshells around him, not that Ava would be considerate enough to tiptoe around Zacky.

No one time doesn’t seem like enough in light of what we have found out. PLEASE TELL ME HE WILL BE TAKING AVA UP ON HER OH SO GENEROUS OFFER!!! She needs to feel embarrassed! It’s a small kind of justice in my eyes, not enough to pay back for what has happened to him but a small victory for Zacky in a way.

OKAY! That makes so much more sense! I was wondering why Matt got so pissed and now I can understand why.

That is very true!

I know that is why I officially love Matt now!

Yeah it was a bit of a surprise. I think it was just because the whole pack sees her as a sister and then Matt makes the statement that she isn’t family if this is how she really is. Especially with this: “He loved her like a sister, he really did, and that wasn’t something that just vanished.” Then he turns around and says she’s not family. I get why he feels that way he does I just didn’t think that he would “disown” her. Honestly though I’m glad that Matt is on Zacky’s side! It was just a bit of a surprise.

Oh my god! You are PURE FUCKING EVIL!!!! Are you “saying” (suggesting) that Ava was paid to come to the pack? (Of course you won’t answer this so I don’t even know why I’m asking) If that were so then she is an elitist! That would explain why Drake would have expected her to have mated with Brian and come ‘home.’ Because he PAID her to! I can’t see Drake paying her to mate with Zacky. That doesn’t make any sense to me, but paying her to mate with Brian, that does. Then the packs supposed solution to the other werewolves wouldn’t have worked and Matt, Zacky, and the rest would have to find a new home (if they could) as well as get a new beta, and they in turn would need a mate (because Brian and Ava would have left the pack). It’s pure fucking genius!!! But honestly I didn’t think that you would give me a ‘hint’ or suggestion.

Oh good! Like I said I really want to see Brian’s reactions. I’m also curious to see what Johnny’s would be. Oh and I can’t wait to see what happens when Matt tells Kat!!! Now that is one reaction I know I want to read about! XD

Well reading some of the comments it appears that the Ava cheerleaders are still hopeful for her. I don’t know why but they are.

I have a question though (and I can’t believe I’m asking this), did Ava really send her brothers or did they find out and take action themselves? This was a thought that kept running through my mind when I was reading and rereading the chapter. You know I’ve been taking the story’s title into consideration and I’m wondering that if Zacky had said something to her about it he would have found out that it didn’t really happen the way he thought. That her brothers found out and took the actions they deemed necessary, and when asked about it by her brothers she had told them that she had planned on telling them and then went along with everything afterwards to save her own skin. It still wouldn’t be forgivable by any means but at least she wouldn’t be directly responsible for what happened. I don’t know why I’m even asking this though; I honestly don’t want to redeem Ava.

What I am wondering though is what the fuck was Ava thinking? If the guys had found out what she had done (directly or indirectly) they never would have forgiven her! I mean if Zacky had died (which was the plan apparently) then it could easily have been swept under the rug (hunters did it, that is what Matt thought after all), but Zacky didn’t die. So how was she so sure that Zacky wouldn’t tell? They couldn’t possibly have guessed that he would be selfless would they? Did she (or her bothers) threaten him to remain silent (you know, “If you tell then it will only endanger them” or something like that)? I mean Ava isn’t stupid so she would want to cover her ass. I just don’t get it! I can’t wrap my mind around her risking her friendships with the guys in such a way. It don’t make sense to me.

Also I asked this but I didn’t get an answer or comment so I’ll re-ask it: Is what Zacky confessed to Matt (what Ava indirectly did to him), what he was going to tell Matt in his office? Or is there more that we don't know about? Because I remember in 29 Zacky did seem like he was going to say something. Here is what I mean: “You need to get some shit straightened out with her before that happens.” Another moment of silence later, and the guitarist opened his mouth, green eyes filled with some emotion that Matt couldn’t identify. But rather than say whatever was obviously on his mind, the shorter man shook his head and focused his gaze into an irritated glare down at the desk.” So yeah I’m just wondering if there are going to be any more surprises or is this it?

I know; I've been awfully busy, and I probably should've gotten back to you on the comment like days ago. It's been a busy week, though, and next week will honestly be busier. Especially now that I'll be trying to write the next chapter, since, you know, this was supposed to be the next chapter. But I stand by my drunken decision. xD The in-between chapter wouldn't have been necessary.

And I am not able to word this correctly, so I apologize in advance -- but I'm happy to hear that this chapter affected you so much. Obviously, I'm not happy that you cried, but I mean, I'm happy that you care enough about the story to cry -- that it was able to get to you like that.

I figured the beginning would be very confusing; I apologize for that. But, I mean, a lot of things we learn in this story are conversations that reveal things that happened in the past, and some of those things are revealed in such a vague way that we get zero details at all, and at least Matt and Zacky covered a little bit more than that about the hot tub scene.

And I know, it did seem like some of the conversations we've had before. And that should show you how on-track some of our convos had been. This chapter was written before I even posted this story for the first time; this was just one of the ones that I already knew was going to happen a certain way. Of course, I've gone through it and altered sentences and added details and what not, but the majority of the sentences haven't been touched at all.

Zacky stormed off because he got pissed off that she was aroused. That phrasing sounds so awkward, but I can't think of a better way to say it. They're werewolves -- they can tell when one of them gets hot and bothered, even if only a little bit. She's not in heat, at least not at that specific moment. It's not like she needs to be in heat to get aroused, after all. I won't answer your question about if it involved Brian at all. That's obviously a possibility, but it's also completely possible that it was random, or that whatever they were talking about at the time lead to her thinking about something that aroused her. I mean, really, random little unimportant, non-sexual things can arouse people. Or, hell, talking about a movie can remind you of how attractive an actor is or something. It's kind of a miracle this sort of thing hasn't happened before. But, for the record, Matt wasn't technically suggesting that she was aroused because of Brian; he was technically suggesting that Zacky thought she was -- there's a difference there that you should be aware of.

How'd they go from A to B? It's what Zacky was pissed about, what he was thinking about at the moment and what he drunkenly decided to share. It's not a direct connection, per say, but it's there. Matt figured it out, but it took him a while to get there, remember. Ava was aroused earlier in the hot tub; she wasn't when Zacky was taking her -- then, she only turned her head away and wouldn't look at him.

Yeah, it's a not-being-a-pureblood thing. And, evidently, a used-to-like-her thing. It's about Ava, but it's also about the general napoleonic-complex thing he's got going on about being a 'mutt', too.

When she was eighteen, he convinced her that he liked her and was attracted to her only to then tell her all of those nasty things about how it was funny that she could even believe that, because he was completely repulsed by her and blah blah blah. There's a slight difference than if he had convinced her to have feelings for him; that wasn't what happened. If she actually did like him and have those feelings, that's a whole different game he could play. Plus... one time doesn't really seem like enough, you know?

Matt's talking about how he thinks Zacky's gotten enough revenge, just by taking her as his mate. He gets to say fuck you to all of the purebloods, and he spites Ava in the process. 'That' isn't a specific thing, just the whole napoleonic complex thing I was talking about. So yeah, you're on the right track.

Zacky's just talking about feeling like he's never going to be good enough for /anyone/, because he's the 'mutt'. He's talking about Ava and her contempt, and he's talking much more generally than that at the same time. The comment pissed Matt off, remember, because it's not like Zacky's being told that he's 'just a stupid mutt' or anything, not by the pack. Of course, Zacky probably just meant it as a 'how can I forget what I /am/' kind of comment, but that's certainly not how it came off at first.

And Matt said those things before Zacky revealed what she'd done, remember. It sounds like a better-than-necessary punishment before you know that it's not enough. Hindsight's 20/20.

I think Matt agrees with you one hundred percent. And I know, Zacky broke my heart a little bit with that line, too. And Matt didn't just brush it aside, don't worry. Those selfless things definitely affected him.

Was Matt's reaction really a surprise? Do you mind if I ask you why you think that?

You know I'm not going to reveal Ava's reasoning, but I'm glad you're telling me what you think it could be! Her reasoning could have been many things, like that, like she really just didn't want to take a human because she looks down so much at that, like she's got something else up her sleeve, or like she got paid fifty million dollars to do that.

...oops. Was that supposed to be hinted at?

The guys'll find out, and you'll see their reactions, don't worry. It's a few chapters out, at least, though -- that's for sure.

And as much as I'm sure you're regretting feeling sorry for her -- just imagine what the Ava Cheerleaders are thinking right now. I certainly warned everyone that no one was perfect in this story, and especially not Ava.

Going back and rereading what happened, I can now see that it a very fucked up situation. So yeah I’m with you I can’t really blame him but at the same time there is no way I can condone his actions.

Exactly! When my mother found out about how it went down she tried to feel bad for me, and I was like, “Oh no Mom you don’t get it I’m glad it happened this way.” She thought I was crazy, but I think it worked out for me in the end. I don’t regret it so that is all that counts.

--

XD Very nice!!!

--

Oh they would! I’d kick them both in the ass!!! Just because they are werewolves doesn’t mean that I’m scared of them. XD

Why thank you! I have been told that a lot.

What is it with everyone wanting to be a teacher? It’s like everyone that I meet here on this site wants to be a teacher. Well I understand making sure that people consider all the alternatives. Sometimes I feel like you give me an alternative just to get me lost though. XD

No it’s okay but I just wanted to make sure that you didn’t think I was thinking that, that’s just a little to far off.

LOL!!! That is awesome! I swear I won’t tell a soul that you laughed so hard you fell out of your chair! Yeah it was a pretty epic conversation, they don’t happen very often but when they do they are awesome!!!

Oh yeah I forgot he said that.

Well that little insight into Johnny was interesting! You see I thought that he had a soft spot for Ava so therefore he would be protective of her as well. In fact if I had to choose someone from the pack who would have that thought process I would have thought it would be Matt.

I guess you have a point there. I didn’t really think of it that way.

I know, and get it why she did what she did with Drake I was just saying… XD

--

Well thanks! XD

Very, very true. He certainly was drunk, and that played such a big role that it probably wouldn't have even happened had he been sober. But, at the same time, and I had to reread Chapter Seven to remember exactly what we learned was going through his head, even in his intoxicated state, he knew he was hurting her way more than necessary. While I completely don't blame him, I also can't... condone his behavior. Just my personal opinion. He knew she was a virgin. Hell, he could smell her blood. The fact that he was making it painful for her pleased him. Again, I don't blame him, I just think it's safe to say it was pretty much a dick thing to do -- no pun intended.

And at least he felt bad! That's more than a lot of guys would have, I think. But yeah, you're right, that definitely does save a lot of embarrassment and... well, pressure. Minus the suckiness associated with the lack of finesse, it actually seems like a decent plan. No illusions of being in love, and no real pressure.

--

And yeah, I think most people do fuck off their first year in college (if not their entire college career...) but, like you, I am definitely the exception. It's just harder to find other exceptions over here than it was back home. And that's no big deal, really, because I am totally up for getting drunk some nights, but I keep it classy. xD

--

Haha, I can totally see you trying to sit them both down and get their sides of the story, but I honestly don't think either of them would tell you a thing. xD I think they'd both just look at you, then at each other, and just laugh and blow you off. If Brian and Matt don't even know, they're not talking to anyone. But maybe you should be a marriage counselor! I think you'd probably excel at that.

xD

Yeah, I kind of know. xD But I'm evil for a reason. I'm going to be a teacher; I can't help it that I like to make sure people are considering all of the alternatives before making their decisions! Plus, with some people, I feel like if I didn't offer alternatives, they'd be so unprepared to learn that their guess was wrong that they would just be... lost.

Ohhh oh ohoh; I misunderstood what you were saying. Sorry! Yeah, we're totally on the same page now; I hear you.

OH MY GOD THAT IS HILARIOUS! (And your sister sounds weird. Cool, but weird. xD) And holy crap, Synyster Cyrus? I was honestly just leaning back so far in my chair as I laughed hysterically that I totally fell over. You will not tell a soul that happened! xD

And fair enough. That logically makes sense, because there definitely is a positive side to Ava's having a mate that doesn't want to actually mate with her. And she's definitely trapped him, yeah. Hell, he's said that was one of the things he was happy about -- having trapped her for her whole life -- too.

I know it seems like they take her side more than his, but I think that's partially my fault, because of the selective highlighting I've been doing. Day to day unimportant things aren't really shown at all, and that would probably be where the guys sided with Zacky more. They just side with Ava when they feel the need to be protective of her. Their best friend just mated with their "younger sister". They've got the overprotective thing down. (Just imagine what would have happened to a guy that wasn't Zacky!!) But I know, it's not fair. And Brian's already complained about how he hates being in the middle and whatnot. However, if Zack went ahead and took Ava up on her offer, they'd probably work it out so that the guys didn't find out. They can always try and mask scents. And she would help him there, because she's embarrassed about the whole situation and wouldn't want the guys to know. Of course, if they found out, she really wouldn't step in, but just shrug it off. And you're right, the guys would -- for the most part -- not really care about the arrangement made, because they'd still see it as disrespectful. Minus Johnny. Don't ask me why I spent the time a few chapters back sitting down and thinking over exactly how the guys would all react. But Johnny would be the one to be all "wait... I know we don't agree, but isn't it more Ava's opinion that matters? And if she's not upset, doesn't that mean maybe we should let it be?"

I don't know that it's hypocritical, but it's certainly fucked up. I think it logically makes sense, because she does love Brian, so she would care more about his happiness. And Zack did the same thing, remember. He didn't want to trap a random human into a life of being 'mated to the mutt' (and he had other reasons, of course), but he didn't mind trapping Ava. Why would he?

That's definitely very true. She looks pretty hypocritical, there. But I think there's a difference between most people and Drake. Drake poses an actual, very real threat, and she didn't seem to want to poke that bear, not when it meant causing trouble for the pack. Could she actually have not wanted to mention it because she wasn't proud? Hell yeah. I'm just noting the possibility. You make a good argument.

--

And aw, thank you! You're pretty damn cool yourself, you know! (:

Well let me just say this on behalf of Zacky. He was drunk and well that has to play a big role in what happened that night. Like I said, it literally felt like you had just written my first time having sex. The guy was drunk, I was sober, and it was a giant suck fest!!! (Not literal sucking though! Thank god! *Shudders*) There was absolutely no finesse! And secondly Zacky felt like he was being backed into a corner. He was being ‘pushed’ by Matt to get a mate, and then here comes Ava pushing from the other side. What does Ava do when she is backed into a corner? She lashes out! What did Zacky do? He lashed out his anger and aggression on Ava. Can I blame him? No.

It’s okay I’m over it. I honestly didn’t expect my first time to be all romantic and perfect and shit, but I wish there had been more finesse. When he found out I was virgin he actually felt bad and tried to make it up to me. But yeah I’m glad that it all happened the way it did because then it saved me that very embarrassing period of sever infatuation. I didn’t really like the guy and he was honestly one of the last people I would have wanted to lose my virginity to, so once it was all said and done I did feel like I was in love and going to get married and live happily ever after and shit. I was fortunately saved from that disillusion.

--

Oh I know but I’m sitting here reading everything and I’m like, “I want to go!!!” But it’s okay, it’s a good jealousy (if that makes any sense). XD

That is awesome! Well they are freshmen. Isn’t it true that most people fuck off their first year in college? I mean I’m a nerd so I am obviously the exception to the rule, plus I don’t live in a dorm or in a sorority or whatever. EWWW! That is just wrong!!! Yeah well now that you said that I can see why you feel the way you do! That is fucked up.

That has got to be so cool!! You have such an awesome opportunity to meet so many different people and learn different things, ideas, and points of views!

--

Oh yeah, I’m the one everyone comes to, to solve arguments and debates because I can see the different angles, points of view, feelings, and opinions of others. I’m very open minded too so that helps. What I really want to do with your story if it were real and possible would be to sit down with both Ava and Zacky (both separately and together) and get their sides of the story then sit down and explain to each of them how the other feels. This would save us all a lot of drama! XD Maybe I should be a marriage counselor?

Yeah a selfish reason!

Yeah I learned fast not to take everything you say at face value. You like to propose ideas (or alternatives) but they are just that, ideas. And then be all evasive and shit after the fact. Like I have said a thousand times over, YOU my friend are PURE EVIL!!! XD

NO! I didn’t mean it that way (I know he doesn’t have feeling feelings for her). What I meant was that he is obviously having feelings (from his instincts and the mating bond), added to those feelings he is having trouble controlling what he is feeling. This can easily turn into feeling feelings for her, especially if they were to engage in that whole casual sex relationship thing.

Well maybe you’re not as evil as I have said you are. :) Thanks for that by the way.

Okay so first let me explain that my sister and I go off on really weird tangents sometimes. One minute can be talking about baby penguins and the next minute we are talking about our favorite Smurf! So here is the gist of our conversation/argument:
She ended up sharing a picture of some guy with his face all tattooed and pierced (it was fucking creepy!!!). So I asked why people do this to themselves and said something along the lines of Darwin being right about survival of the fittest. So then my sister replied that she liked her piercing but it was “above and beyond the call of stupidity” and I told her that I loved it and would have to use that sometime. Her reply back was that it was just her being awesome, to which I replied that it was very true and how could I have forgotten this. She went on to say that it was a sin amongst her loyal subjects! (And yes this is all very important to get to the real point of this story so bear with me) So I told her that I bought her A7X ticket so therefore I should be forgiven. This didn’t seem to be enough because she replied with a “we shall see.” I ended up giving her an ultimatum! Forgive me or I’ll find someone else to take with me to the concert. She mentioned paying the Warped Tour tickets but that all was forgiven. I ended up reminding her that we were even so she needed to stop holding that over my head. :) Her reply was “fine whatever you say.” I of course took this as a victory so here was my reply: “Ha!!! I win! I didn't want to have to pull out my trump card next so it is good that you conceded defeat because NOTHING beats my trump card!” Now because my sister is weird here was her reply: “I didn't want to argue with a MEER subject. The duchess finds it beneath herself to argue.” Fucking weirdo!!! So my argument was that she was born to a ‘meer’ commoner in the U.S. of A and not some Duke of York in England. Also if she was a duchess then that meant that I was one too since we were sisters. Her response was a picture of Freddy Mercury riding on a tiger in space with the caption “Your argument is invalid” underneath. So this is what I said:
“Okay I didn't want to have to do this but here goes, ZACKY motherf***ing VENGEANCE!!! This is my trump card! There is no beating it so just admit that I win and all right with the world again. I have held council with my peers and they all agree, nothing beats a Zacky Vengeance in any argument no matter what it is about!”
Yeah my peers being you!!! XD
So she posted the Freddy pic again and said this does. I told her that she had been sadly misinformed. She was like its FREDDY! Freddy is the king of all! And I love what she said next! “I AM BUT A SIMPLE PAWN IN HIS GAME OF AWESOMENESS, YOU ARE BUT YET A PAWN AS WELL.” LOL!!! So yeah I shared this pic and asked, “You’re telling me this” the picture of Zacky (which is one of my favorites by the way) doesn’t beat this?”
She went on to say that Freddy is the queen and I told her he liked it up the butt. XD Next thing I know she is sharing a picture of Syn’s new hair. I told her it was growing on me, but her response was pretty epic, “I have a nickname for him... Synyster Cyrus... Miley’s long lost twin brother.” I of course laughed my ass off but told her that I was going to tell Papa Gates on her and she would get a royal beat down! I then tried to use Andy from Black Veil Brides (who has almost the exact same haircut) against her. But yeah that was how it went down. If you are still reading this you are very brave! XD

Well of course she wouldn’t regret having a mate that hates her guts (she is a cold hard unfeeling bitch). Because he hates her that means he won’t want to ‘mate’ with her, saving her of actually having a mate. And because she is mated to someone who hates her (and who she equally hates) she has effectively trapped him from ever having the chance to mate with someone he could be happy with (you know the reason why she didn’t mate with Brian) therefore making his life a living hell.

You are correct in that statement but it sucks when his friends LOVE to take Ava’s side all the time (it may not be all the time, I’m exaggerating here). Brian jumps to Ava’s defense all the time and I can honestly see The Berrys, Johnny, and even Matt doing so as well. This ends up leaving Zacky as the odd man out (and this is why I like Kat so much, because she has Zacky’s back). I really hope he does! But then Brian will try and kick his ass again and then I will end up hating Brian (I can’t win for losing). But seriously if Zacky were to have sex with someone and everyone found out, who would actually side with him? I don’t think any of the pack would. And what pisses me off is they wouldn’t take into consideration that Ava is putting out and he is a dude (as well as a dude who is used to getting some) therefore the only logical solution would be to find someone who is willing to put out! They would think along the lines of how Brian thought, he just disrespected our friend so we need to beat the crap out of him. Of course Ava ‘may’ try and explain that she and Zacky have an agreement, but will that really stop Brian or the rest from kicking his ass? In Chapter 23 Zacky called his ass beating a ‘reminder’ of the others not tolerating any ‘disrespect’ towards their ‘little sister’. So even though they have this agreement between them wouldn’t be a bit of a Catch 22??? Maybe that is why she made the agreement, it got Zacky off her back (literally), and if he did actually do it then he would get his ass kicked the next day (and she certainly doesn’t seem to mind that he gets hurt).

Which is why I hate her guts! (No I didn’t forget that at all, I promise) It is such a fucked up and hypocritical thing to do, “I love Brian so therefore I won’t trap him in being suck with me for the rest of his life but I sure as hell don’t have a problem trapping Zacky in a life of misery with me.”

No I remember that conversation but when it came time to reveal what she had done to her brother, she pretended that Brian was her mate and not Zacky. So much for being proud that she was ‘scratched off the tree’ (don’t get me wrong I get why it went down the way it did but I’m just trying sort of disprove your argument). XD

--

You have got to be the coolest person that I have ever met, and I love you for that!!! That sounds more than fair!

It is whatever if you want to message me or leave a comment it doesn’t matter. Whatever works or is easiest for you. :) Thank you so much! You are AWESOME!!!

Yeah, exactly; even though it wasn't... I think she described it as not "mutually satisfying"?... it definitely still was consensual, and absolutely not rape. Plus, I mean, come on! How many first times are ever really mutually satisfying in the first place? I mean, obviously Zacky was actually pretty terrible about how purposefully rough he was -- he really didn't need to be that cruel, because he knew what the fuck he was doing -- but yeah, it is what it is and it's definitely not rape. And I'm sorry to hear that's how your first time went down, but most people I know had pretty similar stories of it sucking. I don't know why girls expect it to be perfection and awesomeness and whatever.

--

Haha, I wasn't trying to make you jealous! I was just answering your question! You definitely need to find a way here, because I think you'd absolutely love it.

Eh, being in school here isn't different, really, than being in school in the States. It's just... the classes are geared a little differently, and, for me, my classes (which are all fourth-year classes) actually seem easier than my first-year classes back home. But I think I might be the exception to the rule; a lot of others have said he opposite.

I'm a hundred percent serious; that totally happened the other night. And I mean, yeah, that was amusing as hell and I very much loved those drunk Irishmen... but, at the same time, I think the majority of the first years need to calm the fuck down. Like, you're in college to have a good time, for sure, and you should definitely get drunk with your buddies, but let's keep it a little bit tasteful. You know what you can handle; I shouldn't wake up to find three people passed out in my kitchen, two of which are in their own vomit. Come on, now.

And no, they are not all chicks. One other American girl, one Spanish guy, and two other Irish guys. There are plenty of study abroad and ERASMUS (the EU equivalent) here, a good number from the States, yes. I think over 10% of the student population is international?

--

And that's a very smart way to read the story! And approach life, really. I think some of the other readers could definitely benefit from taking a step back and trying to view it from different angles, like you do.

True, true; that definitely makes sense. And of course, she is a shady person. She hides things, usually with at least a reason, but not necessarily a good one.

Hahaha! I'm not trying to shatter them, only keep the suspense and not spoil anything. xD But I'm glad you know better than to read too much into anything I say, since you know how careful I am not to actually confirm or deny anything. I feel like some of the other readers, whenever I suggest an alternative for them to consider, think that means I'm telling them how things actually are. They'll probably be pretty disappointed pretty quickly. xD

Good point, yeah. Though Ava wasn't trying to argue that he had feelings feelings for her; she wasn't trying to say that she thought he liked her or anything. The 'feelings' she was talking about were the instincts and the bond and whatnot. But she definitely was telling him not to get those 'feelings' confused with his actual feelings. /nods.

Yeah, it definitely would have been interesting! I considered letting you run with that for a moment, but then I figured you already had enough to speculate over and worry over, so I figured I'd cut you some slack there. xD

OH MY GOSH DID YOU REALLY!? What was the argument about? How'd she react? It's the best trump card ever!

Very true; Ava's definitely in a good position with all that happened, for sure. I just meant the whole 'stuck mated to someone who hates her guts' thing made it sound like something she would regret. But, obviously, she's said she doesn't, and she doesn't have too much reason to anyways.

Staying isn't doing him too much, you're right, but at least he's with his friends, (he's a wolf, after all, and they need their pack), and at least he has the option to go have sex. Yeah, he hasn't taken her up on that offer yet, but that's not to say he won't. And that's certainly not to say that he would ever be willing to stay celibate for the rest of his life. And your approval is noted! I think the majority of readers would agree.

Okay, I see your point about how Brian/Ava could have 'made it work' better than Zacky/Ava, and it certainly wouldn't have started a war with her brother. But... I think you're forgetting that, for Ava, it wasn't a who-would-this-work-better-with decision. She values Brian's eternal happiness more than Zacky's, so it wasn't an even choice, you know? Plus, if you recall her conversation with Matt after the whole reveal-of-them-being-mated thing, she seemed pretty happy and amused by the fact that she was considered 'scratched off the tree' and all. Zacky certainly enjoyed the giant middle finger in the air; could it be Ava did as well? But even if she had mated with Brian... the two of them were not going to take up Drake's offer, obviously. That in and of itself might have caused some major conflicts with her brother. Not nearly as major as they are now, of course, but still.

--

I enjoy our conversations, too! If I don't get updating within the holiday break where I'm literally backpacking, I will at least make it to a cafe with wifi or something for a little while so that we can still discuss different things. Fair?

And I will hop right on reading that -- though, I might have to wait until this evening or tomorrow morning, just because I am about to go out into the city for... I don't know how long. But I do promise to read and give you my honest opinion! Would you prefer me to comment on the story itself or through a message or something? Only asking because I know some people who really have a preference, and like to keep story comments only for...unsolicited? comments... so, yeah. xD

Sorry it took me so long to get back to you, I was watching World War Z with my sister. It was awesome!!! XD

No I understand that you have a hard time writing Brian but I just thought I'd make the suggestion to give him a little comedic moment. :) Cool beans!!!

Yeah we have talked about how you thought everyone would like Zacky and hate Ava (because it is a Zacky story). Yeah the way I saw it was that she is not helpless and had every chance to fight him off if it wasn’t what she wanted so it was not rape. But girls sometimes can see things that. They think that their first time is supposed to be all romantic and shit and it just doesn’t work that way. My first time was pretty much how it was for Ava, rough, raw and sucked, but I didn’t go crying rape afterwards. I know I’ve said this before but girls are stupid….”What can ya do?”

--

LOL! Yeah that would have been me! XD

Makes for a great story though!

--

Oh now I hate you!!! I want to go there so bad!!! I’ve seen pictures and I can only imagine how it would be in real life. I’m totally jealous now! Screw that crap! Your American your allowed to go see some of the tourist-y sights, but yeah I get wanting to get into the culture of the country.

I understand having to get acclimated to your new surrounding. Does it feel any different being in school there than it does here? That is so cool! Yes tell me everything! XD

Yes, that is a very good movie. NICE! Everyone loves a drunk Irishman! XD LOL! Are you serious? They really sing that all night. THAT RIGHT THERE IS PURE AWESOME!!!

Wow! Five housemates. Are they all chicks too? Have you had a chance to make any friends? (I hope so) Are there other Americans there as well? (That seems like a stupid question but I’m going to ask it anyways) :)

--

Well I try to see things from all the different perspectives and not let my bias for Zacky get too much in the way of my opinions.

Well that was because I was mad at Zacky for the mean things he said to her. It wasn’t very nice and my heart went out to Ava (for just a little bit). Oh I know that Zacky is drunk, I definitely took that into account while reading but you know I’ve always found Ava to be shady. Just because I was giving her some leeway that doesn’t mean I trusted her. And you do have a point. I mean if I was going to be stuck with someone for the rest of my life I would hope that things would work out and get better. Who wouldn’t feel that way?

No I have learned that you are the master at shattering my dreams so I’m not going to read too much into that statement. But I honestly don’t know how they are ever going to work any of their issues out to even have a remote chance of making things work. It seems like neither of them want to.

I wasn’t even trying to trap you! I swear it!! XD

Well Ava did call Zacky out on his ‘feelings’ so it is safe to assume that in the end if they were to engage in a casual sex relationship that he would be the one to develop the feelings. Like I said before it is probably a good thing that the chapter ended the way it did.

XD It would have been interesting if you had let me run down that rabbit hole. I would have been speculating who it was, why they were killed, all kinds of crap. So I will say thank you for not letting me get caught up in that tide. It’s bad enough I’m still trying to figure out what Ava did to Zacky, and what the hell those papers were that she is hiding.

Well of course I’m right on both of my arguments! XD SPEAKING OF BEING RIGHT! I used the trump card the other day on my baby sister. It was awesome!!! XD

Yeah yeah but I already told you what I think she was thinking about her new position. (She gets to be with her friends, live a good life, she doesn’t actually have to ‘mate’ with her mate, and she gets to make Zacky’s life a living hell on a daily basis!) Why wouldn’t she have any regrets?

I don’t think that leaving would do him any good but what good is staying doing for him? It’s not like he’s having sex anyways! Is Zacky ever going to take Ava up on that ‘offer’? I think he should!!! If she gets her jollies off on making his life hell, then he should make her pay a little for it.

Holy crap, I was not expecting you to have so many brilliant responses already planned out; kudos! Hell, I can't even -- while playing the devil's advocate -- think of any kind of rebuttal to most of those reasonings. Just... touché. Although... would mating with Brian have been selfless? That'd have sentenced him to an eternity of being with someone who didn't want to be his mate, and that seems pretty selfish, as well. Not that mating with Zacky was any less selfish, of course. You're right; she definitely had selfish ulterior motives to choosing to mate with him. I don't think she'd argue that she didn't. I also don't think that Zacky would argue that he didn't, though. You really hit the nail on the head in the rest of those points, though. Especially the endangering all of the guys part. They'd never blame her for it, of course, but she certainly had options besides that. She could have just gone on the run; that'd have been the selfless choice. (She certainly had the money for it, didn't she? xD)

Dude it just came to me! I swear, I thought about what you asked and then my fingers just started flying over the keyboard.

Mating with Brian…I think it would have been selfish too. I mean they clearly don’t ‘want’ to be mated to each other, so she would have been sentencing him to life with her and taking away his chances at true happiness. But they could have made it work better than her and Zacky that is for sure, and it wouldn’t have started a war with her brother. I never said that Zacky didn’t have ulterior motives. I believe it is actually in there as to why he mated with her. He would be beta over Brian the pureblood, and he “the mutt” would be mated to essentially werewolf royalty. It was a giant middle finger in the air to all those that had ever looked down on him. (His name is Zacky Vengeance for Johnny Christ’s sake!)

EXACTLY! She had ‘selfless’ choices but she didn’t take them.

That sounds reasonable but I’ll still end up being bored and wanting to talk. I enjoy our conversations. :) But hey I can wait because then you will have a crap load of stories to tell me of your travels backpacking across Europe!!! I’m so jealous.

Why thank you! I do have my moments of pure genius every once in a while. XD

XD

It is on Mibba it’s called California Moon. Be brutally honest I can handle it. No one has told me what they have thought of it so it would be nice to get an honest opinion. :)

As long as you're not expecting my Brian to be nearly as epic as the real Brian, then we're totally good and I will definitely try to fit something in somewhere... It just has to be timed well, obviously, and with some of the coming chapters, I don't know exactly where it'll fit. I will work on it, though!

I totally tried to do the same thing! I was trying to explain the epicness of those jokes to quite a few people, and they just stared back at me blankly. It turned into a "maybe you had to be there..." conversation. And those descriptions pretty much sum it all up perfectly. /nods.

It's okay, really. It was just a shock, is all! I've probably told you this before, but when I went into writing this story, I was expecting the majority of people to absolutely hate Ava and be fully on Zacky's side. I foresaw that kind of a dynamic, with perhaps a few swaying back and forth with certain chapters and events, but still. I didn't expect to have so many people like Ava from the get-go, and I especially didn't expect people to be so... passionate (?) about her wellbeing, to the extent that they wanted to defend her from imaginary threats more than even Brian did. I mean, really. Even Brian didn't cry rape after Ava spoke up and said that it wasn't. xD You're right; she's a werewolf, not a helpless little girl.

--

No offense taken! There was one woman who laughed a bit under her breath, who had been behind me in line and all, but it was all in good fun. She sent me a thumbs up and all. (:

I'm just glad I didn't have to deal with anyone actually being judgmental or anything. I mean, it's the 21st century and most people are not ridiculous jerks, but I know people who have some horror stories about finding those few assholes who would make a big deal about it, y'know? And since that didn't happen, I'm totally fine with the minor embarrassment. xD

--

You should! It truly is an experience everyone should enjoy -- especially the Cliffs of Moher. Yeah, yeah, it's a tourist-y thing to do and you definitely would want to get more into the culture and away from all of the tourist centers, but those cliffs... dear god.

And I imagine most accommodation has better heating; I think I just got dealt an unlucky hand. Don't let that stop you! (Or come in the summer or something!)

And I know! It really is the greenest place I've ever seen. Probably because of the rain. But really, everything is so vibrant and for whatever reason, everything looks so quaint and cute. Like, small town heaven with such amazing history. I hear you; NC was hugely brown and dead, too, though I'm sure not nearly as brown as Texas.

I haven't gotten to go to the stereotypical pub yet, unfortunately, because with orientation and classes starting, everything has been hugely university-focused. I mean, we have pubs on campus, and I've been to them, but that's more of a student-bar kind of feel, you know? Tomorrow night my housemate and I are hunting down a nice authentic non-touristy club in the city. Limerick city! I will report back to you on that later! xD

I totally caught the P.S. I Love You reference!! One of my favorite movies! Unfortunately, no. But I have met plenty of drunk Irish freshmen, if that counts? xD But really, despite the cliche, that's really who I've met so far. I image things will look up hugely as soon as the freshmen realize they are actually in school and need to not be walking around in mobs singing 'Come Out Ye Black and Tans' all night. I'll report back on that later, as well. xD

Dorms are specifically an American phenomenon. The rest of the world, as far as I am aware, is more houses or apartments that are shared, where everyone does have their own bedroom. I'm on school accommodation that is considered on-campus, but it's like a little townhome in a village of townhomes, and I have five housemates.

--

I know, believe me! I had hoped things would get better within that chapter, even, but it just didn't work out. I'm glad you understand why it couldn't have, though! I always appreciate you being able to look at things like that objectively and subjectively.

Haha, I find it so interesting that you have that very strong opinion of her, yet up until this chapter you were actually liking her! I mean, I hear what you're saying, and I don't at all mean that in a bad way -- I just find it interesting. And if it helps you to understand, Zacky is drunk and bitter; he exaggerates a bit. I understand your point about his naiveté (naivety?) now, though. Just remember that his belief could have been more hope than belief. Perhaps having to do with the mating bond?

And I'm glad you understood what he meant by the "make things work" comment. There's still time before the story's end, of course, so don't get too disheartened. And don't try to read anything into that statement, either, because my reminding you that there is still time for things to change does not in any way mean to imply things would have to change positively, or negatively. I will not fall into any of your traps and give away any kind of ending or outcome! xD

You're totally right. Trying to have a purely physical relationship doesn't usually work out in the end, because nearly always, at least one person develops feelings. But they all usually think it can work out despite that fact, don't they? Not to mention some are capable of making that work. Very, very few, but still. And you make a good point about it being Zacky that develops feelings; she certainly did say that, and in a particularly harsh way, didn't she?

What Ifs really are a bitch. But, of course, I totally understand why you wonder about them. I wonder about them. Hell, I'm sure everyone in the pack wonders about them. I just don't know how to accurately answer them even if I wanted to be completely straight forward. xD

Haha, I totally understand why you were wondering if there was an actual grave! It made me laugh when I read it, but I do completely understand where you were coming from. No literal skeletons, though, no. Thank god for that.

You're right, of course. He's a wolf. He can't. And yeah, that's kind of exactly what she was telling him to do. She's an 'unfeeling bitch' because she compartmentalizes things too well, and, yeah, that's what she was suggesting he learn to do. And you're also right about how that worked out for her. Though, be careful, because she wouldn't necessarily say that she thinks she ended up in a poor position, would she? What'd she tell Brian about not having regrets, again?

I hear where you're coming from, but would leaving do him much better? Then he certainly couldn't ever have sex again, not while he was mated to Ava and without her around to help him out. And adding more distance between them might only make him more restless, according to Matt's analysis of the whole situation. That's a good thing to wonder about. Obviously, I won't answer on Zacky's behalf, but it's definitely a good question to keep in mind.

Holy crap, I was not expecting you to have so many brilliant responses already planned out; kudos! Hell, I can't even -- while playing the devil's advocate -- think of any kind of rebuttal to most of those reasonings. Just... touché. Although... would mating with Brian have been selfless? That'd have sentenced him to an eternity of being with someone who didn't want to be his mate, and that seems pretty selfish, as well. Not that mating with Zacky was any less selfish, of course. You're right; she definitely had selfish ulterior motives to choosing to mate with him. I don't think she'd argue that she didn't. I also don't think that Zacky would argue that he didn't, though. You really hit the nail on the head in the rest of those points, though. Especially the endangering all of the guys part. They'd never blame her for it, of course, but she certainly had options besides that. She could have just gone on the run; that'd have been the selfless choice. (She certainly had the money for it, didn't she? xD)

Oh, no worries at all! We're in really different timezones now, anyways, so that's easily expected. I actually had a really late class for the last three hours, too, so... yeah. And I will try so very hard not to disappear for two weeks again! Though... that might not be avoidable around the winter holidays and all; I'm literally backpacking and I don't know if I'll have internet access at all. Perhaps by then it'll be a nice little break between this story and the sequel?

And HOLY CRAP, why the hell have I never thought of that!?! I just copied and pasted yours as well so that I could respond without the hassle of constantly having to find your place, and it is so much easier! I love your brilliance!

And I know I don't have to thank you, but I can't not. xD

Of course! I will happily read it and let you know! That's honestly no problem at all, and I'd love to. (: It's on Mibba now, then?

Yeah so looking at how long your message is I would say yeah. XD This is going to be fun!

I just could not stop laughing at Brian! He was so on his game that day. I’m just saying that if you get the chance try and throw in some of that humor (I know it will be hard to capture that epicness) in. He was just too awesome for his own good that day.

Oh I know! I was dying!!! I tried telling these stories to my sister who just looked at me like I was crazy because I was laughing so hard. Yeah Brian, Johnny, and Arin (at least when he talked, which wasn’t very much) were the funny ones, Zacky was the angry crazy one (but I loved it!) and then there is Matt all chill and shit.

:P

That is just ridiculous!!! I’m so sorry that you had to deal with that crap. I just don’t know where they would get that idea, it was her idea to begin with, and if she didn’t want to ‘mate’ with Zacky then she could have easily fought him off. She is a werewolf for Johnny Christ’s sake!!! She is not some helpless woman who found herself in a bad situation. Furthermore she could have easily cried out for Brian or Matt and Zacky would no longer be breathing, simple as that.

--

Agreed! I thank my military family for that one.

Nice!

Oh man I would have been laughing my ass off! No offense but if I had been in line and within hearing range of that conversation, I would be THAT person that laughs. XD

--

Well now I’m really jealous of you!!! Mark my words one of these days I will make it to Ireland to see for myself. However being as I am from Texas and don’t handle the cold very well, I don’t know how I would be able to handle those kinds of living situations.

Oh my God it’s so green!!! I don’t think I’ve ever seen grass that green before. What would I give to be there right now! We are in the middle of our dry season (though it is always dry here) and so everything is brown, dry, and dying.

Tell me more! Have you had the chance to go to a pub yet? Have you gotten to meet any sexy Irishmen while walking the country (Yes that was P.S. I Love You reference). Are you living in a little cottage or are you in a dorm room? Where are you at in Ireland, Dublin, Kerry, Galway, or Limerick???

--

I know, I just… damn it had hoped that things would get better between the two not worse. But you’re right Zacky was drunk and therefore it could only go bad for him. No I get it I do really, if it had ended any differently with Ava I would have been writing you asking why Ava’s character was changing. Like I said I had hoped that thing would get better for them (more Zacky and anything else).

I know and I was so happy to be able to catch him with his guard down.

Yeah but even the idea of Ava being remotely self sacrificing (even just a little bit) and not having ulterior motives is preposterous! I just don’t see how Zacky could have ever believed different, especially since he thinks the worst of her. That is what I meant by him being naïve.

No I know that the whole “make things work” didn’t mean they would get married, have kids, and live happily ever after. I guess I just thought that over time they would work from tolerating each other to maybe one day (in a very distant future) having something that resembled a normal mating relationship. I think I had my hopes set too high for them. Now…I don’t think is much hope for Zacky. I’m beginning to see where Brian was coming from when he was talking to Ava. They have officially screwed themselves from ever having the chance to choose a mate that they would actually what to be with for the rest of their lives.

Yeah you just about summed how I’m feeling about all of this up perfectly.

That’s true. I just thought it was interesting that he was thinking that he didn’t have any ‘desire’ to essentially be with her, but he was trying to seduce her. But you are very correct in your argument; Zacky gets his jollies off without having to deal with the whole ‘cheating’ thing even though he may not want to sleep with Ava. And yeah you can have sex without feeling anything for the other person but after a period of feelings eventually get involved. Just thinking about all this makes me sad now. Because if Zacky and Ava were to engage in just an agreement, Zacky would be the one to end up having feelings for Ava, while the cold hard bitch would care less about it. Which she has already proven with her statements to Zacky at the end of the chapter: “I can be embarrassed about that and still absolutely not want to fuck you. I can feel an urge to be protective and still not be even remotely concerned with your well-being. Just like I can sleep easier when I’m near you and still not even slightly like it.” Maybe it’s a good thing that the chapter ended up happening the way it did, it may end up saving Zacky a lot of heartache later on.

Oh okay will I just wanted to make sure I had it right.

Yeah I figured that out once I went back and re-read it several times carefully. He should be kicking himself for thinking that she would have something that wasn’t for her own selfish needs. And I kind of figured that the alcohol would be affecting where his headspace was.

Yeah I kind of figured it would be a hard question to answer. XD I guess you’re right though, it would mean that both characters would be different and/or it would be a different story. What ifs are a bitch and I shouldn’t even be wondering about them.

Oh well I was just wondering. So there is no literal skeleton in a closet somewhere, got it.

Okay. So there is no ‘switch,’ got it! But how can he ignore his instincts??? He’s a wolf for Johnny Christ’s sake! Their instincts make them what they are. So basically she wants him to become an unfeeling bastard like she is an unfeeling bitch then. Yeah they may be able to choose how they react but look at how well that has worked out for her. She ends up with a mate who hates her fucking guts.

So maybe Zacky should just leave. If he can’t relax because of everything that is going on, maybe he would be better off that way. I wonder if he is regretting making the decision to mate with Ava now? Ava said she didn’t but I wonder how Zacky is feeling. Like I said Brian’s point is really starting to hit home now.

YES! That girl does not have a selfless bone in her body. It’s like she is always think of what she can get out of everything. Think about it. She didn’t mate with Brian even though it would have been easier because then she would have to actually be his mate (being selfish), she deciceds that mating with Zacky would be better because she wouldn’t have to actually be his mate and she could make his life a living hell (deep down I think that she was thinking this when she made the suggestion) so again that is her being selfish. She only agreed to help Zacky (with the tea) to get Brian and Matt off her back and so she wouldn’t actually have to ‘mate’ with him (selfish), she agreed to help Zacky if he brought someone home so she again wouldn’t have to mate with him and to get him off her back (selfish), she purposefully keeps important information from the pack for her own reasons (the money and the papers that we know nothing about). These are just a few examples of her selfishness! Oh and of course my favorite she runs away from her old pack and runs to the guys and endangers them (and I get it, it was because she was going to die yea-da yea-da yea-da, it’s still selfish). She choses to mate with Zacky knowing full well that it is going to cause problems (drama queen and selfish) when she could have easily mated to Brian and things wouldn’t be nearly as bad as they are now. Do I really need to go on??? And as far as the sleeping thing is concerned, I did say that while they may be able to sleep without the other would it be as peaceful or as restful if they were sleeping alone? But the fucked up part of it all was that she made Zacky think that he owed her for helping him sleep that is the selfish part. She was sleeping and getting Zacky to pay her back with favors. SELFISH!!! She could have easily told him from the beginning all he needed to do was compartmentalize his instincts but no what the hell would she get out of that. Now she has Zacky talking her up to Kat, buying her expensive booze, oh and walking on pins and needles so that he won’t piss her off and she decides that she wants to sleep by herself that night. So yeah that is why I think she is selfish and has ulterior motives for every ‘nice’ thing she does.

Sorry it took me so long to get this sent back to you. It took me forever to go through it all and reply to everything! XD This has got to be the longest conversation that we have ever had! Please don’t go away for so long again. :( I felt like my eyes were going to burn out at one point. I actually had to copy and paste this to word so that I could read and reply without having to do a whole bunch of scrolling. And you know you don’t have to thank me right? But you are welcome.

Hey can I ask you a favor? I started a story (it’s only two chapters) and do you think you could read it and let me know what you think? I’ve had the idea for a while but just got around to working on it. Anyways I better let you go. Hopefully I will hear from you soon. :)

Okay, this is probably going to turn out to be the most ridiculously long and convoluted message ever, so... you've been warned. I'm going to try to respond to the conversation from here, from the messages, and then from the story all at once! Because apparently I think that makes me sound like an awesome multi-tasker, when in reality it's just me being lazy and not wanting to spam the hell out of you with millions of notifications.

Haha, I absolutely died when the whole Duran Duran thing came up, too! And I can try to do something like that in the story, but I'm honestly not sure I could ever quite capture that epicness of any of the characters well enough to do something totally "them"... especially Brian. I have the hardest time with him, honestly. Actually, I lied. I have the hardest time with Jimmy, because he is just so off-the-walls awesome that I can't even comprehend it. xD But I can try, yes!

The airplane story was hilarious, too! They were all so individually awesome, with all of their different things going on. I think Matt was more laid back than he usually was, though; the others all seemed to stand out a bit more.

And of course you should have known that. xD

Yes, people most definitely cried rape. I got tons of comments and private messages about how pissed people were that Zacky "raped" Ava, and I even got a private message or two about how I was being insensitive toward rape victims by 'glamorizing' rape and making everyone shrug it off like it wasn't a big deal. I had to have a long conversation trying to explain that the reason they shrugged it off wasn't because rape wasn't a big deal, but because she wasn't raped. She consented. And then, of course, I had to get into a whole other conversation about how one cannot legally consent when he or she is under pressure and feels like they have to.... It was a mess, I tell you. A huge headache of a mess. I had to point to my little disclaimer on the summary page too many times to count.

--
Oh, the 1000 yard stare is pretty much a necessity! Everyone should learn it!

And the hockey pucks were because two of my friends (living in different states) were huge hockey fans, and wanted souvenirs from their favorite teams. So, naturally, I brought them each pucks from their not favorite teams. xD Essentially they just swapped pucks.

Yeah, the whole TSA officer thing was a pretty embarrassing situation, but at the same time funny as hell... especially now that I'm looking back on it and not having to actually re-live it. xD I mean, at least it wasn't like he was trying to purposely point it out and make a fuss about it, he just had removed the little packing cube that all of my random loose items were contained in, because that was apparently layered and hard to identify items in when it was scanned, and, of course, when he's looking at the cube and there's randomly a black bag hiding an item, he's going to have to be suspicious. I think he felt kind of bad about it after the fact, since there were people around that could totally hear the conversation and all, but it was totally awkward all around. xD

--
Ireland is totally breathtaking and unbelievably gorgeous! It really is exactly as pretty as it is depicted, if not even moreso. ...The houses are cold, though, and the heating is really old-fashioned and not really effective at all. And for whatever reason my room is colder than it even is outside at night, so it makes literally no sense. I swear my room doesn't even have heating. xD

But everything else is awesome, really! THIS IMAGE pretty much explains everything I see everywhere I go. And that picture is completely unaltered, I promise. I didn't up the saturation or anything -- the colors really are that vibrant.

--
I know, I know. The last chapter was obviously not what anyone was expecting or hoping for, I know. But... it couldn't really go any other way. Zacky was drunk, and in his drunkenness, determined to confront Ava, and she isn't one to stand down to confrontation. When I was writing this chapter for the second time (the first was just... not working, so I scrapped it), there was a point where I had to decide how Ava was going to react, and things could have ended very differently, I'm sure. But she was in a corner, and there was really only one in-character way for things to go down. So... yeah. I know it's disappointing, but it had to happen that way.

And I'm glad you were happy to see some of Zacky's thoughts for once! He's very careful about that, and usually, even in his point of view, we don't see much of his thoughts on things, or any real elaboration whatsoever. His being drunk kind of changed that. xD

He's not that naive! He didn't think for a second she'd given up her selfish ways; he only thought that perhaps there was a very very small part of her that wasn't wholly selfish. There's a big difference there, and I know he didn't make it hugely clear because he was on a drunken tangent and whatnot, but yeah. He definitely didn't think she'd magically changed or was magically a better person. He just thought that maybe, just maybe, she was capable of doing something that wasn't solely for her own benefit. And if that much was true, then he thought that there might have been a chance for them to make things work a little better than he had originally expected. And, of course, "make things work" is very subjective, and certainly relative to their own relationship. He wasn't expecting them to get along or be in any way a normal mated pair. Just... I don't know, have a bit of give and take when it came to what they /needed/ to deal with, as mates, and then otherwise be the same old little enemies they always have been. You know, like brief truces, or something. Like, agreeing not to fight a battle on Christmas, but resuming it the next day instead. I don't know.

All most certainly is right in the world! We can all breathe a sigh of relief, I guess. xD But I find it very interesting you aren't happy about it! I would've thought you'd be itching to hate her again, but I guess I definitely understand where you're coming from, especially when you hating Ava doesn't bode well for Zacky.

You're right, that comment of his definitely didn't make sense when you think about his attempted seduction of her. He clearly left certain details out of his drunken tangent, that's for sure. He picked and chose what to think about so that it suited his brooding mentality. However, that wasn't a direct contradiction. He can want to handle the issues associated with them being mates by actually, you know, mating, and all the while not want anything more than that from her. Sex doesn't always equal feelings, after all.

It's the "past crap". xD Him finding out she'd been leading him to believe she was doing him a selfless favor... yeah, that's not nearly enough to make him think that ruined any chances. Much, much worse has happened between them than a silly little thing like that.

That 'ruined chance' was a reference to the recent revelation. He was kicking himself for thinking she could have done something without a major selfish angle. And he didn't as much think she'd particularly care about his needs, but he'd thought that maybe there was a chance she might acknowledge them and be willing to be understanding of them. After all, she had given him the tea (not the recipe, obviously, but the tea itself), had helped him after the whole bartender fiasco, had agreed to help him again if he wanted to bring someone home, and had been sleeping beside him at his request. He wasn't off point in thinking that perhaps she was at least accommodating enough to deal with things that were needs related to them being mates. Again, it wasn't like he was thinking they could suddenly be friends or anything. But yes, his drunkenness definitely played a role in his thought process, at least as far as the tangents in this chapter go.

And that's a hard question to answer! (Which I'm sure you know. xD) Hell, even if I wanted to be upfront and direct about everything and even if I was happy to spoil things, I wouldn't know how to answer that. What Ifs are so tricky, you know? Did they ever have a chance to make things work? That depends entirely on what you mean by 'work', of course... Well, they sure as hell would have had a better chance if they were completely different people and actually open to sitting down and having a conversation and agreeing to leave the past in the past and blah blah blah. I mean, I don't want to deal with the What Ifs of the past. The reason things happened the way they did is because they are who they are. To try and wonder what could have happened if something different was said or done... that kind of changes who they are, you know? It'd be a different story. I really can't answer that one; I don't even know how to. xD

Hahaha, let me settle your fears: no, it's not a literal grave. That's a very entertaining idea, though, and something I probably usually would let you continue wondering about until the end of the story or until wherever it's revealed, but, alas, I'll directly answer you. xD No, they didn't actually bury anyone. No one has disappeared from the pack to have possibly been buried by them, anyways. xD

And it's not the Vampire Diaries, but I totally knew it was going to sound like that. She doesn't mean 'turn it off' in such a literal sense, like it is in TVD. She means it much more metaphorically -- she's just telling him to compartmentalize and ignore it. They can't flip a switch and ignore instincts, they can't just magically turn them off and not have to deal with them. But they can choose how to react, and whether to act on instincts or not. They can analyze an emotion, figure out if it is rational or just instinct, and then dismiss if it necessary. As she pointed out, they're not ruled by what they feel. She was just telling him to learn how to deal with his instincts and whatnot, and then learn how to compartmentalize them and not let them affect him.

The difference between Matt/Kat and Zacky/Ava just has everything to do with the individual relationships and the differences there. Matt and Kat embrace the different feelings and instincts that come with the mating bond, and they legitimately love each other on top of that. They feel more relaxed around each other because they're mates, and they're more happy around each other because of both that feeling, and their own opinions of each other. Zacky and Ava both have the mating bond affecting them, too, but they don't embrace those effects. They sleep better beside each other because they're mates, because they are more relaxed around each other. But they have also never been relaxed around each other because they hate each other, because they are literally always either actively pretending the other doesn't exist or actively antagonizing the other. Zacky said so to Matt -- he doesn't like the way he feels, he doesn't like the effects of the mating bond, and he doesn't like that a part of him wants to be around Ava. That internal conflict is exactly the opposite of relaxing. So, yeah, he's not relaxed around her, in the end. How could he be?

And I know you're pissed at Ava right now, and I can totally understand why. I would be too, if I'm being honest. But, because I like to extend our conversations and whatnot, I'm going to play the devil's advocate for a second. Is she the epitome of selfishness? Is everything she does completely selfish? Yeah, she said so herself that she can sleep easier when she's near Zacky, but she also made it perfectly clear that she can sleep without him, too. Hell, she told him that he could even sleep without her, if he just learned to compartmentalize a bit. Was her willingness to sleep beside him despite that completely selfish? Was her willingness to help him out if he wanted to go ahead and sleep with other women selfish? I don't know that things are hugely black and white, here. And, again, devil's advocate. I'm not trying to argue that she isn't selfish, obviously.

ANYWAYS, if you're even still reading this and haven't burned out your eyes or anything from reading so much (xD): THANK YOU! I really appreciate your comment, and of course, our conversation while I was at the airport -- it totally made the journey better! I'm super sorry that I took those two weeks, but I'm glad you found the chapter worth the wait!

Nah it would have been worse if I hadn't had the pain pills. COOL! I wasn't sure because their kind of small still but I like their new album.

I laughed my ass off about the whole Duran Duran thing! Oh my god!!! Can you make Brian have a moment in the story were he does something that is totally "Brian." I'm serious after watching that I need to see more humor from him. It was just too awesome! I also loved when they were talking about Miley and he was like, "At my old age anything is sexy, I'll take a wink and a smile." XD And I know Zacky was on fire and it was totally hot! I loved Johnny too! He was a hoot and a half! I love the story about the airplane. :)

Big meanie! I should have known you would have no comment on it.

Thanks for that! :)

WHAT!?!?! People cried rape??? That is ridiculous!

Well damn!

LOL!!!!!

Oh, that sounds absolutely awful! I'm so sorry to hear that! Although, that all does sound very epic and very rock and roll! That's pretty impressive! And I've heard of New Years Day before, yes. (:

You've got to be right! EXACTLY! And what I really don't get is when someone doesn't like a certain type of music so they act as if it's so terrible that it shouldn't exist. I mean, you're entitled to your opinion and all, but be respectful of others'. Otherwise you're tasteless, in my opinion. And I know! I saw the Q&A and was laughing my ass off half of the time! I love how passionate Zacky got, and Brian was hilarious when he mentioned his father!

So far, I think you are the only person to use the title to try and figure out what is going on in the story; I think that's very impressive and a very good idea! And you're also the first to suggest it could be about a great big misunderstanding. Interesting! Obviously I'm going to go with no comment, and refuse to say whether you're on the right track or not. (; But I will say that it does logically make sense!

And you're welcome! I figured it would surprise you to get a direct answer for once, haha, but I didn't see the point in playing vague when I'd already pretty much confirmed it. xD And I'm glad you can 'relax' a bit for a few chapters! Suspense is always good and whatnot, but I don't want you holding your breath EVERY chapter. You have to breathe sometimes! (:

Yeah, that's not cool in my book, either. I don't think I'd ever be able to write rape anyways, and especially not in a story where there would ever be any chance of the rapist being forgiven or whatever. Just... no. I can't glorify something so horrible. I can't do it. And I mean, Zacky definitely is an ass in this story, and both he and Ava have done terrible things in the past (some of which are revealed and some of which aren't), but rape is a line I would never have Zacky cross. I just can't. Which is why I was a bit disturbed by how many people shouted rape when Zacky and Ava actually mated. I mean, he was a dick about it, but it was her idea, and she didn't try and stop him.

You're definitely right. Ava is not nearly as submissive as she 'should be', as far as her family has ever been concerned. And that's not to say that pure-bloods are actually submissive, because they're arrogant assholes and very dominant in certain respects, but as a general rule, females are always submissive to their mates. It's what is expected and whatnot. Hell, it's what Ava tried to claim she was doing when she was talking to Drake, because it was what she knew Drake would want to hear.

I'm... not going to answer that. I'm sorry! But I promise that if your questions aren't answered, you can ask me again at the end of everything and I will go ahead and answer. (: That's just something that I do want you wondering about!

And holy crap, I know what you mean about the dog thing. When our girl goes into heat it is insane, and I always feel bad because we get so irritated with her but it's not like it's her fault or anything. And then it makes all of the boys insane, and I just want to slam my head into a wall because it's ridiculous. Actually, for us, the boys were more irritating, because they just wouldn't leave her alone, even when they were all in separate crates. I can't even explain how many times I heard the phrase "Get your nose out of your sister's vagina!" throughout the week I was staying with my sister and brother-in-law. Just... that's something I thought I'd never hear. xD

Yeah I was in so much pain that I ended up taking my pain meds for my kidney stone for my sunburn just so I could sleep. :( It totally sucked but was totally worth it! New Years Day (I don't know if you have heard of them) totally freaking rock and I'm sure that it is only a matter of time before they get big! I loved the chick she was so awesome! And though I'm not the biggest fan of BVB I must say they are fucking awesome live! Dude their freaking lead guitarist was sick and rather than cancel the show or try and play without him, he was backstage puking into a bucket while he played! If that isn't rock n roll I don't know what is. The best part about it was you could hear anything off about it at all, he was spot on the whole time despite being sick!

Oh my goodness, you have to be my twin! That is what I have been saying!!! Maybe not word for word but yeah all styles of music is influenced by the others. I was telling my youngest sister that he was an idiot to say that he didn't like metal or rock n roll all that much (because they sing) because they are what influenced most of those bands that are screaming (like Avenged). I told her that the oldest form of music is classical (that I can honestly think of) and so everyone should like it because it was started it all! Then as time went on someone would try and set themselves apart from all the others and that was how you got all these different genres. Hell even the guys were saying in their live Q & A yesterday (have you gotten to watch that by the way? If not you have to watch it, I laughed my ass off!!! Brian gets his humor from his father that is for sure. A total must see) that they were even influenced by some of classical composures for Hail to the King.

As always you are very welcome. :)

I know it wasn't the right time. I'm just dying to know what happened between them. From the title of the stroy, I almost want to assume that it has to be some big misunderstanding between the two. Due to both being prideful and stubborn they just never bothered to talk to each other about what happened and over the years it has only made them dislike each other more. Maybe its even a 'he thinks she is in the wrong and therefore should own up to it while she thinks that he is the one in the wrong and should own up to it' sort of thing. I don't know its just driving me crazy cause I want Zacky to be happy, or what little happiness he can gain from being mated to Ava because lets face it those two will probably never get along completely or see eye to eye on everything.

Holy crap you actually answered my question. I didn't think you would. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I can actually relax a little while I'm reading the next few chapters. Ever since you clued me into the fact that there was this thing that happened between Zacky and Ava, I've been 'walking' into the newest update holding my breath wondering if this is going to be were we find out.

Thank god because I don't think I could handle reading that. I mean I have read some stories where Zacky has been a dick, done some pretty bad things which I can handle, but I don't think I could read one were he raped someone. I just....no...that's not cool at all in my book.

True, true. I can see what you mean but Ava is not submissive at all, unlike the women mated to those that are pure-bloods (I'm assuming that they are/have to be submissive to their mate). So were I was going with that was because Ava is not the submissive type I could totally see her trying to avoid having to go through the whole 'going into heat' process.

So because Zacky and Ava aren't 'mating' before she goes into heat, does that mean that when she does it will be impossible for them to "keep their hands off each other" or what? I mean when my dog went into heat it was insane! I couldn't keep her locked up. The dumb thing (I love my baby to death but man did she piss me off) took off every chance she got. So I'm wondering if that is what it is going to be like for Zacky and Ava.

(:

That sounds like a great collection of bands! And it sounds totally worth the sunburn! I know how shitty that is. I actually managed to remember to put some on before the one and only festival I got to go to, but I usually completely forget sunscreen. Not fun, right? And I know! I don't understand people that are ever like "Oh, I only listen to X." I'm just like, really? I'll listen to everything at least a few times. I mean, I have some obvious preferences and there are genres I generally speaking do not particularly enjoy, but you can always find an artist or band that's an exception. And since every style of music is influenced by others... you can't honestly just listen to one. I don't get it. You CAN'T.

Thank you!

I think that's a good observation; you're right. I'll even directly say that -- holy crap! I was direct about something! -- because I've pretty much already confirmed that by telling you there will be something revealed that is going to piss off some Ava Cheerleaders. The guys are just used to Ava and Zacky hating each other, so they really don't suspect that anything specific happened, but you're right, for someone who didn't grow up with the two of them constantly fighting, it sure as hell seems obvious that something else did happen to escalate their hatred. I know you wanted Zacky to step in and tell Matt, but the time just wasn't right. When will we find out? Pretty soon, I think. The way I'm looking at the next few chapters, it's looking like it'll probably be coming up soon, unless I suddenly get an inspiration for something out of the blue to include, or I suddenly realize I need to re-order some events. But at the moment, it's looking like the big reveal could potentially happen around Chapter Thirty-Two? It has to be at least three chapters out, but, again, it might get pushed back just a little bit if something else pops into my mind, or if during writing the two that definitely go before it, I realize there needs to be a better transition. We'll see. Fingers crossed for early thirties, though!

Yeah, you don't see it, because that'd never happen. Sure as hell not in this story -- that's just ridiculously out of character. Like I said, that just popped up because the train of thought lead right to it. xD

Most probably do like their mates, but not all do. Particularly in pureblood families, it's much less about actually liking each other and much more about appearances. But even in those situations, the females wouldn't ever try to avoid going into heat because it's a 'duty' and whatnot. And, like Matt suggested, as long as the pair is mating and whatnot, it's actually not anything hugely inconveniencing or terrible or anything. Even those that don't like each other don't have to have any issues with it. /shrug.

Not that confusing.

LOL! :)

Yeah Warped was pretty awesome, I got to see some of the bands I like (New Years Day, Black Veil Brides, Juliet Simms, Silverstein, and Tonight Alive) but I got really really sunburnt. THANK YOU!!! Even the guys don't just listen to metal! The greatest musicians listen to a wide variety of music.

I think that you do a great job and like I've said before, most of the time I don't like Matt because of the way writers write him, but you do a great job! :)

But the amount of hate they have for each has to steam from something that happened between the two of them. I can get that they may not have liked each other when they were younger (or first met) but somthing had to have happened to have escalated their dislike of each other. That is what I was hoping Zacky would end up confessing to Matt. When are we going to find out what Ava did to Zacky to make him hate her so much? We know what Zacky did to Ava (unless there is more).

XP

I just don't see Zacky forcing himself on her to get her pregnant. I don't like that thought either.

Well I know you would refuse or deny it! Well yeah because I'm sure that most of the female werewolves actually like their mates and wouldn't mind going into heat.

Well I'm glad I could make it so interesting! Especially considering it's also so extremely confusing. xD

Me too! I volunteered for like five useless errand runs in the past two days.

I totally understand; it makes complete sense, and I agree. (:

Makes sense, makes sense. And oh my goodness, I'm jealous of you again! I wanted to go to Warped so bad! But no one would go with me and it was far away anyways. And that is ridiculous! He definitely doesn't know the meaning of good music! Every person who's legitimately into music knows you can't just listen to only one genre.

True! I will definitely have to use that trump card!! :D

I'm glad you like my Matt! I try pretty hard with him.

I get where you're coming from with that, but yeah, it's just something that's between Zacky and Ava. As far as everyone else is concerned, they just never got along, and never will. And, to be fair, whatever happened between Zacky and Ava didn't necessarily have to have happened when they first met; it very well could have just been that they didn't get along when they were younger.

And I know! I'm sorry (kinda)! :P

True, true, though the restlessness/sleeplessness is much less intense in the females. But you're totally right.

I know you didn't think that! It just kind of came up in the train of thought so I went with it. And was very disturbed by the thought of him 'forcible impregnating her'. Just... o.O But my mind works in weird ways like that. But yeah, like I said, if the motivation was to avoid pups, all they'd really need to do is use a condom. It's the heat itself that might be more of a motivation to avoid.

So yes; it definitely could be a witch she is dealing with. Dealing with a witch would definitely be something to keep from the pack, so it's definitely a possibility. So I suppose she could be trying to do that, yes. But... I refuse to confirm or deny that! (; Though, if she did prevent herself from going into heat, she'd be the first in history to ever successfully do that.