I can’t promise that this will be quality. I’m not doing well tonight, so I want to write it out rather than wallow.My grandmother passed away three months ago. We were incredibly close. She had a massive hand in raising me. We (the grandchildren) would have sleep overs at her house on the weekends “Just because”, “Just to visit”: without warrant. She would spoil us silly, like...

I abhor children. Passionately. Innately. To a point which I think thoughts that I probably shouldn't ever think about anyone when they start to cry/whine. But, with this being said so bluntly, I think I would adore to work in a pediatric ward in a hospital. There are so many little minds to influence in a pediatrics ward like that and so many young little lives that truly need you to help them...

Recently my fiance and I have done some math involving budgeting. We've known for a long while that if ever there were an emergency that we could live off of solely his salary, sans my car insurance (I have a contingency fund for it), comfortably until I could find further employment. As a student it's something we made sure of, should I ever have to quit my job for my classes.Well, we decided to...

Today was my first day of my sociology course and while it isn't anything I've not gone through before (I'm only taking it because Hiram is paranoid that the combined courses of Cultural Mysteries and Social Psychology didn't expose me to ENOUGH sociology: ergo, it did) something the professor said still resonated with me. She went over how sociology is just scientific people watching and went on...

I'm slowly, or not so slowly, discovering how sexist the maintenance crew at my apartment complex is. For a week now I haven't had hot water. I've called about it EVERY single day. Three times I got told, "Well the pilot light is lit so you're just using too much hot water", one time they replaced the temperature control dial on the tank, and today they didn't even bother showing up. No one has...

I have the weirdest dreams when I'm stressed out. They're not the usual vivid stress dream of teeth falling (though those are plentiful as well) but rather vividly spiritual and almost...guiding. Its been like this ever since I was young and my parents were going through a divorce: frequently I'd dream of ghosts and the beach, and there was always a man named Michael taking me through them. I've...

I've decided to start working out again, even though it's just at home/in my living room, to help with mostly with stress, but also to drop the 20 pounds I've gained since transferring away from my free gym membership at CSU. I've not changed my college life-style eating habits (eating badly and eating a lot) since I've left and now especially after the holidays it's begun to catch up with me.As a...

Just my year in review.What is the single best thing that happened in the past year?I got engaged to the man of my dreams.What is the most challenging thing that happened to you in 2015?Accepting the fact that after 3 years of college I still have 4 left, due to a major change.What thing did you learn the most from this year?Patience is a virtue, do your best to develop it.What is the kindest...

Megalomanianoun\ meg·a·lo·ma·nia \ˌme-gə-lō-ˈmā-nē-ə, -nyə\a condition or mental illness that causes people to think that they have great or unlimited power or importance.I often feel as though I'm but an actor on a stage. It doesn't matter the situation. I could be at work, in class, or out with friends. But no matter the situation most of my life feel scripted to gain what it is I...

A few weeks ago my Aunt and Uncle got divorced. My Uncle is the half that is actually related to us: a somewhat drunken, bit of a jackass, big guy who loves his kids and family. Well, today, my (Ex) Aunt who is still friends with a lot of the family on Facebook (we're just a slow-to-move type of family on the social networking side: I don't think my father has been on in months, in fact) posted an...

I should be asleep, but I'm not so here we are.There's this odd comfort that comes with the idea of the space between the moon and the Earth. Something relaxing that reminds me just how small I am and how insignificant my life really is in the long run. I think that this makes a lot of people scared, that it makes them worried that they'll never be remembered with the passing of time. But I think...

Why the hell we cant just love everybody as humans I'll never understand. Anyone and everyone tries to pull the race card one way or the other and it's something that we as a species really need to move past. What if some of us had horns or wings? Then what? Or even something as simple as more than two arms? Constantly quarreling over something as petulant as whose skin makes more melanin due to...

The status was: "You're all 15 so please wear shirts in the pictures you post online."And I had three young girls all confront me, like a flock of pigeons, accusing that status to be personally about them.Now look, if the shoe fits wear it BUT the point of this isn't them.It's about the lack of clothing that young girls are not only wearing out, but flaunting online. It's theoretically "Against...

I used to think that happiness was a rainy day in Cleveland with a hot mug of coffee. Or a hot, skin-burning day spent in the salty ocean with all of it's treasures. But now, after three years, I finally know happiness again.and this isn't to say that my fiance doesn't make me happy, because he does, this is about inner peace.But the day I secured my car I felt a giant weight lift off of my...

If I had one true dream job, that special coveted shiny little job that everyone places on a pedestal and only the truly devout pursue it would have to be the title of Secret Agent/Spy.My question, of course, is that short of joining the army and working your way up through the ranks over several hardcore and distraught years, how does one become a a true secret agent? The average FBI agent is a...

On one hand I'm this flowing, flexible creative creature. I thrive in music and English, language, stories, spells, meditation. Vibration. Fluidity. And the on the other hand I'm this tight ass, rigid, stick in the mud who stresses over everything.What do I really want out of this life?other than peace and the collected human race coming together as one body of love.Relaxation, happiness. To work...

Summer. Is. Here....finally.And that means I have time to read and write and to drink tea lazily on the days I'm off work. Which are few but are so damn productive. I've even entered a contest. A contest! Something I couldn't even dream about doing but three weeks ago. It's a lovely feeling and I'm so happy to be back on the swing of things. Now I just need some good stationary and pens, or...

I was the ripe, young age of 15 when I finally started to feel comfortable with myself. I was in a new school, I had new friends, I had a boyfriend who turned into a 3 year+ high school sweetheart, I had a sanctuary in my bedroom, my GPA was a consistent 3.5+. I stopped reading so much, which looking back on it a small bit of regret hits me for putting my time on things other than the English...