I've lost count of how many hours have gone by where I haven't properly slept. It is rare that I really actually sleep. I'm tired and I'm resting on a bed but I'm never fully unconscious. Fifteen minutes go by and I'm awake again. Constantly, there is evidence that I'm sad or afraid even if I can't always identify where those feelings are coming from.My dad and I talked today for awhile. He is the...

Plastic surgery, oh, I'm sure everyone's got an opinon. I used to have a pretty firm thought about the subject, to be honest. I thought the idea of cosmetic surgery was ridiculous. As somebody who loves fitness, I always thought there is nothing a little diet and exercise can't help. It's all about a lifestyle change.However, recently, a friend of mine got a boob job because she was alwas very...

Anyone who has read a journal of mine knows that I love fitness. I consider myself an athlete and it's just something I'm passionate about.Right now, my life is at it's peak of chaos. I've never been this busy before, and it's kind of exhilrating, but it also transform my usual daily workouts.So today, I just got home and it's nearly ten to one am. I would like to put in a run before bed, but I...

Rarely do I jump straight to the chase, but I'll spare you my usual ramblings this evening.Very recently, my mom was diagnosed with AML which is a form of blood cancer. I am not wishing for sympathy comments here or sob stories. My family has really stepped up and been incrediable.Also, though cancer is very serious, it's not like in the movies, it's also highly treatable. However, watching my mom...

I move in exactly six weeks. Suddenly, it feels like a lifetime.Lately, as i've been packing my things and preparing to venture away, i've been pondering: "Do we create our own circumstances or are they bestowed upon us?"In the last year alone, my life has changed more constantly than before. Some for the better, but on a hole, it's been pretty hectic and testing. However, by not leaving sooner or...

At work today, one of my many jobs, I was working at the coffee franchise I work at. I really love it there, it's not like the club or the gym, but the people are fabulous and I fit in pretty well, at least, they make me feel that way. It could all be BS.Anyway, this one guy comes in all the time and i've taken to calling him "Chai" because I don't know his actual name. He's a customer, I'm a...

It's been a while, good Mibbians.Believe you me, I have missed you.Due to moving in a few months, i've taken on a third job (which has been fantastic, the people are stellar) to help save up as much money as possible before taking off in June. However, I really want to keep working on my stories that I haven't updated in a month or surplus.So, when you get off track on a story, what helps focus...

1) Sleeping in when the day permits, sometimes all the way to three in the afternoon.2) Wishing that Steven Harper would appoint a Secretary of "You Don't Look Fat In That".3) Eating more than ten chips, even though that's the serving size.4) Saying that those cupcakes were home made. I opened the box, I mixed, I cared. I could've baked nothing at all.5) Having explicitly dirty thoughts about Mark...

You hear people talk about how a song changed their lives. While, I do like music, listening to it, dancing along, even creating it, all around I can agree music is great, but I've never actually had that moment where I could say "That song saved me."Maybe, it's because I look at the big picture and I always find a way to make the song just a cociendence. Also, i've never actually wanted to kill...

Writing that title sort of made me feel like Usher, but this isn't about any momma drama, I promise.I called a friend I hadn't spoken to in awhile because I told her I was moving early. I was talking to her about something and she kept comparing it to her life, and though, yes, it is nice to know that someone can relate or feels what you're saying, I really wanted to scream: "Please, shut up,...

For the most part, it's a general rule for me to stay off the topic of religion. I think it sparks a lot of conflict that could easily be avoided, but I thought I'd just mention a little conversation that happened between a few friends on Friday.We had a secret Santa exchange before getting ready to open the club, and we were all pretty talkative and giggly from that (I got a Clinque gift card and...

Mr, F., where were you back in the day (AKA two weeks ago) when I was looking for a second job? You would’ve saved me from a few strange run-in’s with my father and his family.Anyway, I was at the gym today and I decided to be a complete tool and not do what my darling physio suggested and of course, I’ve messed my feet up even more. Either way, it was a good work out. I’m so bummed out...

At work, we were all talking about the upcoming theme nights and that sparked a conversation about all our theme songs and what makes a theme song. The bosses made us all vote on songs for everyone, anonmously, and they made two CDs to put in the stockings for us.What is your theme song?Here's some of ours:Green Light by John Legend Ft. Andre 3000. It's always the last song we play before opening...

I know, the last few entires have been about my weird run-in's with my dad, but this one doesn't have to much to do with that. Anyway, I told Demi at work today about how working near my dad's house is proving to be an awkward issue because I keep seeing him, his wife, and daughter (she even came into the store yesterday). He and I talked and he asked me how much I knew about my dad, and to be...

Picked up my sister from University today. Perhaps, I made a point to tell her that I would wait for her in the parking lot where I know Paul's space is. I didn't know that he was off at the same time as she was, however, so I'm not completely crazy.He looked great. He was wearing a shirt underneath his coat that I picked out for him over a year ago when we were just seeing each other. His hair...

I love Saturday nights. I get off around three am and a bunch of us drive out to Perkin's and all order enough food to feed a village and just pick off of every plate. It's become something I look foreword to and always enjoy. Anyway, the group ranges from three to eighteen of us, whoever wants to come is welcome!So, there was only around ten of us and one of the guys, Demi, brought up that he's...

I lost my cool tonight. I don't exactly know where I was storing it, but I definalty misplaced it momentarily this evening. Well, technically last night, considering it's almost five in the morning here, but I'm up to go for a run.So, here's the deal: Saturday night, fabulous night at work, all my favorite people are working, it's busy, money is being paid, drinks are being poured, and there was a...

My answering machine was being hounded by messages that went something long the lines of "Michelle, this is Dr. So & Whoever, you haven't been here forever. You might be dying, so come."Well, no it didn't exactly go like that, but more or less.So, I go and the first question she asked (the same one she's been asking since I was like tweleve) "Is there a possibility that you could be pregnant?"...

We met when we were in junior high and I was the heaviest I'd ever been, gaining all the weight I'd shed off over the course of the summer. We were friends because we were neighbors and would walk home together at lunch and after school, talking about trucks, Van Halen, and our crazy English teacher. I remember when you told me I was fat, but that it didn't matter because we weren't more than...

I wish I knew, but this journal won't focus on the apocalypse, genocide, global warming, or anything along those lines. No way, I'm going to give the spotlight to something far more important.Alright, it's been well-established that I work in a night club and honestly, it's only been recently that I have complained about that. I love the people I work with, I like being at a place where I can...