The Fire in Your Eyes - Comments

I like how the narrator is staring into her(?) own eyes, and she's(?) able to discern the dull colour - something on the verge of losing life, something that has possibly lost the prominent colour it once had. I also like how she(?) recognizes that there is a fire there though, like a last trace of hope. So, while the eyes are grey, there's still that shimmer of light within them.
Then I really like how you contrast that beginning stanza with the narrator looking into his eyes - it kind of feels like maybe her(?) eyes were once blue, because I feel like grey would come from blue eyes. Anywho, I like how she can see through the shimmering of the eyes, that they're misleading - or that she knows him so well that they really are the wondows to his soul.
I also think it's interesting that blue can be associated with sorrow - and in this case, it kind of alludes to that, but it's still shimmering. Does that make sense? It's like a paradox, but a really lovely one. :)
Then I like how you go between the two eyes again, the narrator knowing for sure that her(?) spark is going and that his spark is fading too. I like how through these paragraphs that the important thing is the spark going.
But I like how the end doesn't necessarily mean that it's all over - that at least she's(?) still trying to find something there. :)

It's a really lovely poem, and I love that the repetition works well in it. :)
I like how the colours tell the story, and that the lack of colour helps too. It's a lovely piece.

I suck at writing comments..sorry :P
but this is yet another great poem. :)

Okay that comment got a little bit muddled up!! Lolz just ignore my blonde moment where i tryed typing something but it refused to show or somin like that....
You probz don't even understand what i'm saying! Never mind! Love you xox

I luvvvv this one! Keep it up!!! And you poems on to Ailith!!! They're just as AMAZING! Love you loads and cya at school xoxox

I Am Ailith-
I love this poem for many reasons.
It's almost like a dialogue going back and forth to get the whole action of what has happened, but by appearance.
You describe well with the appearance.
A whole lot of writers here on mibba don't exactly get the jist of appearance and description whereas they just plain out say the feeling.
But here you see the feeling.
I have no idea if you get where I'm going but, you're a good writer.

-Sarahanne.