I like this poem, you express some pretty strong feelings in a creative and effective way. I especially liked the second verse where you write "I gave and I was hurt. I bleed..." In my opinion though it might be an idea to 'clean up the poem' a little bit with typing 'I' instead of 'i' and I think you missed a space between "I gave and I was hurt." It helps the reader to focus more on the poem, but then again that's my opinion and definitely a very little thing. (:
January 16th, 2011 at 01:42pm