October 28th, 2013 at 11:02am
I'm here to judge your entry for the contest.
First off, this entry is spooky, just like the picture and I think you caught the essence of the picture's meaning perfectly. I love how descriptive you of the character climbing out of the ground. Like I said before it's spooky and very brilliant. I'm left wondering how did he get buried in the ground in the first place and was he brought back to life? Or was he buried alive?
This piece was very descriptive and I liked it. This was a great piece to get anyone motivated for Halloween.
Thanks for entering the contest; you did a great job.
Firstly, can I just say that I love the repetition of further, further? It just draws everything back to the action of the man in the poem and it just adds this really eerie air to the whole thing. It also rounds all of the stanzas off really well, it links them all together and makes the whole thing flow effortlessly, so that's definitely the one part of this poem that stuck out the most to me as I was reading. I also like the air of mystery that you've added into this. Like Hina said, the reader doesn't really get told whether the man is undead or whether someone has buried him alive and it allows you to form your own conclusions whilst you read, but still gives you this wonderful little story behind it. And the ending does seem marginally happy, which I wasn't expecting from a poem entered in the contest so really well done on being different there! It also ties into the title a little because it sucks that the poor guy ended up in the ground at first, but he's gotten out so it is a little bittersweet because it isn't one of those things that you'd want to happen, but you're happy for him as you finish.
Honestly, I have no complaints. Beautifully descriptive and a really nice take on the photograph you chose. Good job!