From Me - Comments

@ Tipsy Returns

:O You're just too good at poetry! Idk, I really love this poem! It's so true! And tthe way you mould it is awesome! OMg, Tipsy's in love Haha Really, this was amazing. Totally love it <3

Firstly, I don't do layout reviews in general, but this one SERIOUSLY hurt my eyes. I had to highlight the whole page to read it. I know aesthetically its very appealing to have such a pretty color text on black background, but it can be hard to read and/or head-ache inducing for some people (like me). A duller pink would work better.

Though I generally don't focus on grammar in poems, I do have a couple things I'd like to point out. In "Before this poems over," it should really be "Before this poem IS over," but if you absolutely want to keep the contraction, you should add an apostrophe to "poem's" to indicate that it is an contraction and not the plural form of the word. There is also a problem in the line "Noone's perfect in this world." "No one" is two words therefore "no one's" is as well.

Onto the poem itself: I did like it, but I would still say work on it more. It IS inspiring and it's lovely to see such strong emotion about sticking up for oneself. However, the message itself doesn't flow in a poetic sense. You do have good rhymes and a consistent structure, but there is more to making a poem flow than that. Some poems take a lot of time and work to get the right flow and that's okay. I personally have partially rewritten and rearranged every poem I've written and continue to do so. I would take a hard look at this to do some touch up work on it. For me, singing my poem out loud helps me see where things aren't flowing well together, whereas for other people, just reciting it out loud helps.

Keep it up though!

@ greenday.angel
Thanks :)

This is really inspiring, and I think more people should read this. Nice job!