While I enjoyed the overall message of this poem, what I found myself drawn to the most was your surreal connection between alchemy and the immersion of one human into another, and the resulting change of one or both entities. I also really appreciated how you articulated this state of utter attunement and absorption with another person, how you can lose your grip on your sense of self when basking in the radiance of another's: like the brightest lightbulb dimmed by the opulence of the sun.
In my opinion, the jewel of this piece is your final stanza: how the ocean sounds when it crashes in to rocks. How I hear the fever-waves over and over as they walk out of the room. And I become the ocean spilling in to the center of their couch. Fucking alchemists.
While I enjoyed the overall message of this poem, what I found myself drawn to the most was your surreal connection between alchemy and the immersion of one human into another, and the resulting change of one or both entities. I also really appreciated how you articulated this state of utter attunement and absorption with another person, how you can lose your grip on your sense of self when basking in the radiance of another's: like the brightest lightbulb dimmed by the opulence of the sun.
In my opinion, the jewel of this piece is your final stanza:
how the ocean sounds when it crashes in to
rocks.
How I hear the fever-waves over and over as they walk out of
the room.
And I become the ocean spilling in to the center of
their couch.
Fucking alchemists.