Did You Ever - Comments

  • Michael Westen

    Michael Westen (450)

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    This is so good. The story that is being told is so dark, but the light you shine on it with this story is incredible. I like the fact that it's from this character's mind, it's what I imagine people who find out their loved one is a murderer feel. Incredible job.
    May 12th, 2016 at 09:34pm
  • saeglopur

    saeglopur (350)

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    I'm not good at analyzing poetry, so I can't give you a really intellectual response to it. I've only read a little poetry here and there, and I haven't read many that handle repetition the way you have. I imagine it can be done in a less than purposeful way but I don't see that here. I think the first line of each stanza really helps keep me grounded and in touch with what's happening, which poetry doesn't always do. I appreciate the importance of body here, you see it a lot in the mention of skin, blood, eyes and heart. Although it's short it packs a strong punch and is very emotive. And I don't know if this was intentional but I like how this layout is pretty neutral colored and how the last line of the first stanza is "as the color drained from her skin". I think the layout portrays that and its a good juxtaposition.
    December 24th, 2015 at 01:38am