I Hate You For Loving Me
I honestly thought you were better than this.
I gave you my heart and you gave me a kiss.
You held it for almost eternity,
Than you smashed on the brink of maturity.
I trembled, though you couldn’t see,
Because you aren’t man enough to watch as I bleed.
I love you, and that’s all I can say,
Yet you seem like this is nothing, and that you’re perfectly okay.
My heart no longer beats for anything but you,
But now it is lying on the floor bleeding and utterly confused.
I thought you cared about me? I thought you loved me?
I don’t think you realize what you’ve just done.
I’m supposed to force a smile and face everyone?
I have to enter a room and realize I’m all alone,
And that somewhere out there you’re doing well, though feeling like stone.
How do I look our friends in the face, Anthony?
How am I supposed to tell them I wasn’t good enough for you to wait?
I don’t hate you, I want you to know this,
Because if I said it this wouldn’t ache like it is.
I’m crying even as I write how I feel,
Because usually my poems were about eternity, not forgetting how to feel.
And this is so cliché, and maybe weak,
But when you leave, will you have the courage to say you don’t love me?
You once saved me from myself,
And now you’re shoving me away from what we once felt.
You once said you’d give up your own happiness to give me a lot;
Was it then that I wasn’t what made you think content thoughts?
You’re a fucking liar, and that’s all I have to say.
You lied when you said you loved me everyone of those 365 days.
You’re choosing to throw everything we built and worked hard one away,
And why? Because I live further than you want to drive one day?
I gave you everything I had, and you dropped it without a care;
You broke everything from my heart, to my soul, to the hope I once bared.
I’m getting too old for immaturity, Anthony,
And my lack of sleep has forced me to see,
That one day you’ll feel the pain I am going through as we speak.
I never in my life thought you would go away,
But apparently I’m a little too late.
Maybe you’ll move on from this, & fine someone else,
But I guarantee I’m still going to be left in this hell.
Fuck you, Anthony, and every last time you said you loved me.
Fuck you for taking away my last strand of being happy.
I gave you my heart and you gave me a kiss.
You held it for almost eternity,
Than you smashed on the brink of maturity.
I trembled, though you couldn’t see,
Because you aren’t man enough to watch as I bleed.
I love you, and that’s all I can say,
Yet you seem like this is nothing, and that you’re perfectly okay.
My heart no longer beats for anything but you,
But now it is lying on the floor bleeding and utterly confused.
I thought you cared about me? I thought you loved me?
I don’t think you realize what you’ve just done.
I’m supposed to force a smile and face everyone?
I have to enter a room and realize I’m all alone,
And that somewhere out there you’re doing well, though feeling like stone.
How do I look our friends in the face, Anthony?
How am I supposed to tell them I wasn’t good enough for you to wait?
I don’t hate you, I want you to know this,
Because if I said it this wouldn’t ache like it is.
I’m crying even as I write how I feel,
Because usually my poems were about eternity, not forgetting how to feel.
And this is so cliché, and maybe weak,
But when you leave, will you have the courage to say you don’t love me?
You once saved me from myself,
And now you’re shoving me away from what we once felt.
You once said you’d give up your own happiness to give me a lot;
Was it then that I wasn’t what made you think content thoughts?
You’re a fucking liar, and that’s all I have to say.
You lied when you said you loved me everyone of those 365 days.
You’re choosing to throw everything we built and worked hard one away,
And why? Because I live further than you want to drive one day?
I gave you everything I had, and you dropped it without a care;
You broke everything from my heart, to my soul, to the hope I once bared.
I’m getting too old for immaturity, Anthony,
And my lack of sleep has forced me to see,
That one day you’ll feel the pain I am going through as we speak.
I never in my life thought you would go away,
But apparently I’m a little too late.
Maybe you’ll move on from this, & fine someone else,
But I guarantee I’m still going to be left in this hell.
Fuck you, Anthony, and every last time you said you loved me.
Fuck you for taking away my last strand of being happy.