Nervousness consumes me

Nervousness consumes me.
It has a hold.
It strangles my veins and my nerves
and alters my reactions.
It pauses my face, and your image
and stills my happiness.
Freezes it in time.
It cannot expand.
And instead declines.

I do not say what I need to,
I do not smile like I want to,
and the next thing I know,
I'm angry.
I hate myself.
Another moment missed.
Another opportunity come and gone.

My nervousness consumes me,
and if I don't fight back,
it will be all I am.