I Have Been Cruel

In my own ways I have been cruel
In my own ways I have hurt people
Yet, I have not noticed a thing

I have been cruel without thought
I have been cruel without effort
These people have hated me
These people left me
And I never knew the reason why

I have been cruel for not knowing even why
I have despised myself

What had I done wrong?
Why do they leave me?
Only to drown in my own shame
Only to curse myself for reasons I do not know

I had been cruel...

I have been cruel...

Will I always be left on my knees watching their back as they leave?...