cutting

I walk into the kitchen.

I search for the biggest knife I can find.

I find one.

I take it in my hand.

I cut my wrist not once,

not twice,

but three times.

Blood gushing out.

I do the same to my other wrist.

I start to feel dizzy.

I faint.

I wake up in a strange white room.

I hear a beeping noise.

I wonder if this is heaven.

Then,

I realize that I'm in the hospital.

Because I cut myself.