Bulletproof

I'm done watching everything crumble.
I want my flower to sprout from the ground,
And engulf you in color.

Done waiting for you to notice,
Bored enough to tell you
How much I really don't care.

No better off than I was before,
Worse than you think,
Sadder than what matters.

You do things for joy,
I do them to give up.
The finish line is no longer far off.

I swerve to the right and
Smash
Into the concrete walls of anger.

Each street sign tells me to stay centered,
I ignore them
And fumble sideways.

You didn't matter,
You were the bloody red
Stain on my lips.

You tasted bitter,
But I kept licking you anyway.
I regret feeling your mouth slip false kisses.

Every sad thing
Reminds me of
You.

I've given up hope,
Given up love,
Given up God.

You made me worthless,
Stripped me of my white gold,
And sold it to a pawn shop.

Underneath it
I am only
Bronze.