A heart withe a mind of its own

A heart with love on its mind all day long, ever longing to feel it backs.

The owner of this heart is no other than me.

Its feelings are out of control and are driving me insane.

It points one way for a day and another next.

It never makes up its mind.

The item I hold so dear to me is the thing that is killing me; slowly, yet, so very painfully.

I am trying to find what it is looking for but it is so hard because the things it points at are different but the same in only one way.

There are all types and shapes of this simply 4-lettered word: LOVE.

A word used a lot to express feelings or emotions.

Sometimes with or without a meaning to get what you want from someone.

To me, it has a meaning but towards me it is meaningless.

It is suppose to be a shell of benefits and comfort to all, yet it is the shell that is hiding me from others, while it tries to suffocate me.

So that others will not know that I exist or so I can be easily forgotten.