Square One.

It took me getting so close...
So close to death.
It made me realize,
that my death wouldn't solve a thing.

I have a whole new outlook on life.
Sure --
My mom doesn't love me,
He's booted me from his life,
My friends are dropping like flies.

But I realized....
They're not the only people in the world.
I'll always have that ache, but in time...
it will start to mend.
I know it will never go away completely,
along with the memories of how things used to be,
but...
I think I can live with that.
Eventually,
my mom will get old and die,
I'll find love again,
and I can make new friends...

I've just got to learn from my mistakes,
and keep moving forward.
Because the second I relapse,
the second I have a single doubt...
Everything I've worked so hard for,
will be for nothing.
I'll be back to square one.

But as for right now...
nothing can hurt me.
I've felt the worst of it.
I've dealt with the blows,
the screams...
And yet,
here I stand.