Fire

I should have known that the light in your eyes
was just the reflection of the flame
flickering in the wind
it disappears, as soon as my cigarette lights
and I close the lighter

I should have known that the shortness of breath
wasn’t because of you
it’s just the smoke
calming my nerves
again I inhale

I should have know that the internal bleeding
didn’t exist until I met you
I try to cover the scars I try to burn the tears
there’s only one more place to hide
within I consume my own being

I should have known
that desiring death and praying for accidents
not wanting to bloody my own hands
to drown in ones guilt and pleasure death
nothing more than a form of suicide

It’s closing in
the fires growing
trapped against the wall
grasping for air through a sky of black smoke
is this what you wanted, is this what you killed for

I reach out although I have no pity
I assist although I do not care
I cry although I have no emotion
I bleed although I have no heart
I love yet I am dead