Weeks of Black.

I look towards the clouds
the sun calling my name
bags full of God at my heels
bags full of mistakes and hurts and sorrow
this little teacup at my hand twitches and falls
the brew of dreams falling to the Earth's ground.

Hell's fire raises up in tides
the heat coming alive
dear Lord, can you help me?
from this horrible thing I call life
my Father
take me in your heart and save me from the burn and frowns of this world.

I hear birds singing when I close my eyes
little tulips blooming at my side
my lids open up
and all I see is horror
I feel like I've let Mother Earth down
when I see my basket of lilies getting crushed.

I dream of thunder in the daylight
oh, those lights are beautiful!
I dream of the stars bursting on the ground
lighting the dull dirt brown earth
music coming from the statues mouth
the water coming down from the witches hands
I wake when the fire lights up and spreads from the bottom of her.

I fall forth
no bags of color catching me
how terrible the feeling of falling in black
with no one there to catch you.

My heart bursts through my chest when my alarm clock rings me awake
how I would like to fall asleep again.

My head
full of mirrors and confusion
sometimes I truly wonder
if my world is being taken over
by the one many people are terrified of
sometimes I look around
and feel as if I'm the only one who thinks this.

Dear God
when are you gonna come and take me from here
I really do wish you would just let me sleep again.