A Broken Promise

I promised to stop,
because I love you,
but you have no idea of how
it feels.

Literally scarred by
memories.

I pick up the razor and cut.
I see the blood mixed with my tears
I pick up the razor and cut some more.
I hate being the outsider,
being called a freak, and emo.

My family hates me, I'm pretty sure of it.
I can't be myself, I can't do what I want.
To be accepted I have to be "prep"
If I dress prep, the cutting will be worse,
because I won't be myself.

When I'm 18
my life will be turned, for the worst.
I'm a good kid, or so I'm
told, but I won't be accepted by those
who are supposed to love me the most.
A regret, I wish I was never born
and yet I know there must be a reason
to why I am on this earth.

Was I meant to fall in love,
save someone,
save myself?

I don't think I'll ever know.
All I do know is that I broke my promise to
my best friend that I love.

He is one of the only guys that I will
love unconditionally
because he knows every dirty little
secret I have and he is still by
my side.

I know in my hear that if
it wasn't for him, I'd be dead.
So go ahead and call me what you want
it doesn't matter, I broke a promise
that I should have kept.