Dear Dead-Beat Dad

I wish you could see me now.
I know you try, but I don’t seem to care.
I wish I could love you, dad.
But I don’t know if I can.
You’re just so distant, just a memory.
But I still know you,
Know your voice.
But I can’t hug you, it hurts.
It hurts my heart when I sit near you.
Because I know you’re not staying.
And I know you have to go away again.
To nowhere in particular.
Not to war, where I’ll pray you home safely.
Not to sea, where I’ll pray you don’t drown.
Just away, somewhere else, not so close.
This distance is what makes me happy;
Makes me more comfortable.
I don’t know why.
I couldn’t say why.
Maybe it’s because I put faith in you.
You were going to pick me up from day care.
And you never showed up.
You were going to buy me a princess vanity.
I’ve never had a real vanity in my room.
You were never of any inspiration.
And now it’s too hard.
So, dad, father, man, whatever I please;
Don’t be surprised if you rarely hear from me.
Because I don’t understand why.
Why you would do that to your only child.
Now I’m going to go.
I have no idea where.
I’ll try to make you proud.
One thing you’ve never done for me.