Scared

I'm still scared I am going to tumble
flashing my fears and cold hatred that lies in
deep of my soul.
that people usually turn away to.
or ending up eyeballing me like a tiger as there pray
only wishing for the personal parts of me
that I might now want to give.
I am worried
I will say wrong
feel a way they don't..
and in the end be in the shallow deep ocean
swimming,
praying,
wishing, someone would find me
along with the endless others in the sea.
I only seem to find darkness
only manage to dip my way into the black earth that lays upon me
so now I pray she won't run away..
like all the others..
me know for sure..she'll be different