Struggling.

I'm struggling,
To speak while keeping sanity,
It's hard to leave if your begging please,
So I'm struggling to keep breathing with you,
You love me- just kill me,
You hate me- just leave me,
Cause I need a minute,
Just a second,
To see straight,
These words,
They mean something,
To you,
You see nothing,
In them,
I breathe,
I never want to wake up,
Yet I open my eyes to see perfect silver,
Held quietly in my hand,
I'm struggling to stay alive.