Robots

I aspire to be a robot

because they achieve what i can't

they dont feel

or love

love is so tiresome

all it does is take your energy

and leave you empty and filled with fluff

not good fluff

the kind of fluff you get out of teddy bears

the kind with that disgusting texture

i want that metal outer shell

so everything will bounce off of me with nothing but a dull

klink

the dents would eventually add up

but i was never good at math

instead of doing my homework i would watch tv

and watch the boys skateboarding outside

so after i forget to count there will be a hole in my armor

a black whole that sucks the world in and blends it around inside me like a smoothie

not a good smoothie

the kind of smoothie you get out of hospital cafeterias

the kind with that disgusting texture

and after i drink that smoothie i will be alone

just as i started

and then i will sit and sing to myself

but even the blank walls can't stand my voice

so they leave

now im floating alone

in limbo

then i realize that if this is limbo i can control it in my own mind

i make thousands of cupcakes float around me

but i cant eat them

not even if i want to

but im not hungry

so i leave them alone

we should let the cupcakes be

they never did us any harm

but yet the world eats thousands everyday

but now i am the world

so i feel guilty and begin to cry

tears of orange juice burn my eyes

i wonder what you'd say if you were here with me

you'd say something like ' it's lame to cry orange juice'

and since i always cared about your opinion so much i would stop

but then the tears would build

as they did before

and i would implode

or maybe its explode

we could never agree on that

to leave nothing in the universe