Holding onto you

Heart beating wildly as I lay in my bed.
Visions of you dancing through my head.
Wanting to feel those arms hold me tight.
Wanting to know that everything is alright.
Desire to know that your touch is real.
Praying that this love is something you feel.
Wiping my tears as they fall without reason.
Staring out my window, season after season.
Holding on tightly to nothing but air.
Cursing out loud that this isn’t fair.
Screaming and crying, I want something to grasp.
Air thinning out and it’s your name I gasp.
One tender touch, that’s what I want.
Closing my eyes as your face starts to haunt.
Trapped in an hour glass as time slips by.
Wishing I could sprout wings and just fly.
Fly across the sorrow and all the pain.
Fly from the insanity into the sane.
Into your arms and your embrace.
Brushing my fingertips along your face.
But the wings I once had have been set on fire.
Fueled by the flames of passion and desire.
Gone up in smoke like my happiness and dreams.
The crackle of the flames cover my screams.
An enigma and shadow hidden behind lies.
An expert on masks, master of disguise.
Which thoughts are false and which ones are true?
But never doubting the fact that I love you.
So I’ll lay here and cry, holding onto your name.
I’ll swallow my regrets and all my blame.
I’ll pray to the skies that the years go by fast.
And pray I’ll be your future and not just your past.