The Idea of You and Me

I know you're not him
I know that I'm just afraid
I know that I am not thinking clearly
I know that you aren't too

This wasn't supposed to happen
This wasn't what I expected
You're too soon
You're too late

I try; but I'm scared
I try; but I'm damaged
I try; but I'm frightened by you
I try; but you might make me whole

You're on my mind all the time
You're name is writing itself onto my heart
You're presence is a distraction to me
You're slowly hypnotizing me

I don't know how I feel about this
I've never much cared for being bewitched
I was once before; and I swore never again
But here you are, coming around the bend

I saw you before
My eyes opened wide
My heart clouded over
You had to hide

Now my heart sees you clearly
My eyes do too
And now I don't quite know what to do with you

I dislike being captured
I hate being caught
Both of which make me quite distraught

These sins you've committed
Knowingly or no
Have forced me to see
The idea of you and me