so pure,so untouchable, so fake, so devine.

I can't Explain this hurt,
Its a feeling like non other.
I tryed to stay Alert,
But failed and thought why bother.
Why couldn't I get to it,
But everyone else could?
Why is one simple hit,
from you hurt more than it should?
People choose not to feel,
They tell themselves its not worth the pain.
I chose to seperate myself from what is real,
but what would i really gain?
I would gain all that is fake,
Why would I want that for?
To make sure my feelings wern't at stake,
like an innocent walk accross a sea shore.
I wish for a fairy tail end,
A castle, and freshly mowed lawns.
You were barly my bestfriend,
&& I live as what chess players call pawns.
Today I block this heart,
I chose to feel nothing, I chose to be numb.
From people, I push away, i stay apart.
I do nothing all day, but think to myself and do the ocasional hum.
I thank you for destroying me,
for making me crash and burn.
because for that Iv changed you see,
I'v become hard core, I tell myself no one can break me. This is all I have to learn.
I fear for my future,
but shh, thats not to be shared.
To tell of my weekness, is sure to send torture.
I know ill be okay,
matter of fact i know ill be fine.
Ill live my life, go on with my day.
so pure,so untouchable, so fake, so devine.

And i found a different version, shorter but i think i like it better,

I can't Explain this hurt,
Its a feeling like non other.
I tryed to stay Alert,
But failed and thought why bother.
I could touch the skin, and not the heart.
but it was him, who tore it apart.
Why couldn't I get to it, But everyone else could?
Why is one simple hit from you hurt more then it should?
People choose not to feel,
They tell themselves its not worth the pain.
I chose to seperate myself from what is real,
but what would i really gain?