I've got so far to go

After all this hoping
of you sticking right beside me,
that you’d lift me up
so the world could see
that I could be amazing,
that I could be a star.
Being proud of what you’re achieving,
being proud of who you are.
But after all this hoping
I’m not proud of what I’ve found,
then you’d whisper in my ear:
‘do not make a sound.’

I’m scared if what you’d do to me
if you found out what I know,
I just want to be your number one,
but I’ve got so far to go.
I think about you every night
as I’m laying in my bed,
thinking of all the things you do
and of all the things you said.
You make me wish I was someone else,
just so that I could please you.
I’m not gonna fake my feelings now,
I just want this to be true.