The Best But You Never Saw

I said I would stop
But I lied
I can't stop
Something I love so much
It's not easy to just stop
So I'm
Lighting up, opening a drink, splitting my flesh
I'm writing this for you
I've lied so now I pay the price
I'm sorry you may forgive me
But I will never forgive myself
For the lies I've told
Your my best friend
& I hide things from you
For that I'm sorry
You were the best
But you never saw me dying.