The right way to heal a broken heart with chocolate

Now children watch closely so you don't mess a single step:
Step one: Catch the lying dirt bag who hurt you. Step two: Torture him till he admits to being wrong (depending on the love y'all shared don't fall for any sweet talk or I'm sorry please lets try agains DIRT BAGS DONT GET 2ND CHANCES) Step three: Make him scream!(in pain or pleasure it doesnt matter your choice but make it quick) Step four: Get a sharp knife and pick something on his body to cut off or out. Step five: Get Chocolate,or Carmel, or What ever floats your boat. Step Six: Chill,freeze or cook it. Step Seven Last step I cant believe you made it this far:FEED IT TO HIM!!!! Okay?

This is one of the best recipes I have please contact me if you need some help with the steps (recipe shouldn't take more than an hour unless your good!)