Secrets

I watch the screen
my heart beats faster.
I bite my lip,
hesitating on my future.

I click on the cut
anticipation filling me up,
adrenaline replacing my blood.
And I can't scroll down fast enough.

I sigh at the words strung together,
I giggle as I click on reply.
My fingers can't fly over the keys any faster,
I tremble as I send off the last line.

I stare at the screen minutes later,
Not believing its gone.
But a new fear envelops me
'What if there's no answer?' I shudder.

I wake up before my time,
I pace the house from wall to wall.
Eventually, they left
and I'm alone to access my life.

It takes a while but finally I'm in
and my eyes are in a striking frenzy.
I scan the page up and down,
fervently hoping for some sort of reply.

There isn't any, I turn away;
and my heart starts another tear.
I'll have to wait another day
before I can mend my broken heart again.

I don't give up;
day after day,
I'll come back to see if its coming around.
In the end, it always does.

And the deadly cycle never ends.