Me: Perceptive

Looking for a handsome, tall, well ,groomed man.
Must be tidy and polite, but fun to be around.
Looking for a hot bod, to look good on my arm.
Must be tidy, because lord knows I’m not. And great in the sack.

Me: outgoing, smart and adoring,
I like walks on a beach and long nights talking.
Me intrusive, pompous and clingy.
It is acceptable to wear less clothes on a beach, and I talk over the internet.

Must be up for fun, outgoing, adventurous,
Me: Talkative, expressive, animal lover.
Must be on the psychotic spectrum to have a chance with me.
I’m loud, bazaar and own many reptiles, such as snakes.

Looking for a pretty girl, with a good sense of humour,
Me: shy, sensitive, romantic type.
Looking for a airhead that will look good to my friends,
Me: Overly sensitive obsessive type, with no experience.

Me: outdoorsman, charming and a catch,
Looking for a sporty girl with a high IQ.
Me awaiting you in shrubbery, with a high opinion of myself.
Looking for a beautiful woman to live up to my standards.

Me: Perceptive
Me: I read between the lines