Too Much
I stand as I watch you enter the hall.
You automatically walk over to me and greet me,
your words so unoriginal,
your voice so heavenly.
"Hey Vicci."
The words flow so beautifully.
No one says my name like you.
I smile and reply with the same greeting as you,
"Hey (name of him)."
He smiled back and we carry on a small conversation.
I'm usually the one to end it with a
"We should get to our classes."
And of course, as usual, you agree.
One of us, usually me,
would open their arms wide enough to signal a hug,
And that we did and said a small "bye" or "see ya."
We would do this through out the day.
We'd also strike up small conversations.
Almost all of them ending in "see you later" hugs.
And the thoughts running through my head are what ifs.
A bunch of them.
What if we were actually together,
And that hug symbolized something more than it was meant to be?
What if we were both love sick teenagers lost in a high school relationship?
What if we became high school sweethearts and one day got married?
What if we had a happy marriage with children?
People would be mad,
That's a fact.
I can name at least 5 girls off the top of my head who would be envious.
Who would talk about us.
Five girls that would criticized every move we make.
Everything we'd do.
They would say what a weird couple we made.
And that you could do better.
But that's all they care about,
The looks.
The body type.
The figure.
The person your with and put it in judgment.
Judge me to themselves and their friends.
But none of this matters.
Because you won't see me the same way I see you.
You see me as a friend,
And I will take what I can get.
Those what if thoughts won't pass through your mind.
They might for any of those other girls
But not for me.
Yes I've come to realize this fact.
This fact that gets to me every time I am in this situation.
I've come to peace with this fact.
This fact will stay here.
But that doesn't mean that I can't get upset and hurt.
I just TRY not to fall for the whole situation.
Sometimes my effort isn't enough though and I give in to the pressure.
The pressure that stays in the pit of my stomach or wrapped around my heart.
The one urging me to give up.
I tend to break under these pressure.
The outcomes have all been the same.
Me-0
Broken Hearts- too many
You automatically walk over to me and greet me,
your words so unoriginal,
your voice so heavenly.
"Hey Vicci."
The words flow so beautifully.
No one says my name like you.
I smile and reply with the same greeting as you,
"Hey (name of him)."
He smiled back and we carry on a small conversation.
I'm usually the one to end it with a
"We should get to our classes."
And of course, as usual, you agree.
One of us, usually me,
would open their arms wide enough to signal a hug,
And that we did and said a small "bye" or "see ya."
We would do this through out the day.
We'd also strike up small conversations.
Almost all of them ending in "see you later" hugs.
And the thoughts running through my head are what ifs.
A bunch of them.
What if we were actually together,
And that hug symbolized something more than it was meant to be?
What if we were both love sick teenagers lost in a high school relationship?
What if we became high school sweethearts and one day got married?
What if we had a happy marriage with children?
People would be mad,
That's a fact.
I can name at least 5 girls off the top of my head who would be envious.
Who would talk about us.
Five girls that would criticized every move we make.
Everything we'd do.
They would say what a weird couple we made.
And that you could do better.
But that's all they care about,
The looks.
The body type.
The figure.
The person your with and put it in judgment.
Judge me to themselves and their friends.
But none of this matters.
Because you won't see me the same way I see you.
You see me as a friend,
And I will take what I can get.
Those what if thoughts won't pass through your mind.
They might for any of those other girls
But not for me.
Yes I've come to realize this fact.
This fact that gets to me every time I am in this situation.
I've come to peace with this fact.
This fact will stay here.
But that doesn't mean that I can't get upset and hurt.
I just TRY not to fall for the whole situation.
Sometimes my effort isn't enough though and I give in to the pressure.
The pressure that stays in the pit of my stomach or wrapped around my heart.
The one urging me to give up.
I tend to break under these pressure.
The outcomes have all been the same.
Me-0
Broken Hearts- too many