Drugs And Cutting, I Wish I Could Stop

I'd give it all away,
If it means to take it all back.
I'd give it all away,
If it means to get rid of this life I had.

Shake off the tears,
And dry my hair.
Close the front door,
I'm no longer taking visitors.

Take out a towel,
Prepare myself to bleed.
This way I'll drain myself,
From all life and energy.

A cold razor blade,
Pressed slightly against my skin.
Next thing you know,
I'm digging that blade in.

I dry off the blood,
And roll down my sleeves,
Unlock the door,
And get ready to leave.

I step outside my room,
And right down the hall.
Open the bathroom cabnit,
And out some pills they come!

I take the ones to sleep,
To get me through the night.
And grab a few for when I wake up,
and have to fight.

Grab those few,
To keep me up tomorrow,
And get me through the day.
The few to keep me awake.

I put away the acid,
I don't need it right now.
I'm okay because I got these pills in,
And they can't ever come out!

Next thing you know,
I'm passed out.
This little thrill,
Is my messed up life.

I'd give up the world,
To take back the first pill.
I'd give up the world,
To take back the first drop of acid.

I'd give up the world,
To take back the blade.
I'd give up the world,
For another chance to be saved.

Many people don't realize,
What it's like to live a lie.
Many people don't realize,
Life's not a joke,
For once you've got to take control.

So don't pop that first pill,
Or take that first drop.
Don't roll back your sleeves,
Because you're living a life,
That's never going to stop.
This isn't even really life,
It's an allusion you see,
Everything around you,
Isn't what it seems.