Robot

Why am I laying on this block of ice?
Is it normal to be painfully numb?
I wake up, shower, then brush my teeth twice.
My brain has shut down- I'm so fucking dumb.
I pull my loose shirt straight over my head,
I smear on my makeup mechanically,
wishing the whole time that I was just dead.
I stare at the blank wall hypnotically.
Why am I so confused and so alone?
Is it normal to feel so breakable?
I can't make a sound- when will it be done?
When can i be healed- not be so fragile?
Now I hold these pills in my swollen hand.
Simply take one more and this life can end.