No Chance To Feel Undone

Once upon a time, there was nothing to hide. Once upon a time I knew how to take a life. Screams and lies hanging low would draw a smile; drinking and games they would all sort out the lies. I wish, that the lies, that the world, that the love; I wish that for one day, this would all be gone.
I remember now how it used to have a life. Guilt and pain begone, no chance to feel undone. Everything I did would have a meaning on the side. Everything I did would take the pain and bring the smiles. I wonder how it is, when it is I lost the scene. I wonder what it's like to snatch another life.
I wish that I was cold, so feeling numb would be a chore. I wish that I could die, so I could use the life I took. If only you could see that I truly am not one to set you free. If only you could feel whatever I am yet to reach.
Maybe I am drunk, maybe I'm just doped, maybe I can''t hold what it is that is forlorn. Maybe I'm too high, maybe I can fly. Maybe I am done, maybe I can't hold it down.
I would love to try, take another life. I would like to see all the blood stains on my shirt. Maybe I should hide, maybe I should smile, maybe I could side up with your lies.
Maybe I can't see, maybe I can't be. You know what it is, tell me it's my scene. You can take me now, I know I can lie. I'll do it anyways, might as well be on my own. Maybe I should go, leave all just on your own.
I think I cannot hold, all the lies that I have told, maybe I should sleep so I can see the truth within.